Are you keeping it private?

For now - I am pretty private - only told family and one close friend. I kind of have an itch to tell people - because I am so excited, but for some reason I am afraid. You?

I haven't told everyone I know but I have told some friends. My whole family knows and I have not gotten much support from my mom and brother. My mom thinks that I will treat this as a magic wand and not put any effort into exercising. My brother practically told me that I am cheating. Oh well, it isn't their body. My husband has been super supportive and I think he is excited to have a thinner wife. All the friends that I have told are very supportive. I was receiving text messages and phone calls the day before and after my surgery to make sure that I was doing ok.

I think as time goes on and I start to lose more weight, I will have to tell people. I don't want to lie to people but I am concerned about what people think. But, if they can't accept that I had to have surgery, then they aren't a true friend.

I see this as my personal decision and won't be telling anyone.

I'/m with you. Right now I am private about it my immediate family knows obviously, mom, dad, sister, and her fiance. My bosses at work know, one I've been friends with for many years, he was actually the first person I told when I started the process. A girl at work knows, my other supervisor told her which I was originally annoyed at, but she has the lap band too, so I can talk about my issues with her, so it is good. And one friend knows. I think when the weight starts really coming off I may tell other people, but for now it is my thing. A few people have mentioned it looked like I was losing weight and I said yeah, I am watching what I eat.

Pretty much, but it's on a need to know basis. I don't just go telling everyone I meet for no reason.

shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... this is my secret!!! The only one who knows is my very supportive hubby. However, people are now starting to wonder how I'm losing weight. I just tell them I working with my Dr. to get healthy. I've had some major thyroid problems in the past, and most people (including family) are happy to see that I finally found a Dr. who can actually help me get all my health issues under control. I agree it's a personal decision......and maybe when I reach my goal weight, I "might" share my secret. Right now, I'm just focusing on me and getting this weight off.

After hearing all of the negative feedback people say about WLS I don't feel comfortable saying anything. I find that it's a personal decision and that I'll do better being my own positive influence than risking negative feedback or comments, talking behind my back, etc. There's really no reason for anyone to know the specifics.

I tell just about anyone! It is part of who I am.....I work in healthcare, so no one has questioned it.....they have been very supportive. I find it easier than explaining why I am eating different, or why during a meeting I may whip out a cheese stick LOL.

Jackie

I am keeping it quite quiet as well. I told my parents and my two best friends and that's all...not even my brother or sister. It was really hard at first because we just recently moved across the country and we don't know anyone here except I have a few cousins. In order to have the surgery I needed someone to come and stay with my kids so my husband could take me into Toronto...so I told my cousin I was having gall bladder surgery...I figured it would explain a bunch of things without me having to be totally honest. I told them I had to do the two week liquid diet for the same reasons as I really had to.

I asked my Dr. if it was normal to be so secretive and he said it was more common NOT to tell than for people TO tell. He said some of his patients don't even tell their husbands!!! Typically, he says people follow a pattern: They think this is just another diet attempt that they're going to fail at, so they don't tell anyone...then at 3 months out when it's working, they tell a couple more people...and by 6 months when they realize it really, really is working...they start to tell everyone.

I will eventually tell my family that I lied to them...but I'm still afraid that I'm going to fail.

I hadn't intended to tell everyone at work, but after being off three weeks and coming back many pounds lighter, everyone kept asking me what I did because the change was so dramatic. If I mentioned I had surgery, they all got concerned (I work at a hospital, so it's built in, I think.) So I finally started telling anyone who asked. I figure word will get out anyway (did I mention I work at a hospital? People gossip like CRAZY!) so I decided to come out to anyone who was interested. The only person who has said anything negative to me was a nurse at the hospital where I had my surgery. (That isn't where I work.) If anyone else has a negative attitude, they haven't expressed it to me. And if they don't like it, who the hell cares? It's MY life, and MY health, not theirs.

One positive side effect: Several people who could benefit from WLS have asked me for more in-depth information about it. So maybe by being honest I can help others to help themselves. I believe in paying it forward.

Dave

I intended to tell no one.... and then I had the surgery. I realized how brave we are to have SURGERY to fix this major problem. I also realized that I was not telling people because I was afraid that they would think I was looking for an easy way out. Anyone with a band knows this is not easy!!! The easy way out was staying FAT. I tell everyone. Some people are shocked, some I am sure think I cheated. But I will tell you, most are inspired. Most recognize my committment to my health - and honestly, I need whatever push I can get and this comes from the nay-sayers. The other day at the gym a man who I know from my kids' school came up to me and said, wow, you look great. You've lost a lot of weight - and I said my typical response - THANK YOU!! I had some help. And I told him about the band - and he said, yeah, I know some about the band - but what I know is that it doesn't work if you don't do the work. NICE!!!!!!!!!! and RIGHT ON!!!! I am doing the work - and I have a partner. BE PROUD - and don't be afraid to be an inspiration to others.

