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Phoenix Rising's Blog
 

Botheration! Now I Have Deleted A Comment I Was Trying To Read***!*!*!*

I know I mentioned before that I was not computer literate, but boy, I didn't expect to be able to show everyone how computer illiterate I am so quickly!!!! Sorry to the person who had commented on my last entry (I didn't even get a chance to see the name!) While trying to read it I managed to delete it. Oh well, hopefully you will see this and understand that it was not intentional.   The last two days have been quite trying. Not because of the lack of food, but because of (for those sensitive types you may want to stop reading) severe constipation. Wow, who knew it could get that bad. Thankfully I had some fybrogel in the house and got it sorted but not before a lot of discomfort. I think I shall take this every other day for a while to make sure everything is back on track. On the up side, I have lost some more weight. Hooray. I am on day 11 of the liquid diet so have broken the back of it now. I am on the downward count to my operation. Only 7 more to go.   As I have not told people about my forthcoming surgery, I have been looking online to see how people who are a long way out are coping and how much they are able to eat. I don't want people to guess by what I am eating about the surgery. I was pleasantly surprised. Before starting the liquid diet I had been eating a fairly full diet but greatly reduced portions and low on carbs. From what I have seen this will be pretty much what I will be able to eat a year from now. I had been eating off a small tea plate rather than a dinner plate to ensure my portions didn't creep up. Judging by the photos people have posted online, this is about the size of meals vsg'ers are able to manage.   I am also losing inches, following someone's advice on this forum I took a great many measurements (which in itself was pretty horrifying) as they said this was a great way to track your losses even when the scale refused to move. I will eventually post those measurements, but not until I have lost some more. (Pathetic isn't it, like if you don't know my measurements you won't be able to tell that I am fat!!!) Who am I kidding, if I wasn't fat I wouldn't be having surgery. Well it is very late in England and I have to be up very early in the morning so Goodnight all and hopefully I won't delete the next load of comments.
Phoenix Rising

Phoenix Rising

1
gramaof4's Blog
 

Comin Along On My New Way Of Life

Well, today is day 14 I am now 2 weeks post opt. I am still feeling super, I have been back to work since Monday and am tired at night but feel good the next morning. I have lost 26 lbs. today is the first day I didn't see the scale fall...:-(   I am struggling with the family trying to make every wonderful pastery, cookie, donut and pie they know how, all in one week they made a huge batch of brownies , blackberry pie and turn overs, donuts, and homemade french fries....grrr...and then they tell me how wonderful they taste and sorry that I "CAN"T HAVE ANY"...kinda hurt my feelers.   I plan to make a huge success out of this tool I have paid so much for...I WILL SUCCEED!   I do believe I will readjust my weight goal once I hit my original goal...I have decided once I hit my goal I am gonna go for the gusto and loose another 40# and I will weigh less than my husband and my 12 yr. old son! I will show them who can and will and who did succeed! Thank You to Dr. Aceves and his fabulous team who gave me this wonderful tool!
gramaof4

gramaof4

6
Dig It Dog
 

School Is Stressful, Weight Loss Is What It Is!

I have a test everyday, in every class this coming week! I'm trying to focus on my animal anatomy and physiology class and lab since those are the toughies! but my animal and zoonotic diseases class is hard as well, so is my animal care class! Ha! I should be studying, but i'm a procrastinator!   Weight loss is what it is, I need to get to the gym more, i need to introduce a bigger variety of foods to my diet, i need to restart measuring my food instead of eye balling it i need to stop being afraid of certain foods since my unfill will allow them to pass with out pain! I need to do a lot of things!!!!!!!   I should think about getting a social life but i have too much to do! and too many distractions already! Ha!
Tanya_cotto

Tanya_cotto

2
J. Fabulous' Blog
 

The Story Of Eggs

My brain feels like molasses; like brown sugary goo. I don’t feel the sense of euphoria I expected or was described to me in this “honeymoon period” of my surgery. In fact, if I had to describe it, I’d say … Continue reading →
Jack Fabulous

Jack Fabulous

0
MsDebi's Blog
 

I Can't Believe I'm On My Way!

