As a social worker I have counseled many different types of people. I have counseled teenagers (my favorite), young children, addicts, adults, families, relationships (well the people in them), and just about any other type of person you can think of. I facilitated one on one sessions as well as group sessions and I loved both. However, I did enjoy facilitating group counseling the most. Seeing the dynamics of a group and watching it come together to help everyone involved in the group is an amazing thing. I have also always been a true believer that group counseling works becasue people listen to others who are going through or have been through the same issues they are going through. As a counselor, it's not really professional for me to tell clients what I've experienced personally but in a group setting, once trust is developed, the pure honesty that comes from the participants is better than any counseling I can give one on one...no matter how good I am at my job...and trust me, I'm good!!! LOL
Now, after reading that, I am sure you will find it comical that I have never been a fan of group counseling for myself. Leading the group is one thing but being part of the group and being completely open and honest with people I don't know is something far different. It falls in the "Do as I say, not as I do" category. Now, mentally I know group therapy works. I know it's far better than any one on one counseling session. But I still have never been able to bring myself to be part of a group counseling session for any reason. This is why when my doctor gave me a schedule for the local weight loss surgery groups in my area I politely smiled, said "thank you" and then gently placed it in the the garbage can when she left the room. I'm a very strong woman and the thought of being in a group listening to people cry over not being able to eat that candy bar, or better yet, eating the candy bar that they bought (even though they KNEW it was bad for them) is not on the top of my list of fun ways to spend an evening. This journey is tough enough that I don't need to hear people wine every week about their cravings. We all have cravings....we all know how to deal with them....either find something else to do or give into it. If you chose to give into it DO NOT CRY over the melted chocolate and stringy caramel that is now smeared all over your face. Trust me, tears and melted chocolate DO NOT mix well. I know that from personal history. Add ice cream to the mix and you just have a big ole mess and no one wants ice cream with tears in it. The tears take away the pure sugary taste and add salt....not good I tell you (again, personal experience) I know I sound mean and rude, and I don't mean to. I am just being honest about how I feel about these things. If I offended anyone, please hear me out before you write me a hateful comment.
With all that out there, I still believe we all need some type of support to help us through this. If groups work for you than that is great. I know they work for many people and can be used as an amazing tool. If you get enough support from your family and friends then you are very lucky as many things I've read on this site have shown me that many families aren't supportive (even significant others who seem to almost work against the person who is going through this life change). I have been very lucky. I have great friends and an amazing family and husband that have given me more support than anyone could ask for. They are all great at seeing the weight loss and noticing the changes in my food choices. But, and this is a BIG but, they don't REALLY understand what it's like to go through this EVERY day. They don't understand the mental lashing we give ourselves if we didn't make it to the gym, or if we went over out calorie goal for the day (even if we only went over by 20 calories). And let's be honest, sometimes the ones closest to us just don't know how to say the right thing (as shown below)
Being overweight, we become very good at mentally abusing ourselves. No matter how big the smile on our face is, it's only hiding the constant negative thoughts bouncing around the rubber room known as the brain. "Why did I eat that?" "You're never going to lose weight", "Maybe I supposed to be fat since I haven't lost anything in a month".....and so many more. Some of the inner attack thoughts can get so bad that we end up sobbing only to tell anyone who asks that we're crying due to PMS. I mean who wants to admit to anyone (especially the people we love the most) that the surgery was the easiest part....it's the mental stuff that will take so much longer to overcome than the learning to eat properly.
So, being of semi sound mind and body, I have to admit....I found my own type of group counseling, and it works great for me!!! I am on Myfitnesspal.com and though it took me awhile to ask for "friends", I am so glad I did. It's amazing what having a group of people who are going through EXACTLY what I'm going through has done for me. Seeing others with the same thoughts and the same concerns makes me feel not as crazy. Also, having people who know how difficult this is, cheering you on for ever little step, is amazing. I truly feel as though I have found my "sisters in weight loss". They build me up when I'm having a bad day, they listen and answer questions (no matter how far out there), and I do the same for them. Having these relationships that are truly 50/50 has made this process so much easier. It's made me feel not as alone or misunderstood. I enjoy logging in to the site to log in my food intake and seeing how others are doing on their journey. I love reading their positive reinforcements that they leave for others and for me. I love being able to give them the same type of positive reinforcement. I love having support!!! It's even better when the support is better than any I've found from a bra since my surgery. No matter how hard I try, these suckers need more than an under-wire and some positive reinforcement from me to stay up and at attention. (Sorry for the side bar)
So, it's official, I'm a changed woman. I have found to love the one thing I was never a fan of (for me). By being open to it, I have made some great new friends and I feel like this people have my back...no matter how big or small it is. They are all amazing people who are doing exactly what I am....trying to get healthy and lose weight....and if in the process I meet some great new people....well, that's just a wonderful bonus and that's one dish I'll go back for seconds for every time!!!!
