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I thought I was losing my mind



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I had surgery 2/5 and it went fairly well (other than the Really Big Hernia) and I was back home and resting that day. The trouble started on day 3.

I lost my mind.

Not really, but I became sooooo emotional that I was difficult to be around, all teary and snot-slinging. Any little thing would make me cry, or worse yet, sob. I knew something was really wrong when I started crying while watching an episode of iCarly. Really, I don't even like that show.

Well, because I'm a frickin genius who always over-estimates my abilities, I scheduled myself to go back to work 6 days after surgery. Big, big mistake. I work in Mental Health and it was all I could do to keep it together at work. I would go to my co-worker's office and sit on her couch (she's a therapist) and just cry. For days it was like this. I honestly thought that I was getting burned out, that the job was becoming too difficult.

Nah. It was a surgery side effect. My supervising physician came into my office and said, "You know this is normal, right?" So APPARENTLY physicians/surgeons know that surgery causes some people to lose their ****, so to speak. No one warned me about this. There's a little chatter on the boards about it, but I was full-on impaired by my emotions and I for sure wasn't expecting that.

So. Anyone else get this? I have to wonder if there were other factors at play, like the hernia repair and the side effects of poor sleep and starvation (due to that damn liquid diet). What to you all think? Has anyone had comparable surgery (gall bladder, etc) and had a really emotional reaction? I truly think the lack of calories had to have played into it. Because I'm up to about 1000 daily now and I feel soooooo much better.

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I'm not sure which chemical the anesthesiologist use that cause it, but for a lot of people it can cause some really serious depression and emotional instability. Couple that with a complete lack of nutrients and calories, it's no wonder you had such a hard time.

By the way, if you watch these forums, you'll see others that have the same effect. Crying, depression, and downright freaking out. It's very traumatic!

I know I was really depressed. I swear I cried at everything for about a week after my surgery. It took little more than someone looking at me sideways for me to completely snap, rage, then sob. It wasn't fun at all.

Best wishes... you're definitely not alone.

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You just took a big step in your life. The fact that you were so emotional isn't entirely out of the ordinary!

Your doing just fine- remember take it one day at a time

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I have had my ups and downs on this journey too (its only been 20 days). But I have to tell myself it is a major change and it will continue to be, it is kind of like starting you life over, at least the eating part anyway. Babies start with liquids and work their way to solids. LOL babies cry a lot too, when they are in the liquid stage. Lap band is a daily adventure, most days are great . I am in the stage of being freaked out about gaining weight, I never want to go back up on the scales, I think that is what keeps me going when I am feeling really bummed. Good to know I'm not alone. Thanks.

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I'm not sure which chemical the anesthesiologist use that cause it, but for a lot of people it can cause some really serious depression and emotional instability.

This is true. It is extremely common for people to experience depression after anesthesia. I read about this after my BF had a heart attack and had to have a couple of surgeries to place stents in his arteries. I noticed that he came home from the hospital depressed (and he is not a depressive) and found that this was more the rule than the exception following general anesthesia.

The only time I've had general anesthesia was when I had surgery following a broken ankle. 2 days post op I was crying and crying. Well, I was sad to be in a cast for 2 months, sure, but I suspect it was also the consequence of the anesthesia.

Something about it releases emotions.

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I have been crying at the weirdest things.. I'm 12 days post op... I was watching hotel Transylvania w/ my son and cried my eyes out (? Lol)

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Oh my god,i am soo glad i read this....i thought i was friggin' crazy!I'm 6days out and was up at 3 in the morning crying to my husband.over nothing really.it just came upon me as soon as i woke up today.then each person i interacted with today got to see me bawl!!!!

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I was the same way, I think most of us go thru it

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I think also there's a huge food grieving going on. For me, I realized my security blankie had been taken away. I wasn't able to excessively eat to calm myself anymore.

I cried. And cried. And wondered what the hell I had done to myself. And cried.

But it gets easier. I'm on day 27 post op and I feel great. I'm down 10 lbs since surgery. That's 2-3 average per week. And I'm able to run for 8-10 minutes at a time. It gets better. Hang in there.

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    • LeighaTR

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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