I got my band last year when I taught at a different school and everyone knew and I didn't care, including my family and close friends but I started teaching at a different school in a different district and since August have lost about 30 more pounds (88 this year) and they have noticed but I belong to a Weight Watchers at Work group and I guess they figure I actually track those stupid points. I just go for the comraderie and healthy food ideas. I am not renewing this month though. When people ask how I am doing it, I tell them I am eating smaller portions (thank you LB), exercising 3-4 times a week (Y-M-C-A, and controlling by blood sugar (my dr is pleased as punch)...it's all the truth....I don't think they need to know

I've only told family, some people at church and two people at work (my boss, who said he'd take my secret to his grave (how sweet is that?) and the office nurse (just in case; she kinda has to keep it in confidence). I just don't want everyone to know. I don't want them to look down on me for choosing to get the band (everyone thinks it is a magic tool). Well, we still have to work at it even with the band.

Like dave and jackie I work in the hospital and I see how my "thinner" co-workers complain about obese people but then when we see they have had WLS all I ever hear is "see, the magic wand didn't work" even tho one person had it and is open about it ppl still say behind her back "she cheated, look at what she eats now, its not fair..." she was my inspiration for starting this whole process, and although I see she is 3 yrs out and just maintaning so she doesent always make the best food choices and eats crap at work sometimes (junk food, candy, cookies, chips, ect. Are always available behind the nurses station...at the hospital isn't that horrible?) she's been there for me. After all that everyone knew I had "some surgery" bc after telling my boss in confidentiality she went out and told everyone so that they could pick up my hrs instead of her just re-doing the schedual and when ppl ask I tell them it was a "personal private" surgery...and that's enough for most but some nosey people keep proding and I don't tell them what, just some abd surgery since I'm back to work and on light duty. Its funny to hear what ppl think I had done...breast reduction (I wish, those are next if they don't shrink some , hernia, gallbladder, tubal ligation...but only 2 ppl have guessed correctly, but never to my face. I figure like someone said above when I know the wt is comin off and stayin off I might be more open, but not right now. Plus, the comment above, about ppl see u had it and then get it is true...the 2 who has guessed correctly asked my friend at work who had the WLS how to start the process....I figure I will have to tell them when I see them at the joint pre post op groups my surg requires, but like everyone there knows I'm a closet bandster so they are the best

(Hope that helps some, if not thanks for letting me get that all off my chest, hard not telling anyone and those who do know...so, mom, dad were very supportive after the initial shock as I didn't tell mom n dad till post op...now onto tell best friends next week when I see them as someone posted on fb "hope surg went well" and they saw and I didn't tell them over the phone, I think its easier to do in person

I didn't intend to tell anyone, but my husband let the cat out of the bag at his work (again hospital based), so there that went. LOL

I don't tell everyone who comments on my loss, but I do share if someone seems very interested, especially if I see that they are someone who might benefit from banding. I agree with Pay It Forward. There has been one person at my gym who has gotten banded since watching me lose and another at my church who has visited my doctor and is in the process of deciding whether to band or sleeve.

I also tell my other healthcare providers (big duh) and I've told the trainers I work with at my gym. I tell the trainers so that they understand when I don't want to do extreme situps (from a heads down position while sitting on a ball) or any other exercise that puts a huge amount of stress on the abdomen. Keyword, huge. I will do regular crunches and ab exercises, just not extremes.

All my immediate family knows (sisters, brothers in law, parents are deceased), but not extended family. I'll tell if asked, but we're not in that close of contact.

This is the post Ive been looking for thanks. I havn't been banded yet but I don't plan on telling alot of people, especially co workers. I work in a call center and we all know how that goes. Anyway so far Ive told just my immediately family(mother brother and aunt and 3 close friends) 2 out of the 6 think its a good ideal my auntie had no comment and the other 2 are completely against it. Going forward I will tell no one else which is really had because its something I want to openly talk about, but now that I 've this forum I can talk to you guys . In the meantime If I'm banded I guess I have to make up some lie. I've already joined a gym and last week started eating better so some people will already see my efforts.