So I have been home a week and a half now and have not had a whole lot of desire for any sexual contact with my wife. This is very disconcerting for both of us since we were a 4 - 5 times a week couple.

Now my wife has slightly hurt feelings because she is worried that I think she is too fat for me now... I have assured her that this is not the case, but she is an ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS kinda gal.

I love my wife dearly and she is the sexiest woman I have ever been with. We are very computable in this area... VERY.

Frankly, it takes some effort to get *Uhm...* Well... READY....

Is this normal post-op (this was my first surgery ever)?

Is this normal for being on a liquid diet?

Anyone else experience this? C'mon guys I need to hear from you too.

-BSG

Bump...for the best thread ever.

I didn't feel well enough for sex for about 3 weeks....which was actually pretty great. My girlfriend was going crazy! By the time I was ready, she was a wild animal! It was like being a brand new couple again.

I had the opposite experience; I was the one banded and ready for some love after 2 weeks but DH was treating me like a fragile little doll...so we didn't consumate pots band :-) until 4 weeks post op!

I tried at the two week point and was sore for two days. After the third week all was well and with the weight loss things were much better.

I was good to go on about the 5th day. Just took it easy and was careful.

It took 10 days before DH and I got back to it. I was just way to sore, tired and worried I would open up an incission. Hubby was ok with waiting. Well we finally got to it today, had to be more careful due to incisions but I couldn't wait anymore and doc said go for it - if you feel like it. Just reassure your wife you still love her and the fella down there will wake up when it's time. Like someone else said - when the urge comes back she will be wild - just make sure she gets a lot of other affection in the mean time.

I told my dh it was restricted for 6 weeks but I'm hoping to feel up to it in 2 weeks when we celebrate our birthdays - figure it will be a good surprise! lol

Sex Update:

The Frequency is not quite back to normal. But the quality is.:drool:

It's funny being on the other side of "sorry hunny I am having cramps".

-BSG

I don't have a regular partner, but I can tell you that with all the emotional crap going on in my brain during pre-op diet and then post band, I could not feel less sexy and into it than ever. I think your wife is just feeling insecure, which is probably partly that you're not putting out at the moment, but also they say a lot of partners get anxious about what their partners will look like after banding, and feel insecure about if their partners get "hot and thin" they might leave them. Maybe that has something to do with it? Reassure her you will love her no matter what and that she's the sexiest woman alive etc etc.

ok bear, 4-5 times a week? Can you hang out with my husband, maybe it will rub off on him? lol...It will def take time, hang in there...

ok bear, 4-5 times a week? Can you hang out with my husband, maybe it will rub off on him? lol...It will def take time, hang in there...

Lately it is about 1 time per week - due to the band and stuff.

But when I was feeling better, we would try 3 or 4 times a week, and succeed maybe 2 or 3. It never fails, Close and lock the bedroom door and the kids (we have 4 from 17 to 4 years old) have all these issues that demand attention right then. Leave the door open, and you never hear a peep out of any of them.

Good thing I work from home when most of the kids are gone.

-BSG