My husband and I are newlyweds (May 10th, 2008) and this weekend we found out that his family expects us to host Thanksgiving at our house - you know, since we're the "newest part of the family", or some crap like that. Here's the snag - I'm getting my band exactly 21 days before Thanksgiving. :embaressed_smile:

Going to someone else's house for Thanksgiving and eating very little would have been tough, but I'd have managed. Now, not only will I have to eat the food, but I have to prepare it!!!!! Refusing to host Thanksgiving is pretty much out of the question. There's no excuse I could come up with short of death that would keep me out of the kitchen on that day.

So my question is - how do I handle this? What are some Thanksgiving dishes I can make that will fit into my Mushies Phase but won't be obvious? I think it sort of goes without saying that most of the people in attendance on Thanksgiving Day will not know about my surgery, so I need to make sure I don't draw any attention to myself.

Can I eat dark meat turkey (it's moister than white meat) during my Mushies Phase, as long as I chew it 30+ times before swallowing? I know I can eat mashed potatoes and apple sauce, but what else?

HELP! :cool2:

You could always say that you are not feeling well, which would account for you not eating much. Also - you could order the food in - it seems that the grocery stores these days will cook the turkey and pack it all up. All you'd have to do is ask someone perhaps to bring a jello salad... everything else would be there.

Maybe chopped up small dark meat turkey on top of Mashed Potatoes and gravy, Sweet potatoes, moist dressing, brocolli casserole, sweet potato or pumpkin pie filling, leave the crust (sugar free of course), Jello. Of course, I'm old school too, NO ONE would force this on me. I wouldn't do it, but you're not me. I have NO fear of saying NO and dare you to ask again. Those are just a few things off the top of my head. Congrats on your marriage.

My husband and I are newlyweds (May 10th, 2008) and this weekend we found out that his family expects us to host Thanksgiving at our house - you know, since we're the "newest part of the family", or some crap like that. Here's the snag - I'm getting my band exactly 21 days before Thanksgiving.

Going to someone else's house for Thanksgiving and eating very little would have been tough, but I'd have managed. Now, not only will I have to eat the food, but I have to prepare it!!!!! Refusing to host Thanksgiving is pretty much out of the question. There's no excuse I could come up with short of death that would keep me out of the kitchen on that day.

So my question is - how do I handle this? What are some Thanksgiving dishes I can make that will fit into my Mushies Phase but won't be obvious? I think it sort of goes without saying that most of the people in attendance on Thanksgiving Day will not know about my surgery, so I need to make sure I don't draw any attention to myself.

Can I eat dark meat turkey (it's moister than white meat) during my Mushies Phase, as long as I chew it 30+ times before swallowing? I know I can eat mashed potatoes and apple sauce, but what else?

HELP!

Why is lap band surgery not counted as "real" surgery.

You wouldn't be expected to do this 3 weeks after a triple bypass surgery.

You wouldn't be expected to do this 3 weeks after a hysterectomy

You wouldn't be expected to do this 3 weeks after a knee replacement

But hey, its only lap banding -- no problem, its not "Real" surgery.

<<shaking head>>

Glad your Mom is helping you, but I wish your husband would stand up for you.

Why is lap band surgery not counted as "real" surgery.

You wouldn't be expected to do this 3 weeks after a triple bypass surgery.

You wouldn't be expected to do this 3 weeks after a hysterectomy

You wouldn't be expected to do this 3 weeks after a knee replacement

But hey, its only lap banding -- no problem, its not "Real" surgery.

<<shaking head>>

Glad your Mom is helping you, but I wish your husband would stand up for you.

Where did you get the impression that I didn't think this was a real surgery??? :tongue2:

Of course it's a real surgery! And it's not that my husband isn't "sticking up for me". Not at all. It's just that in this family, most importantly his deeply-rooted traditionalist Southern family, it's the job of the "New" family to do Thanksgiving. Typically, his Grandmother hosts the event every year, but since we are the newest "family" then we get the job this year. Next year it'll go back to Grandma, until she passes. At which time it will more than likely move on to my DH's mother. It's just tradition and it's not about forcing anything. It's about accepting the family I've married into and continuing with a tradition they've had for years.

My husband isn't just throwing me out to pasture, aka KITCHEN, and letting me roll around in the hay by myself. He's offered to help in any way he can - but I know he's not a cook, lol. So my mom is also coming over to help prepare the meal and make sure the house looks nice.

I refuse to tell my in-laws about the surgery. At least not right now. They're just getting used to the idea of "ME" as part of the family, so I am not going to throw another huge log on the fire by telling them I've having weight-loss surgery. It is absolutely out of the question. If you can't understand that, then I'm sorry. Since I am not telling them about my surgery, then that means I can't tell them that it's better if Grandma hosts Thanksgiving again this year. I can't just go against tradition like that. Again, I'm sorry if you can't understand that either.