I've had a body composition analysis done recently.That showed that my bodyfat percentage will only start going into normal when I weigh 154.It took me 2 weeks of chewing on this but today I decided to lower my goal from 165 to 154.This might be why I still wear such big clothes.Size 18 (UK) and 16 US.
No use stopping before I am really there,right?
Will have to up the exercise again a little as I have become a bit lazy again since I stopped the running.I still think having an exercise buddy keeps you responsible for getting up and going to the gym.Mine isnt speaking to me anymore (I was mean to her after my sleeve and didnt realize she took it so personal until it was too late,sad but what to do about it now?Must confess I was mean to many people in the first 2 months post sleeve as I was very depressed but the others are all still around and had the insight to know I was going through a heck of a tough time,they've all forgiven me and her having had the sleeve,well.....) I should try and find someone else now!
Its weekend here and food is a challenge as I dont cook over weekends and we socialize and eat out quite some over the weekends.I am busy making a super high fibre meatloaf,YES its possible..lol..quite low in calories and very low in carbs.This will be my go to this weekend when I feel like snacking.
The weather is beautiful so it is a beach weekend!
I now know the agony of being stuck! Ouch! Chicken breast is not my friend any longer!
I am embracing this stuck episode knowing after 3 fills I am much closer to the green zone!
I did slip my dancing shoes on while at the Texas State Fair last week. I nicely created two separate scenes while randomly dancing with my daughter and friends. The second time the police came over to break the crowd up that was watching us. It was AWESOME
http://tinkrisegrind.blogspot.com/2012/10/that-was-hard-10-pounds-found-my.html
I'm not a good wait-er. I never have been. In fact, my impatience may be one of my defining characteristics. And when I set my mind on something, I become extremely focused on it. This can be really useful, except when it has to do with something that I feel I have very little control over. And that brings me to my progress toward WLS.
And yes, I know, I actually have lots of control. My insurance requires 6 months of pre-surg diet and exercise counseling, and I am now 3 weeks away from my last appointment. In the coming weeks I'll have my psych-eval, I'll meet with my surgeon, and I'll have a diet/exercise class. Then, around November 10th, they'll submit my information to insurance. I'm doing everything that they want, but I know that's not always enough.
The thing is, during this pre-surg period, I haven't lost anything. In fact, I've gained a little. Right after my first month, I put on 6 pounds. Bam, there it was, even though I was working out and watching what I was eating. But that's the way my body has always been. I seem to have gotten that under control and now I'm heading in the right direction, but I'm going to be struggling to get back under that 248 mark for the next appointment. I'm exercising regularly and trying to stay under 1200 calories a day, so hopefully I get there. I just hope that the insurance company sees it as being enough.
I've started this process three times now. Here's how it's gone so far
1. I spent 3 months in early 2011 going to classes and meeting with my doctor. I even had my psych eval and met with my surgeon. At that point I was 263. Then, during one of many discussions with the insurance people at the office, we realized that I didn't meet criteria because I needed a BMI of 40+ for at least 3 years. This had only been 2. Extremely frustrated, I abandoned the idea and decided to go it alone. (With Nutrisystem. That didn't last long-- I lost 14 pounds that came right back on as soon as I stopped eating their food. I could only stomach/afford it for three months.)
2. One year later, I decided to start the process again. I learned that everything I had done the year before didn't count (I assumed as much) but my 150 dollar deposit would carry over. Two months in, the same insurance person in the office told me that my insurance was redoing their criteria and that it would not be in my favor. Frustrated and very sad, I decided that this was not in the stars for me. I spent 400 dollars to get hypnotized in June of 2012. It didn't work. I'm still fat.