So very much has happened since my last blog in November. I suppose I got rather frustrated at times which is probably a normal way to feel when one is trying to get something so life changing scheduled. When I realized that being sleeved by the end of the year wasn't going to happen, I relaxed a bit and just decided to enjoy the wait as much as possible. To make a long story short, my insurance did not cover my surgery so I ended up being self pay. That's ok. I don't care. I had my sleeve done on Monday, March 5, 2012. I barely one week out, so I still have a lot to learn. I am so very happy tho. I don't care how fast or slow my weight comes off. It's coming off. That's enough for me!!
MsDebi

MsDebi

5
pipenred's Blog
 

Sleeve Date 3/27/12

hey im being sleeved 3/27/12 can u give me advice on what to expect first two weeks after surgery and do think i will be able to return to work! im self employed!!!!!! God Bless You Any pre-surgery diets to follow Atkins is hard
pipenred

pipenred

2
A Year of Possibilities
 

Post-Op Day 66: Blech

So it's been a while. I have been uber busy with work and tutoring and the theater, so I haven't made much time for anything else. Including eating right and exercising. So it's no wonder that I haven't seen much weight loss since my fill. Consequently, I got discouraged today when I weighed myself and the scale was still resting in the mid-260s. And then I ate. Not because I was hungry, but because it was there. And it wasn't healthy. And it wasn't particularly enjoyable. And I didn't get full. How can I not get full when I have 8ccs in my 10cc band? This makes no sense to me. I'm feeling frustrated and a little discouraged.   I knew I wasn't eating right during the past two weeks and I blamed my crazy hectic schedule and promised myself I would do a "band test" after the play closed. Well, we closed Friday night and I start the band test tomorrow, so at least I didn't blow that. But I was really hoping to be out of the 260s by my next fill on Thursday and I really don't see that happening. Especially after that very large piece of banana bread (complimentary from the breakfast restaurant because they forgot to give me my beef bacon; I never would have ordered it!) and that homemade nacho dip with corn tortillas (because it was there). I've been good with portion control, but I have been eating too fast and certainly not the right things. Just because I can eat one cheeseburger over the course of four meals doesn't mean I should! I need to remember not to beat myself up over the bad choices and to praise myself for the good ones. Like declining the offer every time someone tries to hand me chocolate or soda or chips, which I would've said yes to pre-surgery. Or climbing the stairs sometimes - though not as often as I should - instead of taking the elevator. And despite my poor choices, at least I haven't gained. I've always said I'm very good at maintaining. Well, here we have it. A very high stress month and I haven't gained. I should be happy about that. Shouldn't I? But I didn't have the surgery so I could be happy because I didn't gain. I had it so I could lose! I want to be a loser!   Well, now that the show is over, I can focus more on my food intake and exercise and hopefully get back on track. I really wish that this country had a support group for people with the band so that I had a network here of people to encourage me and advise me. I feel I'm going at this sort of...blindly. I want to talk to people who have been successful and find out what they did so I can do it, too. Any advice, guys? What's worked for you?
meloney

meloney

0
A Year of Possibilities
 

Post-Op Day 66: Blech

So it's been a while. I have been uber busy with work and tutoring and the theater, so I haven't made much time for anything else. Including eating right and exercising. So it's no wonder that I haven't seen much weight loss since my fill. Consequently, I got discouraged today when I weighed myself and the scale was still resting in the mid-260s. And then I ate. Not because I was hungry, but because it was there. And it wasn't healthy. And it wasn't particularly enjoyable. And I didn't get full. How can I not get full when I have 8ccs in my 10cc band? This makes no sense to me. I'm feeling frustrated and a little discouraged.   I knew I wasn't eating right during the past two weeks and I blamed my crazy hectic schedule and promised myself I would do a "band test" after the play closed. Well, we closed Friday night and I start the band test tomorrow, so at least I didn't blow that. But I was really hoping to be out of the 260s by my next fill on Thursday and I really don't see that happening. Especially after that very large piece of banana bread (complimentary from the breakfast restaurant because they forgot to give me my beef bacon; I never would have ordered it!) and that homemade nacho dip with corn tortillas (because it was there). I've been good with portion control, but I have been eating too fast and certainly not the right things. Just because I can eat one cheeseburger over the course of four meals doesn't mean I should! I need to remember not to beat myself up over the bad choices and to praise myself for the good ones. Like declining the offer every time someone tries to hand me chocolate or soda or chips, which I would've said yes to pre-surgery. Or climbing the stairs sometimes - though not as often as I should - instead of taking the elevator. And despite my poor choices, at least I haven't gained. I've always said I'm very good at maintaining. Well, here we have it. A very high stress month and I haven't gained. I should be happy about that. Shouldn't I? But I didn't have the surgery so I could be happy because I didn't gain. I had it so I could lose! I want to be a loser!   Well, now that the show is over, I can focus more on my food intake and exercise and hopefully get back on track. I really wish that this country had a support group for people with the band so that I had a network here of people to encourage me and advise me. I feel I'm going at this sort of...blindly. I want to talk to people who have been successful and find out what they did so I can do it, too. Any advice, guys? What's worked for you?
meloney

