My Only Real Reason The Truth.

[lito 11]

I haven't been completely honest with the people around me which is something that isn't normal in my character since I have always been an honest person. I have been telling people at work that I had a procedure done, my family that it was an emergency surgery, i deleted my face book so i wouldnt slip and throw a status update. I even went to the extent to break up with my girl friend so she wouldnt know the truth. I don't think that I'm embarrassed of what I did because I don't regret it. I do think it's my pride and the worry of what people will say like I'm a failure or that's the easy way out I have no courage to do it on my own. Truthfully I must admit growing up I was fit played football and lacrosse from my peewee years into my collage years even trained with an nfl team up north as a temp. But I had an accident that changed my life broke my leg and went from 180 pounds solid to this 331 pounds of fat I could of stopped but I became a workaholic sucssesful young cute chunky with a personality that shined thru any room club bar or place so my confidence was never the issue and mind you a wonderful girlfriend that one day might of been my wife and mother of my children Italian beautiful catholic currently doing her residence at Colombia. Ironic how I worked so hard on not feeling fat not looking fat or as people would say smell like a fattie. I dressed well clean and presented myself with pride confidence cockiness to the point I wouldn't feel bad I did work out felt healthy no diabetease no high blood pressure nothing that made my obesity mortal so I continued to work out loose some weight failed ate food at my lesiure when I traveled when I celebrated or even when it wasn't my celebration. Till one day my castle I built from the sands of my denial came crashing down as I was ready for the biggest meeting of my career I felt flushed my cheeks turned red so I took a seat till I felt that my presentation was to be given with appropriate attention and no distraction mind you the client is waiting as I walked in I took the last breath of my self lies as my presentation was executed properly deal closed after a glass of Dom rose as a celebration toast I then walked out of the presentation room. I took 14 steps to the elevator to find myself on the 19th floor in my new office over looking down town new york city what a view i was the new youngest senior excecutive in our company I fell to my knees in tears and held the floor as if the exhaustion I felt in my body and bones came from my triumph of all the hard work that I have put in the last few years of my life but that wasn't the case I was having heart spasums that led to a mild stroke Dat day. With a flash I saw my child hood in the suburbs of rockland county with my parents and siblings my college years my football years my intern years in Atlanta Georgia working hard for the Atlanta falcons labor day weekend with my girlfriend in the hamptons or out at touch NYC living the life with my friends or those endless Sunday dinners with the family traveling for work or fun n then thars what became all the reason on why I decided to live and do this. My doctor said its an emergency for me to do this because only I can determine how much longer I breath a healthy livable life. I know that now on my own I can't do this alone and i cant continue to lie to myself and live in this denial. this Sunday I will come clean with everybody and tell them the truth with out fear of their judgment. This is my journey only I decide how much longer I choose to live. My only real reason the only real truth is that I want to live I choose to live I need to live.

[GirlieGirl723 2]

Wow!! What a amazing story, just know that you are not alone.. I myself feel like you, I was always fit and very active untill I turned 21 and was diagnosed with bone cancer. I had to have my knee, femur and hip replaced twice. I am not active and just started to aim weight. Because I have a prosthetic in my leg I have many limitations. Now I have a three year old son I can't keep up with. I know getting banded will be great for me. And no matter what ppl say, I chose to only tell my immediate family and no one else needs to know. They just won't understand..when are you having ur procedure??

[lito 11]

Wow!! What a amazing story' date=' just know that you are not alone.. I myself feel like you, I was always fit and very active untill I turned 21 and was diagnosed with bone cancer. I had to have my knee, femur and hip replaced twice. I am not active and just started to aim weight. Because I have a prosthetic in my leg I have many limitations. Now I have a three year old son I can't keep up with. I know getting banded will be great for me. And no matter what ppl say, I chose to only tell my immediate family and no one else needs to know. They just won't understand..when are you having ur procedure??[/quote']

I had my surgery on 3/13/2012. It's hard but it was well worth it to me. Wow bone cancer at 21 I can only imagine what you must of gone thru emotionally and spiritually. God bless you you are strong as it is just hold on to the thought of one day keeping up with your son. I'll keep you in my prayers.

[Violet953 46]

Sweetie please tell them..I have a feeling everybody will be very happy for you! You did the right thing...but you are right you need to tell them now. I understand though why people don't like to tell...I however told everybody I know and I have never had a negative reaction to it. Not everybody understands the lapband though...you tell somebody WLS and they automatically think Gastric Bypass...so I find you really need to tell people what its all about too. Good luck...you will feel great once you get this weight off your shoulders in more ways than one.

