Administrators, if this isn't the appropriate "spot" in which to discuss the nature of my subject, I whole-heartedly apologize in advance. And PLEASE let me know if I am in error.

I just got a good look at Sarah.R's photos in the latest photo albums section, and for some reason, I personally find these pictures offensive, I suppose, because they remind me of what I used to look like, the "before", and what I was headed towards.

I didn't take lightly, the decision to have the lap-band surgery. I was tired of being FAT! I was tired of being stared at and made fun of, if not openly, then "behind the hand". At the age of 45, I had yet to experience any medical problems making losing weight an absolute necessity, but I feel they were under the surface, waiting to spring up and bite my butt, so to speak. And it's sad that, for some people, it has to come to losing weight or facing certain debilitating medical problems and/or death. I believe I was headed in that direction.

Sarah.R, if you're comfortable in your own skin, if you're comfortable with your weight, more power to you. I'm sorry that, due to medical complications, you HAVE to lose weight. But try to think about the whole new world that could open up to you, once you start losing weight. I pray your husband (I hope I got that right!) supports you in this new endeavor, just as he has expressed his love for you just the way you are. Be strong, whatever you do.

Nope. You can express your opinion here in "the lounge", no problem! Now if you want a little more vigorous discussion, post in "rants & raves". Having said that:

You are certainly entitled to your opinion. I didn't see anything offensive in any of that art, but since there weren't any men in any of those pics, I guess I can't personally identify like you could.

I actually didn't see anything offensive to me personally in those photos. I think that all of us who are fuller figured have been ignored for way too long in the media and that America (or even the whole world) needs to get a good look at what obesity looks like. And also get a good look at what someone who's "different" from you looks like. Perhaps by doing so, we can love a little more, and learn a little more about others.

That being said, I do agree that were I to take photos like this of myself (with no Spanx on, or naked) I would not find it attractive at all. Seeing the effects of years of misuse on my body does not make me proud.

As a plus-sized model, I've struggled with this issue. How can I portray myself as beautiful and confident, knowing that I wasn't taking the best care of myself? But also, how can I encourage other women who have low self-esteem like I did, how to love themselves, right where they are, so that they can treat themselves better?

I appreciate your post. I think the issue of larger people in the media and whether it promotes or denotes obesity is a real one, and one that we should look at very carefully. Especially as we are looking to have this surgery, to give ourselves the gift of better health.

-music

I swing a bit on this issue. We had a huge argument on here about a plus sized girl who was in one of those model competions on the TV in England. She *was* a beautiful girl, way beyond the norm. She was comfortable in her own skin. I dont see anythign wrong at all with her being a model, being photographed or winning the competition over the other models. She is representative of a large portion of young women the world over.

However, she was being held up as some sort of icon, a poster girl for healthy living and body acceptance. Body acceptance maybe, but if you're obese, you're OBESE. You dont get that way by living a healthy lifestyle and encouraging acceptance of obesity is not going to do a lot for the health of western nations is it?

Body acceptance is one thing and there's plenty of ugly skinny people around just as there is beautiful obese ones. Beauty is beauty in any form. So if someone wants photos of themselves and wants to show them, I applaud her confidence and acceptance of herself. However, failing to acknowledge that fat is unhealthy is simply living in denial.

The crazy thing is though that many "plus sized models" are actually perfectly healthy weights, its the "regular sized models" who are dangerously underweight. There's plus sized as defined by the media and fashion industry, which definitely can be very healthy and then there's plus sized.

I'm afraid that overall I'm just too brainwashed though. I see a photo of a heavier naked woman and think YUCK. It jsut doesnt look "right" to me after 40 years of opening magazines to see perfect airbrushed images.

Edited January 22, 200917 yr by Jachut

I'm a big believer in being as healthy as you can be at the weight you are at. There are unhealthy skinny people because they don't eat right or exercise. It is possible if you line up two people, one obese and one not, and gauged their health that the obese person would beat out the skinny person.

This is one reason why I have always exercised even when morbidly obese. I also try to make healthy food choices at whatever weight I am. I know that I am healthier now at a lower weight than I was at a higher weight, but that doesn't mean everyone at a lower weight than me is automatically healthier than I am. Some are and some are not.

I'm glad she posted those photos.... as someone who is still in the process of this journey, I appreciate that there is art that depicts women other than the skinny minnies.