meloney

0
jennifer1's Blog
 

Junior/misses Section

Just wanted to drop a quick note. I got my unfill last monday and so far so good. it takes me about 4-5 hours before i'm "hungry" and my portions are controlled. needless to say I still am figthing that 1-2 last pounds to get to onederland. however i went shopping yesterday because i needed an outfit in a specific color for a womens conference. well i went into a little cheapy store and asked where the size 12's were since i saw the plus sized section started at size 14. she told me in the junior/misses section. I JUST STOOD THERE FOR WHAT SEEMED LIKE AN ETERNITY. ME GET CLOTHES OUT OF THE JUNIOR.MISSES SECTION. my heart started racing. i know this sounds crazy but i was totally freaked out for a minute. I HAVE NEVER BOUGHT CLOTHES ANYWHERE OTHER THAN THE PLUS SIZE SECTION. so when i bought everything from that side of the store it was soooo weird. i was happy but it was so hard to wrap my mind around the fact that i could. i even bought a tank top in a medium from that side of the store. ok just wanted to share that experience right quick. hope all is well with everyone. s/n from our conference. WHATEVER IT IS...LET IT GO!!! peace and blessings jennifer
jennifer1

jennifer1

3
Ready2BFit's Blog
 

Freaking Out About Surgery

What is really going on with me? I have taken the liberity to read and view as much information as possible about the surgery. My last surgery was in 2003 for my gall bladder and everything turned out well and I was heavier than I am now. But right now, every scared thought is in my mind from a heart attack, blood clots, stroke and the list goes on. i don't want anything to go wrong during surgery but I have to realize that my surgeon had done this many times on individuals and I don't understand why I am stressing. This is a phase I don't want to think about since I am three weeks before my surgery and want to have an open mind.   On today, I had a long conversation with my mom and she is really supportive and it surprised me but I know she understands it is for my health. Being a mother, I just want everything to be fine and maybe I am just being afraid for nothing.   Anyone else dealt with this type of feeling?
Ready2BFit

Ready2BFit

10
Rhapsody's Rants
 

Day 4: I Think My Reserves Are Depleting

because I"m starting to get hungry? Whaa I thought this was supposed to be over Im pretty sure its head hunger, then again, I don't know because its been very hard to get anything down the past 3 days. Everytime I swallow, it hurts and I feel so much gas come back up each time. Does this go away? I'd hate to have to feel this for the rest of my life.   I don't know if it's the chewing I miss or just the taste of meat but it's starting to wear on me   I know they say your brain uses more energy when you are studying so I wonder if that is my problem right now.   Any suggestions?
Shemy-away

Shemy-away

9
sweetsoutherngirl's Blog
 

24 Days Post Op And Adjusting

I think I am adjusting pretty well. So far I have lost 12 pounds in the almost month since surgery. I have my first fill on 3/14. I still am feeling pretty good. I do not eat anymore than 1/2- 1 cup at a time and I always eat my protein first. Water is a bit of a struggle because I have to make sure that I drink it slow enough to not cause this overwhelming feeling of being super full. Mushies have been so great!! But honestly I am not looking forward to solids. The thought kinda scares me. I know I can not stay on soft food forever, but i just am not looking forward to regular food. And I will be back to liquid and mushies after I get my fill for a day or two, so I really will not have a chance to actually be on solids for long. Sigh....... I am enjoying not being focused on food and also I have learned the difference in between being hungry and just eating for the heck of it!   My mother is not really happy that I did this. She told me that between her and my brother that they thought I was being vain and it was not as though I was spilling out of my clothes and falling out of my seat. Well, I am never going to spill out of clothes, because I always have clothes that fit. But buying a size 24 in said clothes is not ideal. Oh and nevermind that I take meds for high BP for two years( I was able to stop those recently) or that my back, knees and feet were hurting all the time. My feet will swell at the drop of a hat due to the amount of walking I do and the weight I carry. I am only 37 years old and quite honestly I should not have these "old lady issues" So it hurt my feeling when she said it, but I just told her that I did this for me and my health. I can't place my health and expectations on no one but me.   I have been getting lots of compliments on how defined my face is looking. I looked in the mirror and it actually looked "skinny" to me!! I can not express how happy I am that I have made the choice to do this!
sweetsoutherngirl

sweetsoutherngirl

5
raven8888's Blog
 

Day 4, Them Bones, Them Bones!