3. In July, out of frustration, I contacted the WL Center again just to make sure that I understood exactly what the new criteria actually is. To my surprise, I found a new person was doing the insurance information for the office, and she seemed to have a better handle on what was going on. In fact, it turns out that I could have continued last spring because the insurance changes were actually IN MY FAVOR. So in August I started the six month process again.
4. Now, last week, I found out that I actually get to count the two months of D/E counseling that I did this spring, meaning that I am two months closer to my surgery than I expected. But that also means that I have less time to lose the weight that I gained at the beginning this time.
I have an appointment tomorrow for a Diet and Nutrition class, and I hope to sit down afterwards and go over all of this with the new gal and make sure it looks okay. I get it all comes down to this: My hopes have been dashed so many times so far that I feel like it's not going to happen. And I don't feel like I can talk to anyone about this because they just don't understand.
But I guess I just need to stay positive. I can't control it, but I can control how I feel in the coming weeks. I guess it would be silly to let my worrying ruin the coming weeks. So, I'm currently accepting any positive energy that anyone is willing to send my way.
It's been six months since my doctor removed 85% of my stomach. Since then, I haven't had any regrets...unless you take in consideration the thought that went through my head when I woke up while they were removing my breathing tube. But I don't count that since I was all drugged up and not thinking straight. Also, having Nurse Hatchet didn't help matters. However, with fall here and winter around the corner, I have to admit, there are a times I miss it a little. Not much, only a little bit. Like, I wish I had 25% of my stomach instead of 15%. Now, before you all go jumping on my back allow me to explain.
Tonight for dinner I made homemade chicken and dumplings. Now, that's bad enough for a sleever but I had to add more temptation to the mix. I had to make corn bread from scratch as well. I mean come on, you can't have one with out the other. It's just not Southern!!!! No self respecting Southerner would make chicken and dumplings with out making cornbread. And, though I'm not quite Southern...I'm below the Mason-Dixon line, so I'm close enough. LOL Also, I started feeling bad for my husband. Since my surgery, his diet has consisted of PB&Js and chicken. Not at the same time. But considering he's a meat and potato man, it's been a hard six months for him. He considers it a treat if I stop at McDonald's for him. Which is VERY hard for me as the smell has always turned my stomach but after surgery it's even worse.
So, I decided that if I were going to make him eat chicken again, I would make something he enjoys. I thought I would be fine with it. I know I can have about 1/4 a cup (a little less) of the chicken and dumplings (mostly chicken...maybe one or two dumplings) and maybe a bite of two of the cornbread. The problem is, I had forgotten how much I love both of these things. This is one thing my tastes buds did not change their opinion of....which isn't a good thing. Why couldn't they find both as disgusting as they find Whey protein? Or better yet, like Whey protein and hate the other?
So, after a little nibble of cornbread (a very little nibble), I wanted to eat the whole pan! This is the first time in six months that I've wanted to just gorge myself. Then, top it off with the chicken and dumplings and I actually had the thought of, "Man, I wish I had my stomach right now!" WHAT??? Why am I thinking thoughts like this? I know I won't over eat any of this yummy stuff in my kitchen but the thought of, "I would if I could", crossed my mind more than once.
Now, the reason I find this so strange is that I have always been a carb fanatic. I loved bread and pasta. I could eat a whole loaf of fresh baked bread in one sitting with no bad feelings. However, since surgery, I haven't really craved either things. Don't get me wrong, there are times I will have a little less than a 1/2 slice of wheat bread, toasted, with some type of protein but most times, i don't even think about it. That was not the case today. Those simple carbs wanted me and I have to admit, I wanted them. The attraction is still there despite how far we have both moved on with our lives.
So, with all this said, it's a good thing I only have 15% of my tummy. Because no matter how good either look, smell or taste....I wouldn't give up my 100+ pound weight loss for either things. That doesn't mean I can't dream about them...and how yummy a big bowl of chicken and dumplings and two or three slices of homemade, buttery cornbread would taste.....yes, I can dream and lose weight or I can eat and slime and possibly stretch my tummy out. I'll take that dream and weight loss any day of the week and twice on Sundays.
So readers, have you had anything like this happen to you yet? I think for me it has more to do with fall and winter coming and what I consider "comfort" food. All the warm, cheesy, gooey, stick to your ribs (and add pound after pound to your weight) has always been one if not the only good thing about a cold winter day. Looks like I'm going to have to find something else to take it's place....let's just hope it's not more chicken. I think my husband will finally leave me if I don't come up with something new for us to eat. I swear if he found a woman who cooked like I used to, he'd be a little tempted to cheat on me just for the food. Just kidding....I know he would never do it JUST for the food. LOL
This week has been tough, lots of bad news, sickness and it just has been non stop!
