Why would an old BF, the first one, after 20+ years, contact me? He gave the reason of working late one night and thought he'd browse through a classmates.com looking for a name that looked familiar and low and behold there was mine!! Now, I've been in classmates for years and I think only 1 person has contacted me.

He called me at work (left a message) hoping that I was the woman he was looking for. It bothered me greatly - I should have ignored the message and he would have gone away. But I didn't.

We had a very rough relationship and it should have died with high school but it didn't. (keep in mind I graduated in 1985).

I asked him if somone died (we are getting older and these things do happend) or if he was going through AA and needed to make right all of his wrongs. He said that in a way it was like AA. He was diagnosed with a sleeping disorder that the drs said he most likely had as a child and became progressively worse as he grew older. sleep apnea? Don't know but any rate it effected his memory and his ability to make good decisions. He said he gathered how that since I didn't seem enthused about him calling that we must have ended badly.

Insult to injury here - he can't remember many things that happened between us and I can? At least he's been very kind with his appologies now - I sent him a to the point email explaining how I felt. If I were single now I'd NEVER alow someone to treat me that way.

And there's the crux. I'm not single & neither is he. I'm sharing this with my DH btw so I'm not keeping it hush hush. Still feels weird.

I know I'm being indirect here but what is this really about do you think? And why should I even be bothered after so many years - I wouldn't have even given any of this a second thought a week ago. The fact that it bothers me bothers me!!

BTW my male friends say its a pathetic attempt at sex.

Any kind words?:thumbup:

Midlife crisis, or one both my husband and I have dealt with.... People starting new careers that require them to contact large numbers of people! That was really offensive!