March 10th, 2012   Yesterday they scheduled my endoscopy for Thursday, March 15th because they have to check for potential ulcers. I have been on NSAIDS (Advil) for a very long time in my life and take Omeprazole to prevent damage to my stomach. They want to make sure before we go ahead with surgery that everything looks okay inside. A bleeding ulcer would be contraindicated obviously. The last thing you want is to be bleeding after surgery. For this procedure and the surgery I have to stop all my intake of Advil indefinitely. As you may have read in previous entries, I have been running around on cloud nine the past few days. Well I have bad knees, ankles, hips, and shoulders. I woke up this morning with the worst joint pain I have had in years. I looked like a stiff mummy trying to come down my stairs this morning. I cannot take the Advil for it, only Tylenol. The Tylenol helps a little with the pain, but not the swelling. I assume once the weight starts to come off, the stress on the joints should reduce, hence the pain will hopefully reduce as well. I just have to be patient and endure this for a little while and hope for the best. My body is telling me to chill out a little bit today and stop trying to conquer the world in just one day. I'm going to listen to it.
raven8888

raven8888

3
DIAMOND45's SPIRITUAL INSPIRATION
 

" No Fear "

Good Morning To All,       Our Spiritual Vitamin today is A for: ANXIETY     1 Peter 5:7 says that we are to, "Cast all our anxiety on God because He cares for us."   Aniexty: A state of being uneasy, apprehensive, or worried about what may or may not happen.   Wow! If you are guilty of this at some time on a daily basis, then raise your "virtual hand!"   Anxiety, at its highest point, is like putting your "worry" on steroids! This is not good for your   heart, mind, or your spirit. As children of God we need to recognize that worrying is a sin against   our heavenly Father because He loves us and only wants the best for His children. Psalms 56:3   says, "when we are afraid, we will put or trust in the Lord." I know often it is easier said than done,   but it can be done. We need to humble and quiet down our spirits, and then through our love and   respect to God, go to Him in prayer and tell Him about the things that are our concerns, and when   we finish, thank Him for listening, leave those "issues" at His feet for good, and push on forward.   Those of us who are still waiting to be approved, or are on our pre-op liquids getting ready for our   surgery, are finding it hard not to worry. We are anxious if we will even be approved, how the surgery   will go, and if there will be any complications. Well, I would like to give this scripture to you all, as well   as myself: Romans 8:28 says, "All things work out to the good for those who love God, and are callled   according to His purpose!" So let us stop concentrating on "what could happen," and start meditating on   "what Gods is making happen!" Say this to yourself everyday, that " I am persuaded as your child Lord,   because of your merciful love for me, that you are able and willing to take care of all my concerns, and I tie   them up together, giving them to you Lord, and I will not be anxious on those anymore because I know that   the one who holds all power, has them in His hands."   You will be amazed at how calm you will begin to feel everyday. It really works for me!! I'm being sleeved on   March 15, and I'm going with God!   FOOD FOR THOUGHT: " LAUGHING TIL' IT HURTS, IS A PAIN WORTH HAVING!"     Diamond45
DIAMOND45

DIAMOND45

3
A Winning Loser with VSG
 

In The Beginning (My Current Story)

