I just got banded on May 1st and things have been going good, but Im soooo sick and tired of people watching me like a hawk everytime I eat something and making comments like are you suppose to be eating that? are you suppose to be drinking that? have you lost any weight yet? I mean it is driving me NUTS!! And then I have a friend who I talk too a couple times a week and she's asking me how much weight have you lost? have you lost anymore? how much do they think your going to lose? I mean it's not going to happen overnight give me a freakin break!! I feel like Im under a microscope now and they expect some kind of transformation overnight! I dont know if anyone else has experienced this but I dont know how much more I can take before I snap!! I'm sorry but I just needed to vent! sheewww I feel a little better now LoL

I know how you feel. Not many people know that I had the surgery; only my mom, fiancée, and best friend and they make me crazy. The entire time I’m eating they watch me like a hawk, which makes me nervous, and constantly make comments like "are you ok?", "slow down", "are you sure you're ok?", "chew, chew, chew", "that looked like a big bite, are you ok?"... UGH! I know that they’re trying to help, but they really are driving me to the breaking point where I want to scream. I finally snapped at lunch today and yelled at my fiancée and told him he was making me a nervous wreck. I just can’t take it.

I also had my surgery on May 1, 2009 and am down 18.5 lbs but what I've noticed is that EVERYONE (and I do mean everyone) has an opinion. And for whatever reason they all feel inclined to share it. I had to tell my mother-in-law to speak only to her child (my husband) about my surgery. That way he got to field all the stupid questions and comments. The funny part is....within two days he told her to mind her own business and no wonder I was complaining about her driving me crazy. She didn't call us for a week and man it has never been so quite around here. It was a nice break, too bad its over now. :smile2:

OMG!!! You are telling my story...I am sick of tired of people asking me how much weight I have lost...I thought I was the only one...

There is a lot of misinformation out there regarding LB and GB. Everyone knows about the bypass because that is what the doctor's push in my area. Not so much the band. Therefore, most people just assume they are pretty much the same thing when in fact we all know they are not. I can't tell you the number of times I have heard "but so and so had surgery and they lost 10-20 pounds per month". Well, I am losing about 5 pounds per month. I would be losing more but I am not doing what I am supposed to be doing. So it is not the band, it is me. But that is another subject, another post. If I had to do it all over again, I would have kept it a much better secret. It was just hard with working for a small company. When I am missing, everyone knows it. Just keep on, doing the best you can, and stay on this site. There are a lot of very helpful people on here. And some that are not afraid to give you a kick in the backside when needed. Good luck.

I hear you thats why I have told very few people, I did not want them watching me. Hang in there when we get down there and start to look good they will have comments then too. It like if they focus on what your doing they don't have to look at themselfs!

Wow, I can relate to this BIG TIME! I'm a nurse and sometimes shifts are so busy that I can't find twenty solid minutes to sit and chew a full meal. I'm only five weeks out and, although I'm reaching bandster hell as far as no restriction, I do have to chew and eat slowly to avoid some things sticking. The other night I was incredibly busy. I'd been on my feet for six of my twelve-hour shift and was starting to feel a little light-headed. I decided, in desperation, to eat a pack of chocolate chip cookies from the vending machine because I knew they'd slide and I'd have some fuel to make it through 'til morning. I no sooner opened the bag when one of my co-workers gives me this disdainful look and says, "Can you eat those?" I tried to be nice. I answered, "Yes I CAN eat them. I SHOULDN'T eat junk, but unfortunately I don't even have time to chew tonight and these are the only things available to me that won't give me a rock in my chest." UGH! Like I need a babysitter. :thumbdown:

Wow...I can relate to every one of these posts. Live in a small town, work for a small business, and everyone KNOWS your business. Whenever I take off work my boss has to ask what I'm doing, and told him. Only missed 1 day and that was for surgery and consult. I told a couple of family members and now every time I see one they always ask how I'm doing, if I'm losing weight, and a few ask questions that can really irritate. You know, the stupid ones like "well if you just ate that way before you had surgery, you would lose the same amount". Ugh....

But I know (most of them) mean well, a few may be even interested in getting it done themselves, so I try to keep a positive attitude and not bite their heads off. If I can be a positive influence on someone, then so be it and I'll feel good about that. I have a lot of faith in the lap band and it's doing what it's supposed to be doing for me.