Frankly I'm almost afraid to think about the next day *sigh*
The thing is that I was an emotional eater, and still may be since that may be something we don't get rid of, we may just learn to make better choices.
Instead of eating too much I'm barely eating at all, a couple of days I've ad just a handful of Almonds, or a Protein shake...yeah, all day.
I know it's bad for me, but with everything I have going on in my head I just cannot even think about eating, the little bites I've had are just so I don't pass out.
Not that what I'm doing is a good thing, but at least I am not stuffing my face with anything and everything around me.
I used to look sideways at the girls who said "I'm too upset to eat" but, now I know what that's like.
I will get back on track, and I do plan on eating a sensible meal tonight even if I have to make myself do it.
Life has ups and downs, with and without a band...life just keeps on going and changing.
Since the 13th I have lost another 3 pounds for which I am very happy.
But today I had a fat day.Where I am not satisfied with my weight loss so far and I wished I could just enjoy anything I ate like I did before the sleeve.Silly really as I would allow myself "anything" if only I knew what that was.
I dont find pleasure in food anymore.It is not fun to eat anymore.But then my little kid tells me that eating is not fun.It is nice to eat good food but it is not fun.Fun is stuff that you do,like swimming or dancing or playing a game...lol.And she is right.
And maybe I feel like this because Im getting a cold again OR
Or maybe it is because of this skinny woman at my kid's gymnastics who never speaks to me, that for some reason tonight, decided to loudly and in front of everybody say,O you've lost so much weight.I can even see it in your face now.Are you following a specific diet? To which I answered,yes very specific...lol
Whereupon she said, o its very hard but its got to be done! In front of everybody!!!
And goodness knows why that got to me so badly.of course everyone comments on the weight loss but this was just embarrassing for some reason.The be-atch in me wanted to say to her and maybe if you changed that horrid hairstyle of yours you would look so much better too.Its very hard,but its got to be done! But I didnt.and I have never been too sensitive about what others would say,goodness as a fatty Ive had to bite my tongue a few time in my life when people would make comments.So whats up with me now?
Crazy thing is whereas I was just thinking about food today,I came home and actually had a packet of weight watchers crisps which I dont even like.So Ive been thinking of how I need to get over myself and toughen up a bit.I cannot let peoples comments get to me.Since we have this big family reunion in December (my housemate's family not mine) and boy are they a bunch of rattlesnakes (hehehe...she doesnt want to go if we dont go with her) of course they will make their snarky comments.I can bet top dollar that the extra skin on my arms will be mentioned a few times and my eating this little will be critized now,I have to not allow myself to eat "away" what I feel.Maybe,just maybe I should for once say these quick comebacks that come up in my head out loud.That might just shut people up.But I wont,because I am not like them.
I suppose this is life and a good nite's sleep might just give me back my perspective.And tomorrow I might have a thinner day!
!
I have been banded a little over two years and so much has happened on this journey! I have learned so much about this band, and I still continue to learn things about having a band. One of my newest experiences was about three weeks ago when I could not get anything to go down and every thing I put into my mouth was getting stuck. I did not know what in the world was going on because I had not gotten a fill in over nine months or maybe longer. I was always told that the band could not readjust itself, but that is so far from the truth from my own personal experiences. I was told the band is a little tighter earlier in the mornings and after lunch I should be able to eat well as long as it was chewed "well"! (not always so true for me)
Right before I started experiencing my stuck episodes- I had a really bad sinus infection and I wasn't aware how much post nasal drainage I was having. The drainage caused my esophagus to swell around my upper stomach where the band is connected. The more I tried to eat different foods and vomiting the more irritated and swollen my esophagus around my band area became. I lost a quick 20 pounds in two weeks before I really realized it. I was so focused on the daily stuck episodes and trying to figure out what was going on wrong with my band. Now someone may ask, "Why in the world I didn't see my WLS". Well he had moved 4 1/ hours away and I did not want to make that trip feeling so awful unless I had no other choice. Therefore, I scheduled an appointment with a gastroenterologist and he ordered labs for barium swallow. A day after the barium swallow everything had gone back to normal. Unknown to me all of the post nasal swelling had gone down and my band was back to its appropriate restriction level. If that's the correct way of saying it. I have also learned that a week before my "M" cycle my band appears to be more restricted until my cycle has ended. I have also identified that my band is also more restricted when my body feels stress! These things were something I had to learn due to my life experiences with living with my band. Each person's experiences with their band is not always going to be text book or similar to someone else. Each day I learn a little more about life with a "BAND"! Please know that every single day is not going to be the same. Each person will achieve a different level of success- but it does not mean someone else is a failure compared to others. It only means each banded person is a little different and unique! LOL (learn to work “your band”)
Each day I work so hard mentally, emotionally, and physically never to become that same person I left behind two years ago and counting……… I had walked three miles while watching Netflix last night before I had realized how long I had walked. I could not believe it! Two years ago- the old me would have pasted out within the first 15 minutes of walking. That was a big victory for me last night and I now understand how much my weight has held me back from a lot of things.