My name is Holly, I am 34 years young. I have three beautiful children (1 son, and twin daughters). I have been married to the love of my life for 11.5 years, and live in Orlando, FL. However, I grew up in Michigan, where most of my side of the family still resides.   In November of 2006 I had the lap-band placed. I weighed right around 290 lbs (my highest weight ever), and I am 5'6" tall. I did well in the beginning I lost a little over 60 lbs. In retrospect I do not actually think the band played the largest roll in that loss. Right after having the band placed that year was a hard year in terms of illness for our family. My children were very young at the time and during a 6 month period we had several different stomach/intestinal bugs, that I was lucky enough to keep on catching. It seemed as though every other week I was down and out and couldn't keep anything down for days. For that reason I believe that having been sick caused a lot of my 60lb weight loss.   I did manage to keep the weight off for quite some time. Over the past 6 years I have gone from under 230lbs to today weighing 261lbs. I now have serious and severe issues with the band. I have developed GERD, which has also caused several cases of reoccurring pneumonia over the past 2.5 years, which recently has caused 2 hospital stays. Just a little over a week ago I had an EGD done, which showed that my esophagus is not pushing food down properly. Having fasted for well over 13 hrs, I still had food in my esophagus that was discovered during the procedure. STUPID band!   My GI doc as has recommended that I have the band removed, which I have wanted to do! My insurance will cover bariatric surgery (Praise The Lord!). After much, much research I have decided that I will have revision to VSG. I have two family members who had RNY, and though they did well at first and for quite some time afterwards, they did gain their weight back. But, my biggest concern is all the other serious side effects that comes with RNY. I do not want to deal with dumping, nor being able to absorb vitamins. I also need to be able to continue to take NSAIDs, which both family members were not allowed to do for some years following RNY Sx. I say this because I do have arthritis. Plus, RNY just seems too invasive for my taste, my main reason for having the lap-band placed. Though I am not happy with the lap-band I am happy that it is reversible, and can be removed   Next Friday I meet back with my GI doc to go over all the results for the EGD, and he said he will make a referral to a local bariatric surgeon.   My current goals are to meet with the bariatric surgeon before March is over, hopefully. And I am hoping that by April 2012 I will be able to have the removal of the band and then revised to VSG.
VSG 4 Me

VSG 4 Me

5
Taking Those First Steps
 

Wowzers!

Wednesday night was the Seminar on WLS. I found it very informative but also felt prepared after scouring this website so much! There was about 10 people there, the WLS Coordinator spoke first then one of the three Bariatric Surgeons. I was actually a little let down, I had gone in so stoked about the Lap Band, and the surgeon that came actually disliked Bands and much preferred the Sleeve or Bypass over Bands ("difficult to balance, very easy to put in, very low risk BUT highest failure rate with post-op weight loss).   After the seminar I introduced myself to the coordinator and we chatted for a moment about my insurance (I asked if I could fax back in the paperwork instead of mail - again, I'm Type A, tell me to do something I get it done, and I want it finished NOW). She asked more specifics on my plan and when I filled her in that I had UHC through my husbands employer, and who that was, she was ecstatic! She said she had already approved 3 patients that worked for his employer this year, and the insurance was an absolute dream to work with. She said to fax in my paperwork ASAP, she would get it done the next day.   I came home FULL of info, got my paperwork filled out and faxed in the next morning (Thurs.). Cathy (WLS Coordinator) called that night about 6:30 and said that I completely met their criteria, it was VERY basic criteria, and they've given me pre-approval! She locked in my benefits, 20% co-insurance after my deductible (which I've almost met) and out of pocket max of $6000, which by the time surgery rolls around it should cost me only about $1500-$2500 out of pocket, then EVERYTHING will be covered the rest of the year since I will have met my max!   So now...appointments! There are about 20 steps before surgery. Tomorrow I have to have 13 lab tests done. On March 21st I have my 4 hour appt with the Dietician/Internal Medicine/Surgery Coordinator/Physical Educator, then the following week I have two appointments set up for my Psych Evaluation.   The timeline said to allow 2-3 weeks for insurance pre-approval and I got it in one day. I still need authorization, which comes right before surgery when I've done EVERYTHING and am ready to go, but Cathy said it should be a breeze.   I'm excited for the whole thing. 539 question psych test? Yay! Two weeks of skim milk pre-op? Bring it on!   Projected surgery date is mid-May/early-June. I've got to kick some butt fast afterwards because I have my best friends wedding in September and plan on looking astonishing.
jen_1381

jen_1381

5
bbbanded chronicles
 

-3 More

Lost 3 more lbs, two more months and then surgery! I used to have these "pockets" of fat under my boobs, I'm young I can say boobs, and they're gone!! My calves are getting toned, theres an indent in the side! My back is smoothing out! My face is slimming down! haha Sorry, just really excited. My skin is lightening and my cycle came by it self this month! I wanted french bread pizza today, two slices, saw it was 470 calories for one, said nope! had turkey bacon, an egg with egg whites, and weight watchers toast.   I don't think I've ever felt so good!
bbbanded

