Sometimes I just want to scream, and cry, and kill my ex. He and I have always been friends, and we dated for a long time. Now he has started being sooooooo stupid that I broke up with him a little over a month ago, and he is driving me nuts. I used to have a friend and he used to be friends with her too, well he didnt like her anymore, but she was okay with me. I heard both of them talk so much bs about one another I was sick of it. All of a sudden the weekend that my RECENTLY widowed gma got married, I was emotional distressed and still dating him, well he took my friend to a club to go have fun and dance and stuff and told me I was not invited, and she (claiming to be a "friend") never asked once "would Jodie like to come?" NO! Everytime I am friends with this girl, she takes what I have, my clothes, aspirations, dreams, and men. I LOVE this guy (I know teen love, all the same tho), we were going to go to college together and get an apartment and everything, but ever since I was supposed to have this surgery, he has been proud of me, but pulling away too. Like he always brags about these girls being his friend and wanting him to go to parties with him and stuff. I know he's trying to make me jealous, but it just makes me feel like crap because I can't be that for him. Lately (last 3 weeks) he has went crazy wanting to party, but not invite me to go, and hang out with my ex-friend. I wish I could have an hour to beat the mess outta her! Anyways, I am gonna go crazy because this guy has lost his mind!?!?!?

Sometimes I just want to scream, and cry, and kill my ex. He and I have always been friends, and we dated for a long time. Now he has started being sooooooo stupid that I broke up with him a little over a month ago, and he is driving me nuts. I used to have a friend and he used to be friends with her too, well he didnt like her anymore, but she was okay with me. I heard both of them talk so much bs about one another I was sick of it. All of a sudden the weekend that my RECENTLY widowed gma got married, I was emotional distressed and still dating him, well he took my friend to a club to go have fun and dance and stuff and told me I was not invited, and she (claiming to be a "friend") never asked once "would Jodie like to come?" NO! Everytime I am friends with this girl, she takes what I have, my clothes, aspirations, dreams, and men. I LOVE this guy (I know teen love, all the same tho), we were going to go to college together and get an apartment and everything, but ever since I was supposed to have this surgery, he has been proud of me, but pulling away too. Like he always brags about these girls being his friend and wanting him to go to parties with him and stuff. I know he's trying to make me jealous, but it just makes me feel like crap because I can't be that for him. Lately (last 3 weeks) he has went crazy wanting to party, but not invite me to go, and hang out with my ex-friend. I wish I could have an hour to beat the mess outta her! Anyways, I am gonna go crazy because this guy has lost his mind!?!?!?

Awww Jodie darlin, if you learn nothing from this site learn this. The only one that will take care of you is you. Learn to stand on your own two feet and love yourself then everyone will want to be your friend. You will have this sophistication about you that everyone will want to get a piece of. So do the surgery for YOURSELF, exercise for YOURSELF, par-tay if you want but do it because YOU want to not because someone else wants you to, write in a journal all these feelings and emotions you are going through. Remember this though, it will get better.

Why would you wanna use up all that wasted energy beating up your ex-friend?

Why would you wanna use up all that wasted energy worrying about what HE is doing?

Why not focus that energy elsewhere? Like writing or drawing (doesn't have to be a masterpiece or a bestselling novel) or simply walking or listening to some really cool tunes and singing along or dancing to the music.

Life is way too short to just waste it on some lame guy and an ex-friend.

I know I know easier said than done but ya gotta start somewhere right?

HUGS, I remember those years.

You are the same age as my son. He was born October 8, 1987.

Using up all that energy IS EXERCISE!!! LOL! Wow that is cool, I did know u had a son. The sad part in all that is I already know that I need to chill, what is even sadder is that I dont get invited to parties because I am the fat girl, I have been told that several times. This is the most awful little town in the world, I think its worse than Ehtiopa, at least there I would be skinny. The ironic part is your son's b-day, is the same as the friend in the above story. Its just, he snapped, he wasnt always like that. I think I am a comfort level for him, he runs over everyone that cares about him and opts for those who dont, then cries to the ones that care about the ppl he has problems with. I dunno I dont feel so bad anymore, it's just, why do ppl around u snap when you want to have this surgery?