I remember me "then" but I focus on me "now"! I am down a total of 90 pounds and counting.
It is in our human nature to compare one thing to the other. We do it from the time we are kids- remember with siblings- he got more than me thing. We start compairing early.
By the time we reach school age we are compairing clothes, looks, ect with our classmates. And you always hear he's/she's not as cute as xyz. Then we begin compairing ourselves to others- her hair is prettier than mine, she has more friends than me, she has nicer clothes, ect. Our self esteems are molded some what by these compairsons.
I know for certian mine were. I have always felt like the ugly duckling. I have been large since 5 years old. In school I was picked on and it got worse in middle school. I hated being fat, but all that hate just drove me to the nearest donut, which intern made me fater.
Now that I am taking control of my life and have had lapband and am losing weight, the compairsons do not end. Chances are all of us have compared our self to another member of this forum- either boy I am glad I am not them they aren't losing much weight- or - it's not fair she is losing more weight than me. It's just in our nature.
I have compared myself to others several times and gotten down and out. Some people are really rocking it.
I talked to my nutritionist about this and she had some great throughts.
1- Body weight percentage has to been taken into account- those with more to lose will lose quicker.
2- Life style - some people have jobs that are more active than others and we can't control that- most of us need to work and have to do what we do. Some people can't due to health reason work out where others can.
3- Muscle mass- some people scale wise appear to not be losing, but are losing fat because they are working out and building muscle that weighes more than fat- this is a great thing because the more muscle you have the more fat your burn.
4- responsiblity- it is sometimes our own fault when we aren't losing- we CHOOSE to eat high calorie foods that just slide down, we CHOOSE not to be active, we CHOOSE not to follow doctors orders
This conversation with my nutritionist made me feel better. She said that when I compair myself to another person I need to look at these things. If I am doing everything I am suppose to do then I have no need to belittle myself. The bottom line is at the end of each month the scale trend in going down, therefore I am successful for me!
I hope that I can stop compairing myself to others, but if I happen to I will take these things into account before I let the bad thoughts drive me to a mouth full of krispy creme.
Height: 5'9
Highest Weight: 216
1st Goal Weight: 169
Sleeved: (8/17/2012): 216 lbs
Week 1 (8/24): 204.8 (-11.2)
Week 2 (8/31): 200.6 (-4.2)
Week 3 (9/7): 196.8 (-3.8)
Week 4 (9/14): 193.5 (-3.3)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 9/17/12- 1 Month Anniversary w/Pics Posted in Blog
Week 5 (9/21): 191.6 (-1.9)
Week 6 (9/28): 190.1 (-1.5)
Week 7 (10/5): 187.0 (-3.1)
Week 8 (10/12): 181.9 (-5.1)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> 10/17/12- 2 Month Anniversary
**While it doesn't look like I'm getting a ton of definition, I'm actually "de-swelling" pretty evenly and not all from one spot. Everything has shrunk from a size 14 (*cough* more like a 16 *cough*) pre-op to me fitting into my size 10 jeans. I never took measurements, but my clothing is pretty much telling the story for me. And the shorts I'm wearing in my 2 month pic wouldn't even go up my thighs 2 months ago- total NSV and now my favorite pool deck lounging booty shorts. I'm still swimming 5 days a week, and I'm getting really close to my first personal goal of 169, which is the highest allowable weight according to my BMI chart. In 2 weeks I got Halloween, and in 3 weeks my Birthday. I'm really stepping it up in workouts and extra stuff just so that I can be prepared to take pics with friends and be happy, and actually smiling in all my pics. I'm ready for pics with friends finally!!!