Let's all show them that this was well worth the money, pain, aggravation, frustration, and will power (to get thru pre-op and post-op) and be the people we should be - free from the prison of obesity.

:confused:

Sorry to hear what you are experiencing. Fear of this happening to me is one of the reasons I decided to keep my op a secret from everyone except hubby!

I did the same. Only my gf and 2 close friends knew I was going to do it. And that remains the same today.

I only told a few people, husband, mom and kids. Only three people at work know and I am so happy that's all . I'm three months out and when someone asks if I'm losing weight or whats my secret. I say working out and cutting out snacks, sweets and bread. I'm telling the truth. A guy in my office started a diet with 3 others and today when he was eating something, the manager said to him "Should you be eating that" He went into this long statement about, he did'nt have breakfast and he only had one. I felt so sorry for him and I told the girl thats sits next to me, that is why I'm glad no one knows. I don't want to be watched every minute at work.

To add something funny. Recently went to dinner with gfs parents. I ate salmon and veggies. They ate prime rib loaded baked potato, appetizers withpotato skins, cheese and bacon. Meanwhile I had lost 70lbs at that point. They are now both bigger than me and they proceeded to tell me what I should and should not eat.

I said, are you two kidding me?

I'm only 3 weeks out and maybe it's something I'll have to deal with in the future, but I have found the few people I've told to be overwhelmingly positive and supportive.

I think you have to look at people's motivations for asking you about your diet- is it

A- Mere curiosity?

B- Concern for your wellbeing?

C- Are they just being nosy and annoying?

Once you know WHY they're asking, you can respond accordingly.

A- Thanks, this is on my physician's allowed list of foods and if you'd like to know more about the lap band, just ask.

B- Thanks for your concern but I've had this before and have had no problems. I'll be fine!

C- Thanks for your input, I may be overweight but I'm losing more everyday, rudeness like YOU have just shown, on the other hand, can never be lost.

I know how you feel just the other day my mom said to me "I didn't think you were able to eat that much" mind you i only had 4 oz of chicken on my plate and a 1/4 cup of veggies. How much did you expect me to eat 3 peas? And i haven't even had my first fill yet. And every day someone is asking how much weight have i lost. If they ask me how much i have lost i just tell them i won't get on the scale only once a month at the doctors then the stop asking.

Edited June 13, 200917 yr by reneek

Tell them to shut the fuck up and mind their own business!

Sorry- I needed to say that.

This

My mother told me more times then I can count not to worry about what other people think. 42 years later it's sinking in.

Other possible answers would also be:

"I can eat whatever I want in moderation, that looks like a pretty big sandwich Bill, don't you thinks it's too big for you?"

"You have gained a few since Christmas, haven't you Jill?"

"Is that a spare tire I see Janice?"

"My, but your face is puffy today Dean--too much salt in those potato chips?"

and the proper answer to "How much weight have you lost" when coming from someone who is just being nosy and doesn't actually care how much you've lost is: "How much money do you make?" when they answer that question, you'll answer theirs

The out and out rudeness some of you people type about--parents, siblings and spouses saying these things???

A direct response is what they need, they are not helping, only hurting.

I live a small town. I had wanted to keep my surgery to myself. I told hubs this. I guess it went in one ear and out the other. The 'story' was supposed to be hiatel hernia repair. Well, hubs told everyone who asked that I was having WLS. He didn't do it out of spite or malice. He just didn't 'think' when he answered .... grrrr

but so far, everyone has been possitive

But I do like lipstix64's suggegestion to

"Tell them to shut the fuck up and mind their own business!"

i also made the mistake of telling a few close people in my life about my surgery, and now they drive me nuts! but even worse than that is that i live in a VERY small town so people talk, so i get those loaded questions like "so how are you doing?" where they have heard about the surgery but dont have the balls to say so hows the band going? another thing i get is also attributed to being in a small town is i go out to eat and i only eat a small amount and the waitress is asking if i liked the food, if it was prepared correctly, if im feeling ok.. etc. most of the time i feel like they dont believe me when i say it was fine im just not very hungry.