I just got off the phone with my mother in law. She was telling me about a man in a scooter getting on a bus lift.

Then she started with how all the people in wheelchairs are fat, and why don't they just stop eating. She went on like this for a couple of minutes.

She would never understand why I need a lap band, and would be very judgmental. Plus, she would blab about my band to all, near and far. (I'm going to keep it private.)

How did that woman raise my wonderful, thoughtful, compassionate husband?

Thanks for listening. I had to vent about her to someone!

I don't blame you one bit! I'm keeping my upcoming surgery top secret to everyone aside from my husband...(duh)! Not even my kids will know....they're too young to understand anyhow.

My brother was banded 3 years ago, and has been very successful. But I don't need any drama from others opinions. I just want to keep this to myself!

I am so shocked reading about disapproving mothers. In my world a mother is the one who wants the best for her child. She is there to comfort her. I honestly can not imagine how hard it must be to have a mother like that...

I'm having weight issues since I know my mind. I was always a chubby kid. Cute, round little thing. But the I grew up and stayed chubby, and then became fat. My BMI is 42 and I am miserable! I am constantly fighting kilos, and losing gaining losing gaining. My struggle is obvious to my family, and actually my mother was the one who opened my eyes to weightloss surgery. She told me she thinks I should get banded. I refused the idea, I told her I will lose it alone...It's been almost a year ago, I am 3 kilos up. So I have decided to get banded. I am selfpay, so it will happen in January and I am more than ready. I have my whole family behind me along with my fiance and I am super happy to have such a strong support "system"

I know you guys need to be extra strong without your mom's support. It must be hard to always feel like you are not good enough and you will be criticized whatever you do. I'll pray for all of us to have the strength in our journey!

I'm sorry you have to deal with people like that in your life. Fortunately, this forum is a great place to vent and get the support you need.

Keeping your surgery a secret is completely understandable and is totally a personal choice, in my case I don't really care whether people know or not, I guess fear of failure it's always lurking on the back of our heads, but if you put it in perspective, you will realize that you just got a great tool that grants you a big advantage in this battle.

I wish you the best

My mom is the last person I would willingly tell. She is of the opinion that most doctors are quacks and just out for money. When I was going through some scary procedures last year to be tested for leukemia (after band & not related) she told me I was thinking myself sick and trying to give myself leukemia by convincing myself I had it... for attention... Whacko. That totally made me feel like I did the right thing with not telling her about my band. I can only imagine what her response to that would be... On the flip side I did tell my stepmom who supported my decision totally. To tell or not to tell is a case by case person by person basis for me. Close minded judgmental people have no business knowing my business.

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