OMG today is the day. I am going to be having surgery in 3 hours. It's so crazy that the day has finally arrived and in a few hours my new life is going to start and I can begin to set all my goals that I will now be able to achive when I wasn't before. Sea world and Disneyland being my first goals. I can't wait to take my little girl to Disneyland. She has been waiting forever and mommy had to keep telling he next year honey in hopes that I would lose the weight and be able to walk around the park. Now I can offically say that April 2013 or 2014 we WILL be going to Disneyland and it will be the best time ever. I can't wait. Well everyone wish me luck.I am off to the hospital. Bye Bye for now :-)
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People is probably the only creatures shoes spirit long. Person's life to wear how many pairs of shoes are afraid to statistics. Discard the old ones feet in the shoes and make a short "marriage". So the foot always "the wife qie large groups", and shoes for foot is the most loyal, it with various size and design under foot all oppression and suffering realize its significance and value. It provides protection for feet, comfortable and beautiful life course, from new become old, by good becomes bad, threw it until. This kind of willing to sacrifice the exclusive "love" compared with feet "skittish", no doubt very great noble. And who is put forward to the foot "moral judgment"? XieHang road on feet. On the ground of clearly is shoes print, but in the language education in words but it happened like this description: "the footprints of life",jimmy choo ugg 5838
"life's footprint" greetings. Shoes in obscurity, foot captation has become a "through the ages JiYuan".
Someone once straw sandals chuang world, someone once cloth shoes and poor. But these from we have long or very rare, life of ease and rich encourages the feet high. Pedicure, wash feet and so on for the foot health and beauty investment has become a fashion, Feet to the shoe choice more picky, the pursuit of high-grade shoes at spend money extravagantly; To eliminate the fatigue of the foot, the car instead of walking is only a low demand. The luxury car rare more exquisite, and foot has little joy dry patronage those hard place, is keen to go to beer and skittles place set foot. And reluctant to leave. People's feet there are always countless shoes in the relay, until people dead, it is also an indispensable funerary object, with feet into the crematorium or into the grave. Foot more and more effeminacy. More and more functional degradation, more and more corruption! Therefore, whenever we once again to take off her boots or, should be in awe of shoes.3161 ugg silver classic short sparkles boots
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Hi my name is Kelly and I am 33 years old. I am having a Rouxen-Y on October 19, 2012. I am so nervous and excited. I started this process back in Febuary. I guess I thought it would take a long time. But my experience has been very different. It seems to gone very fast. Don't get me wrong I am happy about this just need to take a few deep breaths. This journey has not been without a couple bumps in the road which included a broken ankle and wrist. I am finally out of the walking boot and I trip and fall and break my wrist( so please excuse any typos still have a cast on). So to make a long story short I get my cast of Thursday the 18th. Then I meet with my surgeon for my preop appt and then with the life coach. ALL on Thursday!!!! Then Friday is the big day!!!
Soooo tomorrow is the big day. I am going to have my gastric bypass surgery. I don't even know what my emotion is. I feel kind of numb at this point, like it really isn't happening. I don't know it is a weird feeling. I am anxious to get through all the painful parts that I know are coming after a surgery like this and get on with my new life. I can't wait to start losing and feeling more energy. This is going to be an amzaing journey. Surgery is at 7:30 am so I have to be there at 5:30am which I am not that excited about the early morning but that means I will be the first one in for surgery so the surgeon should be in tip top shape, LOL... Well wish me luck guys. Please keep your fingers crossed that I will come out ok and everything will go smoothly. I have a little one at home who needs her mom so every crossed finger is well appreciated. Bye Bye for now!
My husband is with me, I have my beautiful packing list that I developed from this forum (thanks!) all with me, and I’m ready. I have my health care proxy, made videos for my loved ones in case of anything, and was ready. At 10:20am, I went under the knife.
I’m not really sure what time I woke up, but I think it’s around 3, because my husband was going to pick up my daughter from school. I’m a little groggy, but I don’t feel any pain. Yay! My mouth is dry, but the nurse brought me a swab for my mouth. My hubby tells me that the nurse came to ask me a bunch of questions and he had to answer because I kept falling asleep. Oh well. I don’t remember much from the rest of the day. That night I did have a little nausea, and a little bit of discomfort. I wouldn’t say pain, but discomfort. But I have a ridiculously sensitive gag reflex, and did throw up a little bit that night. Strange feeling.
