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I think it's important to talk about what we're eating. We do a lot of that. In minutia. We lable foods good and evil. We obsess about the "right" diet, calories, choices, etc.... But that's really the easy part. The hard part is figuring out WHY we're eating. WHY we ate ourselves to morbid obesity, and what need we were trying to address when we put that food in our bodies. I feel like if those needs aren't figured out and meaningfully delt with this whole process is really vulnerable to failure. I feel like we never talk about why we ate so much. I'm not saying we need pity party hour with extensive confessionals chronicallying every challenge, insecurity and poopy life event...lol. But I feel like sharing those little eureka moments were we've identified some little unmet need that resulted in bad choices....would be a good thing. For instance.... I used to get the KFC six million calorie dinner with the 12 pieces of chicken, 3 sides, biscuits and the chocolate chip cake....after grocery shopping. It was almost an unwritten thing. I deserved it. In some weird justification, I figured that I was shopping, carrying stuff in, putting things away, selflessly giving up time to a task I sort of despised for my family. Of course I deserved chicken! But really, what I wanted at the core of things....was support. I wanted to feel appreciated, and rewarded for being a good doobie. I wanted to feel nurtured after a stressful task that I hated. These days....we have a new rule at the house. The person who does the grocery shopping gets to relax and take a bath while the other person does the cooking. And you know what? It works. I feel appreciated, supported. And I eat a more balanced decent dinner and have a win. That feels good. I learned that I geninely don't like asking for help...and that I need to more often. Just writing that makes me cringe. My bariatric therapist did a lot of talking about the "whys" of over eating, and finding ways to get the desired needs met that aren't self sabotaging. I wish we talked about the "whys" more.

Tomorrow morning at 7am is the big day 😃😱

I’m another one of the lucky ones that never really had any issues with liquids and restriction. I’m only 13 weeks out and down 57lbs, but can gulp water almost like I did before surgery. I still have food restrictions and limitations, though. Once I started semi solid foods, it became very apparent that liquids and foods are definitely not the same beast.

I've been planning to have the sleeve, and have done all the pre-op requirements. If all goes well, I want to do WLS over the summer. I've been planning on the sleeve, as it's what my surgeon recommended for me, but now I'm wondering if I should go for the bypass. I'm in my late 40s (done having kids, so fertility/pregnancy is not a factor in my decision), have a BMI of just over 35, with PCOS, diabetes, hypertension, and recently diagnosed with small fiber neuropathy (we're not sure of the cause, though I've read a study showing WLS improves symptoms). When I asked my surgeon why she recommended the sleeve, she said it's because I have relatively less weight to lose, and, although it will require work and being vigilant with diet, she thinks it will be successful for me, and is less invasive and risky, though she also said she would be willing to do the bypass if it's what I want. My endocrinologist said that the bypass has additional mechanisms by which it can resolve metabolic issues, but she'd suggest asking my surgeon about her rate of complications with bypass. She also said she'd be less inclined to push bypass for me, though, because my diabetes is well-controlled on one medication (A1c is usually between 5.7 to 6.0). My cardiologist strongly advised me to go with the sleeve, because she has a number of patients who were a "hot mess," medically, after bypass. I want to resolve my cardio-metabolic issues, but the risks of bypass also really concern me. I've never been anemic, but I've been deficient in other vitamins and have experienced hair loss and other issues as a result, so I'm concerned I may be at greater risk for deficiencies and other unwanted consequences with the bypass. I'm not sure how to decide this...help?

I hate "weightloss journey" too. I don't mind if anyone says it....it's my personal hang up, too. It's just so cheesily coined from My 600 Pound Life or something. My eye twitches over it. It's really not a bad term or anything...it just feels overused and cliche and makes me grit my teeth a little. I picture two dogs and a cat on a log with a bear or something. I have issues. LOL.

I always had a butt. When I was in my 20’s and normal weight (150), I actually had a guy, at a club, tell me I had a big butt. It was acknowledged all around that I had a moderately big butt. I figured I would still have a butt after WLS, but I was wrong. 😭 It is gone. I do resistance training specifically to to strengthen, shape, and increase size of said butt, and I think it has helped. I has plastic surgery a month ago including a belt lipectomy in order to get rid of the loose skin on my butt (it was super uncomfortable to sit on). I now have a 20-something year old, tiny butt😂 The struggle is real. I also lost of of my breasts, going from a 40DD to a 34A. My recent plastic surgery fixed that though, with lift and augmentation. Yay for plastic surgery! Below is my post-plastic surgery butt. I have found it looks best in cheeky bikini bottoms, as the lower part of my butt is the only part with ANY shape. Also shown is my pre-plastics butt, complete with sagging skin. 🤦🏼‍♀️

You are definitely not alone. Every time I am alone in my car it wants to steer directly to a fast food place. Doesn't matter which one but I steer my brain to the end game instead. It is definitely tempting.

July 13th surgery. I am having a revision from sleeve to bypass for GERD. I don't have to do a two week diet just a 3 day liquid one. I have my pre op visit tomorrow

Respectfully, I suggest when you see a topic you aren’t interested in just move along. This is clearly a topic that has great meaning to many of the members of our group. We come here for support. The LGBTQIA+ community has been discriminated against, targeted, and hated by much of society. Here they should experience nothing but love and support as they work through many of the same, but some unique to just them, issues related to their weight and health.

That's so funny, it bothers me too! I have absolutely no idea why, but I never use it.