My husband and I have been married for two years. We have been together since 2005. We have always had a up and down relationship but for the most part he has always supported me in any choices I have ever made. We have discussed me getting the band and my weight loss he is also over weight and I tried to get him to go through this with me. One of my reasons for doing this is we want a child but he and I want to be healthy before we start having children. I have high blood pressure and want a safe pregnancy. So to my main question I see a lot of people saying there marriage has ended or is on the rocks after lap band. Is this a common problem out there? Not that it would effect my decision but I believe this is a big change not just for me but for him as well. I have said over the past few weeks one of my main stressors pre op is I don't know how to do the things I do know after surgery something as simple as making my husband a meal seems overwhelming to me post surgery.. Any suggestions on a one band marriage? I am hoping to do well and inspire him to start living a healthy life as well.

My husband and I have been married for two years. We have been together since 2005. We have always had a up and down relationship but for the most part he has always supported me in any choices I have ever made. We have discussed me getting the band and my weight loss he is also over weight and I tried to get him to go through this with me. One of my reasons for doing this is we want a child but he and I want to be healthy before we start having children. I have high blood pressure and want a safe pregnancy. So to my main question I see a lot of people saying there marriage has ended or is on the rocks after lap band. Is this a common problem out there? Not that it would effect my decision but I believe this is a big change not just for me but for him as well. I have said over the past few weeks one of my main stressors pre op is I don't know how to do the things I do know after surgery something as simple as making my husband a meal seems overwhelming to me post surgery.. Any suggestions on a one band marriage? I am hoping to do well and inspire him to start living a healthy life as well.

People who marriage r on the rock after they r band. Marriage was on the rock before the band. I think once your husband see u eating healthy he want to eat right. Beside if u doing the cooking he has no choice but to eat what you cook. And u can just cook healthy way I been marry 24 years now Soon to be 25 year in April. I was band on Nov 22 this year I cook low carbs and the whole family eat an dont even know it low carb lol. I order pizza but I don't eat it. But we can have it I choose not to. So don't feel your life has to change because of what you read. Only thing he will have to buy you a new wardrobe lol

We are a one banded marriage. My husband has never been fat and has little idea of what it is like. When we have difference of opinion about band issues I explain the best I can but this is what I need and why. At the same time I DON'T enforce my lifestyle onto him. I don't push him to eat the same things I eat nor excercise like I do. This is my hole to climb out of. I would appreciate his help very much but it's not required. We have a temptation free home for me. No food that is a temptation for me is allowed in until I trust myself to stay away from it. However if he wants to go out, we do. He orders what ever he likes and I order according to my guidelines. If he wants chips for his lunch, he keeps them at work. He is willing to do this because he loves me and understands how important it is to me. He listens to me when I explain what I need. I had heard the rumor too that marriages fail after weight loss but it doesn't have to be yours. Share in this together and he will be proud of you for overcoming. I ran my first 5k last week and he declined to run with me but rushed over from work to see me cross the finish line and cheer me on. It was an awesome show of support even though I would have preferred him to join me. It was a great compromise. You can make it.

Any big change can bring stress into a marriage but if the foundation is solid then things should be fine. I'm banded but my morbidly obese husband has so far said no to getting the band. One of the stressors to come from the band is that since I'm spending so much time and attention on myself and my health, as opposed to putting everyone else first, so that's been something we've all had to adapt to.

I also feel like I'm leaving my husband behind in that he's still stuck in fatland and I'm not. He's been delaying taking the kids to Disney for the last few years because he's too big (mid to upper 300's) to ride on many of the rides nor does he go with us to the local Water park (something I did even when at my heaviest). I really wish he'd get the band but I don't bring it up anymore because it's his choice.

Good luck!