The next day, I was feeling a little more alert, and my hubby was with me for the day, although I still slept a lot. They brought me the little cups of isopure. I didn’t like isopure much before the surgery, and certainly didn’t like it much afterwards. But I could also drink water. My surgeon said that for the first week I needed to focus on fluids. We would worry about protein later. It was nice to have 1 thing to focus on instead of 100. So, I drank water, some isopure, and had a delightful cream of chicken soup. And walked. I did 3 laps that day, 990 feet, and felt great still. No more discomfort, except for some gas. Yay warm compresses! They took my catheter off, which was kind of sad. It was nice to not have to worry about going to the bathroom. I know that sounds weird, but hey, that’s what I was thinking. It was nice to not have to carry the lovely catheter bag with me on my walks. J
So, I am “eating” ok, drinking ok, feeling pretty good. My husband leaves and brings my daughter to visit. She wasn’t interested in the hospital, and after giving me a hug and kiss, she wanted to leave. I got to watch all the tv I could stand, and got caught up on my hgtv shows. Had a good night, and the next day I knew was most likely going to be my return to the real world day. I was excited, but nervous about having to remember everything I needed to do.
So, on Oct. 11, I did a few walks, visited with my very nice roommate, and just got ready to go. They cleared me to leave at 3, which is of course shift change, so I left at 4. Still feeling good, no pain, although the incisions hurt if I touched them, but that’s obviously going to get better. Drove home, and the real adventure begins! I weighed myself that first night home (holy cow, I had missed my comfy bed!), and I was down to 314.
Been a rough few days around here. Friday was the type of day that made me realize I'm really not a young kid anymore. You watch the generation ahead of you deal with the struggles of their own mortality and reality sets in that there is nothing you can do to change the cycle of life. All you can do is try and make the best of every situation and lend them a smile and cherish every moment you have with them...
Yesterday we said goodbye to my Uncle who lost his battle with brain cancer at the age of 68. He fought the good fight and remained optimistic right up until the very end. It was very hard to watch my Father come to terms with this and pay his respect. My Father and my Uncle have walked similar paths. My Father had part of his lung taken due to Cancer and when he was being treated for that they discovered he had bladder cancer. After months of preparation and chemo they took the bladder. He was pronounced Cancer free for a short time but the lung cancer came back and he is just now finished 6 weeks of chemo and radiation. Now we wait for him to heal up and let his body recuperate then they will do another scan and hopefully he will be clean of cancer. My Father had 7 brothers and he is now 1 of 3 that is left. I can't even begin to imagine how he feels.
So... I had my surgery over 2 years ago. I was at 225lbs when I had it and my lowest weight was 159. For a total of 66lbs. I really wanted to lose 80-100lbs but did not reach that goal, I was however happy breaking the 160 barrier which took me an additional 3 months to lose. Those were the hardest few lbs to lose I spent 2hrs at the gym 5 days a week and calorie counted. Needless to say it was tough and at times fun. I have 2 small children and their needs began surpressing mine, so out went the gym ...terrible I know. And then came the bad eating, we moved to a town where fat food is on every corner literaly! And I simply did not do to well. I have now gained 10lbs it keeps me up every night, that I let it come to this. I gained it over 6 months, saw myself going there but I justified by saying "I dont eat much anyway". I am now learning the hard way, not only is it how much you eat but what you eat. I'm trying to get back on the bandwagon and have eliminated red meat and trying to eliminated bread...baby steps. Hopefully I will force myself to find the time for "me" and get back in the gym. Has anyone had this experience? What have you done to help continue to lose weight. I was thinking of getting on Herbal Life but I havent looked to much into it yet, again baby steps. I actually came across this site while researching herbal life and sleeve patients. Any advice would help! Thanks for letting me vent, I actually fell better and I feel as if I finally have people I can talk to about this =)
I'm literally almost crying reading this. Mostly because I'mon this pre-op diet and these last two days have been difficult... but also because I needed this! Thank you! Congrats! And a BIG congrats on quitting smoking a second time! It was hard enough to do it once... So - when I say BIG congrats... I mean BIIIIIG congrats! ❤️
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