[caramelqueen 1]

Wow! It's hard telling family of the decisions you make in life, especially if they don't understand why. Truthfully I only told a selected few in my family and friends. I feel everyone doesn't need to know. Your decision is just that YOUR'S and some family don't want to hear why because they feel surgery is a cop out not knowing your battles that you deal with day to day. Good luck keep strong and no matter what if you feel it in your heart this was the best decision don't let know one tell you different!!!!

[ladyfromirvine 22]

(CHUCKLING......I broke up with my boyfriend just before I had the procedure for the same reasons.. plus the man ate at every turn and never gained an once and expected me to match him bite for bite.... didn't need the sabatoge...got bigger fist to fry) Lied to coworkers and told only my closest tight lipped friends. I think i did it because I fear the same failures I've had in the past and I don't want to have to explain another failure to every person I know... but hey.. good news I got banded feb 9th, have lost 25 pounds (without restriction) and go for my first fill march 22.... and here's the kicker.. I've learned a new language called lapbandese... has words like, banded, fill, restriction, bping, sliming, etc etc......and I figure.. when I reach goal weight... I'll try to find a man who eats less and NEVER pushes food at me.

[jenjaw 13]

Just let them all know! I bet they will all be supportive! I found that all of my friends were sooo supportive and my family was only worried about the surgery itself, my husband and my mom were nervous wreckes about me being put under....what life would be like for me after.....etc BUT, 8 months laters and 100 lbs lighter.........they are so supportive and proud of me. I tell anyone who asks how I did it and even if I down play it alittle people are always very happy for me and feel that it takes just as much dedication as regular diet methods. Tell, you'll be glad you did!

[Carolinegee 11]

Please tell them. And remember this is for you not for them. When I made my decision to have surgery I was also hesitant but now as I become more closer to my goal I feel stupid for being scared in the first place.. At times they ask me I'd b I'm putting some cream for the scars to disappear, I say no. because this surgery is one of the things I'm most proud of.

[Allison0927 329]

Great story - probably hard for you to share all that but glad you did. I am a successful, highly educated professional and worried about the stigma of the surgery but decided screw it - if anyone wants to judge me let them - why should I care. Friends, family, and even some clients that I am close to having worked with them for so many years, have all been EXTREMELY SUPPORTIVE. Obviousy I only know what people tell me to my face and do not know what goes on behind closed doors - BUT really - who cares? Everyone (with the exception of your closest loved ones who would do anything for you) in the end does what is best for themselves and that is all you are doing. I can relate to a lot of parts of your story - even 100 pounds ago I was told all the time (by men and women alike) that I was beautiful - I was always very careful to dress for my size and had tons of friends (told I have a great personality but will sound braggy if I say it outright LOL). BUT I knew to be truly happy, confident and complete I needed to lose the weight. I had no health problems at all going into this - I just wanted to look better and be more confident. 8 months and more than 100 pounds lost later - you can bet I feel unstoppable. Tell people or don't tell people - either way just follow the plan and lose the weight and everything will be better than fine for you. BEST OF LUCK TO US ALL ON OUR JOURNEYS!!!!

[Lollicatt 36]

Wow, such a powerful story. Contrasts on your new journey and the decision to get healthy. Who you tell and if you tell is your business . Your life is just beginning. Please keep us posted on your successes!

[gem85 0]

Well done! I also had my surgery on the 13th and finding things very difficult. I hope they get better for u and me xx

[kll724 3,055]

Lito, you have alot to look forward to. Just be thankful that the warning signs were not deadly! Good luck, I know that your family and friends will support you.

[Back~To~Amy 307]

I understand how hard it is to tell them. I've wanted to have this surgery for years, but telling people stopped me. I am the only one in my family who is really overweight. I am very successful in all aspects of my life except my weight and it was embarrasing to admit that by admitting I wanted WLS. However, I will be meeting my deductible and annual out of pocket because of another surgery. I called my insurance company and told WLS would be free once I met my out of pocket so I felt I had no choice but to mention it to my BFF, Mom and Sister who are all skinny. I mean who would be stupid enough to pass it up if it were free, right? They were all SOOOO supportive of me. What a relief! I did find out though it won't be free. I was given wrong information but I'm still leaning toward doing it.

Best of luck to you!

[lito 11]

Thank you to everyone I am going to tell them today as my brother said there is nothing to be ashamed about.

[cfalbro 23]

Good for you for telling. I told everyone I know. I haven't had any negativity about it, only support and it's been wonderful having all of that support. I hope you get the same response. Good luck.