jodie,

i am going through a really really rough time too and i am determined to win in the end. i just recently ( friday) broke off my engagement with my boyfriend of 6 years. i am 25 years old and he is my first love. for the past 2-3 years i have been looking out for everyone but myself!! i decided that with this new journey i am taking that i am also going to do some serious soul searching...i dont even know me anymore...do you know you? i have changed my life for a man who did nothing but put me down, drink, and live off of me. nothing was good enough for him that i did..like buy a house, a brand new mustang, etc, etc but i came to realize that in a way he was jealous of everything i am.....only i really dont know who i am...that is the problem. i have so much ahead of me and so do you. i know its easier said than done..believe me been there done that soooo many times. but all i can say is find out who you are first. its all about you. remember that. no man, no car, no house, nothing can make you happy until you are happy with yourself.....and so my journey has began. im scared but thats because the unknown is frightening!!! but i am determined and therefore i will make it through and one day i will see me for who i am and it will all be okay. good luck to you and your journey

I know exactly how you girls feel!!! I am going through a divorce right now. After 18 years of marriage my husband decided he did not love me and wanted out. I too feel like I don't know who I am anymore because I basically gave up my identity to beciome his wife and the mother of our children. One day at a time is all I can do also. It is VERY scary to be alone after all these years. And Jodi, Teen age love is just as important as senior citizen love. It is giving of yourself, emotionally, to someone else who you expect to give as much back and when they don't it is devistating!! All I can hope for is that one day I will meet a man who really appreciates me and loves me just because I am me. And that may take a month or it may take 10 years. I do not know how long it will take, but in the mean time I am focusing on me and my children and making sure they know that I love them. By the way Jodi, My son is also the same age as you.

Keep your chin up and host the party yourself next time instead of waiting for some snob to invite you to one. Have your real friends there and make your own kind of fun and have your own "in" crowd. 20 years form now all those mean chicks , you know who they are, the skinny pretty girls, will come to your high schol reunion and will be fat and not so attractive and will have bald husbands with pop bellies who only wanted them because they were the "pretty" girl and you will have a man who loves you because you are you! It is really fun then

It is so funny, because I am giving all of you advice on being strong and stuff, but I never can be strong for myself. Sure, I may look strong on the outside, but inside I am hurting SOOOOOO bad that no amount of surgery can hurt that bad. BTW, I don't really have friends (not because I am fat) because I never go to school because of my comorbidities I can not go up and down the stairs and the school won't give me a key to the elevator, and I HURT SO BAD. I am going back in August though for my final round then I am free of this prejudice, hateful, rude little town in the sticks of Texas lol!!!! I HATE THIS PLACE!!!!

Also, my ex and I are still good friends and will always be, it's just ugly little whores that drive us to fighting sometimes. I hope that one day he will realize how much I love him (btw u can love someone and want to kill them too lol). On normal grounds I would be mad at him, and was, but now I am over it and we are cool now, but the "friend" in question is being sooooooooooooo immature as usual, but I wanna go party with my friends, but she is always there. I am not going to start anything because: a) I am too lazy, I am too fat, and C) I am not a fighter anyways. But he seems to think she would start stuff, but it takes 2, and I am not going to be part of that two, alls well I guess I will just have to wait until college to actually experience a party. It really is a shame tho that I was not invited to parties my freshman year because I was "too fat" hmmmmm....... really sad.

Jodi, I am also from a small town in Texas, Where are you from? I'm from Sachse which is a suburb of Dallas. Small towns can be both a blessing and a curse!!!

bubblesstina, I live in the infamous Jasper,Texas. LOL

Jodi, please don't think that you are not strong, or that you are lazy. You have more going for you that you know. Just from reading your post, I can tell that you are smart, insightful, witty and someone I would love to meet at a party, and from your photo I can say that you are beautiful. How can you think that you aren't a fighter? From the voice of experience I KNOW that just going to school as an overweight teen takes more strength and heart than most people could ever know. If you were not a fighter or lazy, you would have given up years ago!!! Don't put yourself down, there are too many small minded, insecure, petty, hurtful people ready to do that. If you have never believed anything else please believe that you are worth so much more than a man/boy who would risk losing you and all that you are for a cheap night of entertainment with a sad, insecure girl who doesn't know that men are a dime a dozen, but true friends are very rare. Its o.k. to cry on the inside (and the outside too), you have earned every tear, just as you have earned every laugh (and trust me you WILL laugh a lot more once your out of high school)

Keep you head high-Nora

:angry Guys! Well I think that you should get a "friend" that you hang out with and don't invite him along, make sure it is a male. This way you will find out one of two things:

1) He gets jealous and realizes how much he bothers you when he does things like that...