My husband and my mom are both stepping in to help out, so at this point, all I need to figure out is what I'm going to eat that day. I just need to make a list of the things I can eat, and make sure I prepare those foods that day.

And just for the record, I had my phone consult with Dr. Kirshenbaum yesterday, and I asked him about Thanksgiving. He said at 21 days I should be eating mostly normal foods, as long as I can handle it. He said that, aside from being tired, I should be fine.

You go girl..............don't let the negativity get to you. You'll do just fine and most of us understand your situation. You've discussed it with your physician, you've got your support system in place and thats all that really matters. Please let us know how it goes. We really do want you to succeed!

Mom to the rescue . . . that is all you needed, an extra body and you should be good to go. Husbands are great, but if they don't cook then it takes a lot of "directing," lol.

I think it will go great and I absolutely think it was a good decision to keep the surgery to yourself.

Everyone is correct in that people "don't notice" what you are eating. I have been banded for almost 8 months and only twice has anyone ever noticed or said anything after an untold number of meals with other people.

No one knows that I am banded other than my husband, even after losing most of my weight. It has really not been difficult to keep it under wraps at all. Once people notice your new and improved physique . . . you can always say it is from chasing after your new hubby, LOL.

Jaime, it sounds like you've got it all worked out! That's wonderful! The way you've got it all planned you should be totally fine if not a little tired and that's normal for anyone hosting a family dinner! I like the tradition of things but I also thinks it puts a lot of pressure on the new couple. I could understand the 2nd year but not the first! EEEK!

I'm really glad you called your surgeon. I'm sure that made things better for you too. Don't stress, it'll be great! And you HAVE to let us know how it all goes!! Best wishes!!

all this talk of turkey is making me :confused:. But seriously I wish you luck. You will do fine. Cranberry sauce is another good choice as long as there are no chunks of fruit in it.

all this talk of turkey is making me :confused:. But seriously I wish you luck. You will do fine. Cranberry sauce is another good choice as long as there are no chunks of fruit in it.

haha the cheap kind never has fruit in it :wub:

Jmegirl, first congrats on your marriage and your band. Second, good luck on Turkey Day! Nothing really much to say but to warn you that your appetite may be back in full force by then so preparing Thanksgiving may be a form of torture. At least it would have been for me at 21 days!! Make sure you have a game plan to not graze all day (it is soooo easy to do). I completely understand where you are coming from with regards to not being able to say no to this. And believe me, I have no trouble telling people no. but sometimes you do things you don't want to for your family. Best wishes and let us know how it goes!!!

Cookie

Good luck tomorrow Jme grl.............let us know how it turns out!

Thanks!!! I've been in Planning Overdrive the last few days. But I'm proud to say that today is my 3 week Bandiversary and I feel like a million bucks! I really don't even feel like I had surgery, except for when I bend over and try to pick up something slightly heavy - then I feel the strain and remind myself that I'm only 3 weeks post-op. But I really do feel fantastic.

Now the only thing I have to worry about is - Uncle Floyd is bringing his girlfriend and his daughter. I didn't plan on extra people!!! We don't have enough seats at the table! :scared2:

So? How did it go??

Yes, we're all dying to know!!!

Well, Thanksgiving went off without a hitch. We had a lot of people, way too much food, and everyone enjoyed themselves. We decided to cook the turkey in a Roaster Oven to reserve the oven in the kitchen for everything else, and that booger was done an hour and a half early! I had no idea the turkey would cook so fast in the Roaster Oven! So, as a result we had a slightly dried out bird for dinner, but thankfully we also had ham.

It took my husband and I until Sunday to finally get the house back in order. Gosh, it's been such a long weekend! I worked Friday, we had a football game and a housewarming party on Saturday - so yesterday was laundry and cleaning day, haha.

I gotta tell you though, I didn't realize what kind of effect it would have on me not being able to eat a lot. I have progressed to normal foods now, but I still only ate about 10 bites before I was stuffed. 10 measly bites, and everyone else around me was chowing down on yummy food. Of course, no one actually noticed how little food I ate, so there were no questions.

After dinner while everyone was serving themselves dessert, I went into the living room and curled up on the couch with my mom and just cried on her shoulder for a few minutes. A little later I went upstairs to my bathroom to cry. Not being able to eat really bothered me. I guess I didn't realize just how addicted to food I am. Don't get me wrong, after 10 bites I was really full - I just wanted to keep eating. The food was good and I wanted more - but I just couldn't stomach it, and it was sooooo depressing.

So basically, there were no problems with the day at all, and everyone had a blast - but not being able to eat what I wanted to really took a toll on me, and what should have been a really enjoyable day with family turned into a slightly depressing day with family.