bbbanded

6
Rhapsody's Rants
 

Day 3

Soooooo it's day 3. It's also the last weekday of my spring break and I've done absolutely NOTHING LOL. Back to the surgery. I'm officially post-op. The surgery went very well. Passed the leak test, started my liquids, discharged yesterday. I thought I was prepared for it all. I've had a c section before, I read the forums, blogs, but nothing prepares you for this. The pain is different. My pain was constant. Its not just the incisional pain, its the gas and acid!   It was very hard for me to walk my first day. I was on a dilaudid PCA and I would fall asleep at the drop of a hat, but I tried anyway. The walking does help. Walk, walk, walk!   I overpacked. I couldn't even tell you everything that was in my bag, but I can tell you what I would not have made it without: 1. My heating pad 2. Gax-x strips 3. phone 4. tampons 5. wipes for the ladyparts 6. small pillow to splint your stomach   I'm trying to get all of my fluids in. It's a full time job I tell ya. I try to remind myself to sip and Keep a bottle of something close to me at all times. Slowly but surely i'm getting it in. Whelp, it's time for the good ol' pain meds again, so I will keep you guys posted on my progress!
Shemy-away

Shemy-away

6
On My Weigh Down
 

Five Weeks Down! Still Amazed....

Today marks the begining of my sixth (6th) week back on track. Still can't believe that I had this restriction all the time and was not allowing it to do its job! Still keep wondering if its just willpower. Still amazed at how often hunger really happens in our heads! Today was extremely easy, the easiest day I've ever had when it comes to eating! I had absolutely no appetite an now I truly understand what it means to eat to live.   I now eat insanely small amounts of food and feel satisfied. I try to average the necessary calories per week for a 2-3lb loss per week. I can and do eat(or sometimes taste) most foods that I want to. Some days I go as high as 1100 cals and others I go as low as 600 (protein shake days).   I have lost 4lbs this week. YAAAAY!!! I weighed in at 315 this morning and that's 20lbs loss since I re-started my journey on 3rd Feb '12, which originally began in 2008 with me weighing in at 352lbs. I have lost 37lbs overall!!!   I am down from size 26 dress to a snug-fitting 22 in the five weeks. I am still receiving complements, the degree of which depends on how long ago the complementee (word? lol) has seen me.   My major goal for this month is to get my BMI below 50... even if its 49.99 lol. I am pretty close cause it's now 50.8. Also I have started to exercise. I have pledged to myself to walk at least 15 minutes a day everyday, even if it kills me! lol I have been keeping my pledge since last Saturday. YAAAY!!! lol   Till next time..... I continue on my weigh down!
ovahkummer

ovahkummer

4
Lyra's Canto
 

Overwhelmed, Tired, And Happy

Yesterday was my support group class...the last class before it goes to insurance for approval. It was interesting and overwhelming and scary. There are so many vitamins and minerals and nutrients you have to remember to take, and I think I'm going to try and get some free samples of protein drinks. Has anybody tried the 'Nectar' brand before? They're running a special right now on samples. It really just hit me that the journey to surgery is almost over. I need to sit down and write down what I need to take everyday so that I can wrap my mind around it.   Yesterday was a hard day because I got up at 4am and was at work until 1pm. Then I drove the 3 hours to my meeting, had dinner with my absolutely WONDERFUL mother, went to the meeting, and then I drove 3 hours BACK home. By the time I got home at midnight I was actually shaking in my seat and couldn't walk straight because I was so exhausted. I can't take the energy drinks because I had a little espresso addiction and it about killed my stomach. Today has been hard...but only two more days of work until a day off! Yah!   My mother is absolutely wonderful. She has been with me every step of the way and it has been awesome. I never think of my mom as getting old, half the time I forget that I'm about to turn 30 this year. Yet at dinner last night I saw my mom's beautiful hands and how rheumatoid arthritis is causing them to bend and warp. It makes me so sad and I wish I could spend more time with her. Luckily I'm recuperating at my parent's house so that's 2 weeks of togetherness. I'm sure by the end of it both of us will be glad for some separation!   So...yeah, overwhelmed. I feel like I have this big ball of emotion that sits behind my breastbone. It wasn't there a couple of weeks ago, but as I get closer and closer to game time, it gets bigger. I'm not thinking about backing out, nor am I unhappy. I think it's this weird conglomeration of nerves, fear, excitement, worry, happiness, with a big dose of "dear god!". Mountain meet molehill. *rolls eyes*.   Everything will be fine but the waiting is driving me nuts!
Lyra

Lyra

2

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