2) He won't do much of anything and will still want to be with you. Which in that case he really is just friends with this girl and you are over reacting.

I am not sure if that is the answer you wanted but that is how I would deal with it.

Good Luck, Etta

I would say to give yourself space from this guy, and the girl. It may be the girl who is getting on your nerves and 'causing' your fights with this guy, but he's allowing it to happen as well.

The other thing that I would recommend, is getting an apartment by yourself before you get an apartment with someone else. I moved out of my mom's house and into an apartment with my (now ex) boyfriend. He was a little older than me, and so it kind of went from living in my mom's place her way, to living in 'our' place the way he said it should be. When I broke up with him and moved into my own place, I learned how to do things my way, and how I wanted them done, and now I live with someone and there are certain things that I still do my way. He has his own things he can do his way as well. I guess it breaks down to getting your own identity, you know?

I was kind of a dork in school and so the only parties that I went to were mine and my other dorky friends', but I've been to a few 'real' parties since then and I honestly don't think you are missing much, LOL. But you may like that scene more than I do once you get there

I havent seen this girl since a week and a half before they went out to a club and abandoned me on my grandmother's wedding day. She figured out we were actually getting serious, and she swooped in on the opportunity. No she doesn't wanna date him, and no he doesnt wanna date her. Its the fact he told me I was NOT invited and that I was tripping, when he was abandoning me. Ever since prom night he started pulling away from me, like he does sometimes. Its like he doesnt want me to have fun with him. I dunno, all I actually know is that my only other friends are getting married in March and having a baby in October, and all they do is sit around and go rent movies, and frankly I am not pregnant and I didnt get anyone else pregnant, I have no obligations (except to love her and the baby unconditionally) but I am not a parent and I am sick and tired of sitting around with them like an old married couple! I love it sometimes, but most of the time I wanna get out and party!! I wanna be around ppl, drink, and try to dance (cant much because of my knees). I am sick and tired of sitting around this house, or my best friend's house. I wanna go out, but I never get invited.

I asked him to have something at his house instead of hers and invite her if he wanted. He said I'm not going to do that because stuff will start. I told him I will not do a thing or say a thing to her, I will leave her alone. He said yeah, but she will. I told him its a shame he would even want to be around that sort of immaturity, that she would start something over nothing. I never said anything that was not true about her and I didnt even say the whole truth, I didnt say anything that everybody didnt know already. All I said is she looks like Josie Grossy from never been kissed and that she was a lying, kniving, inconsiderate whore and that she is jealous and not very self-confident if she has to take what other girls have.

Jodi, Jodi, Jodi...

You are going about this all wrong. Why are you waisting your time and surrounding yourself with people like this. You need to learn to expect MORE for yourself. You want to chase some guy who may or may not like you? Who would go out with your friend without you? She is not the kind of friend I would want to have and he isn't the kind of guy I would settle for. Raise your standards!!! This guy sounds like a joke who isn't worth your time or energy. Why waste your time trying to change EITHER of them. Move on and find better friends! I know this sounds dorky but I want to recommend a book by Dr. Laura called "Ten Things Women do to Mess up Their Lives". I WISH I would have read it when I was your age. It would have saved me a LOT of heartache. You also should read a book called, "He's Just Not That In To You". If you don't do anything else, PLEASE do this. You wont regret it!!!

Good Luck, Lori

nothing can make you happy until you are happy with yourself...

Amen to that! How true it is!

Jodie

Pick yourself up and move on! This guy and this friend of yours are not worth it. Let the two of them have eachother. You are better then that arent you? You desreve to be treated better then that dont you?