I was banded on April 18th and since then I am now down 57 lbs. I have also dropped from a size 30/32 to a 24. (Personally I thought that was an accomplishment) Not where I want to be but I was feeling good about myself, I could actually look in the mirror and not cringe. That was until today. I went to my first family function (a 1 yr olds birthday party) with most of my family there. (most dont know about the surgery) NOT ONE PERSON PAID ME A COMPLIMENT. I am devistated, do I see a different person in the mirror or is it just the same fat girl that was always there. I actually dressed nice for the party because I was feeling good about myself but now I feel like I should have never dressed in somthing other than a tee-shirt and stretchy cotton shorts (my old fat attire) I had on a cute denim skirt a little bit past the knees (NO elastic waist band this time) nice wedge sandals and a lightweight white shirt.

Am I always going to be the invisable fat girl no one can look in the eye or will anyone ever notice.

I am really down and need a pick me up. Has anyone else had this emotional/physicial issue.

SOrry for venting...

This is wonderful, and I know you look like a real HOTTIE. Someone else mentioned if they see you all the time they may not notice the weight loss. Give us your secrets to success. Keep up the good work.

shagamelic

The secrets to my success thus far are a 19 month old and a 3 1/2 yr old little boys that keep me moving morning noon and night, I am enjoying being able to keep up with them now so we are having a great summer. I also am a stay at home mom and spend my days with housework and yardwork, I only seem to sit when I have to take the time to eat or drive, other than that I am on the go. Plus I am on so many Vitamins because of a b12 and serious Iron defiency that I only found out 1 wk before surgery those little pills give me the energy I have always been lacking. You would have thought some Dr along they way would have mentioned my deficiencys because now that I have my past health records I Know they have been there for at least 5 yrs. No wonder I used to be tired all the time and here I was thinking I was tired from being lazy and fat. When it was a combination of the 2.

You are all wonderful and have made me feel better, who gives a damn what my oblivious family notices or doesnt notice, I am doing this for myself and my 2 boys and they are already enjoying having a more active mommy.

We who know plus-sizes immediately recognize the difference between a size 30 and a 24. (What an erormous accomplishment for you!) But I don't think most people do - to them anything over a size 18 is fat ... period.

Sad but true; it's a "sizist" variation on the racist "they all look alike." A more inocuous comparison might be found in blondes who call any hair color darker than medium brown "black," whereas brunettes see infinite variety from chestnut to ebony.

There may be other reasons for the silence. Some people -- it runs in clans, unfortunately -- just don't give compliments. Ever. Others think it will sound rude if they sound as if they're drawing your weight to your attention.

You've lost a lot of weight in a short time. It must be frustrating not to have your family notice. But they will, they will. Meanwhile, you're getting healthier, so just take a deep breath at your next family event and concentrate on having a good time.

That Is An Amazing Accomplishment...you Go Girl!!!! I Havent Had The Band Done Yet Cuz I Am Still Awaiting Approval But I Can Tell A Difference Already In Some Friends/family. I Think It Was Dr. Phil Who Had A Show A Few Weeks Ago About How People Will Unconsiously Do Things To Emotionally Hurt Others. For Example, 2 Sisters Live Together And One Decides To Go On A Diet. The One Not On The Diet Will Unconsiously Try To Get The One On The Diet To Be Bad By Bringing Home Bad Food, Etc. Maybe Your Family Wasnt Unconsiously Doing It But Im Sure There Were Some Jealous Ones. My Best Advice Is To Remember That " Life Is All About You"....if You Take That Attitude And Put It Into Every Situation You Come Into....others Will Take Notice!!! Notice Of How Bold And Beautiful You Are!!!!!!

Alexra - Congratulations on the awesome loss. don't worry about people not commenting - sometimes the comments are not complimentary. Just give yourself a big pat on the back and do something for yourself - get a manicure, massage, etc. You deserve it!!

I agree with all the banders comments but especially Kristi's. My youngest sister is about 300 pounds and has not said anything about my weightloss. However all my co-workers and friends just oooh and ahhhh all over it! They are jealous. Either that or they are thinking...is she sick? lol Nope! healthier than she has been in a long time...you go girl!!!

My dad always says to me, "Hopey people will NEVER react or act the way you expect them to"....and he is soooo right! That applies to this situation too. I bet they noticed just didnt say anything...Since they don't know about the surgery maybe they thought this was just another "fleeting attempt" and it wouldn't last so they shouldn't say anything. You know what you have done and you know how far you have come! Don't knock it. You had this surgery for your self...not for other people...PAT YOUR SELF ON THE BACK! You have come sooo far and you should be proud! I know it sucks when you don't get the reponce you wanted...but ya know what...YOU ARE AWESOME!

Congratulations!

It could also be too that these are people that you see everyday so they really aren't trying to be mean or anything but just don't really see it. WHen I first started loosing weight I still wore all of the same clothes I wore before. I coulnd't afford (still can't) to go out and buy new clothes but when I finally got some extra money and did get some stuff that fit me - the very first day I went to work everone came out of the wood work and was like "Wow - you have lost a lot of weight. We didn't even notice cause you were wearing all your old stuff." People I didn't even know but had just seen in passing were saying the same thing to me. Talk about a ego boost. I thought people just weren't saying anything cause they were jealous too. So now every chance I get I wear something that shows off my figure. A year ago I never would have thought abuot wearing a tank top and now I will wear something off the shoulder!! Don't worry - when you least expect it - that's when you will get it!! Keep up the GREAT WORK!!!

Hey- Woo Hoo! Did you feel the earth shake? I just did the Happy Dance for you! 57 pounds gone forever!!! You go girl. I was the same way, felt like no one would ever notice my loss. You have made a tremendous accomplishment first off in deciding to get the band surgery and two for getting it done and three for becoming a real loser! Hee hee! People will start noticing it took me losing around 80 pounds before they started saying anything to me, so HANG on, the compliments are coming your way. You will see. Keep up the great work and hold you head up high and SMILE - you are becoming a gorgeous new person! God Bless!

This statement is so true when I stop and think about it. It totally reflects the people in my life who are truly happy for me.