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New Classes starting!! LOL!!



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For those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating marriage.

Under the assumption that men need (or ought) to be trained for marriage, Southwest Tech is offering a new 2 year associates degree.

TWO YEAR DEGREE: Becoming a Real Man. That's right, in just six mini-mesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn anassociates degree in MA (Male Arts).Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR

Autumn Schedule:

MEN 101 Combating Stupidity

MEN 102 You, Too, Can Do Housework

MEN 103 PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut

MEN 104 We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:

MEN 110 Wonderful Laundry Techniques

MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response to getting in at 2 AM

MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception

EAT 100 Get a Life, Learn to Cook

EAT 101 Get a Life, Learn to Cook II

ECON 001 What's Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:

MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like a Buttface When You're Wrong

MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence

MEN 122 YOU, the Weaker Sex

MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers

ECON 001 What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR

Autumn Schedule:

SEX 101 You CAN Fall Asleep without It

SEX 102 Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower

SEX 103 How to Stay Awake After Sex

MEN 201 How to Put the Toilet Seat Down

Elective (See Electives Below)

Winter Schedule:

MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency

MEN 211 How to Not Act Younger than Your Children

MEN 212 You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver

MEN 213 Honest, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise or Billy Dee

MEN 230A Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important

Spring Schedule:

MEN 220 Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)

MEN 221 Fluffing the Blanket After farting Is Not Necessary

MEN 222 Real Men Ask for Directions

MEN 223 Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay

MEN 230B Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2

Course Electives:

EAT 201 Cooking with Tofu

EAT 202 Utilization of Eating Utensils

EAT 203 Burping and Belching Discreetly

MEN 231 Mothers-in-law

MEN 232 Appear to Be Listening

MEN 233 Just Say "Yes, Dear"

ECON 001 Cheaper to Keep Her

Just a thought for all the women out there...

MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause, GUYnocologist (poetic spelling).

Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men? Send this to all of the women you know (and men with a sense of humor) and brighten their day!!!... and when we have real trouble, it's a HISterectomy. (Ifit'scalled a HISterectomy, why doesn't he get it?)

Live simply.

Love generously.

Care deeply.

Speak kindly.

Leave the rest to God.

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LOL - This has made me laugh!

My personal favorite "course"... MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency

I wish I knew how many times hubby had the entire family (even the 2 yr old!) looking for the remote! He has even called home from work, just to ask, "Did yall find the remote for the tv yet?"

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I've seen the list before but it's missing something:

Grabbing Your Weiner and Twirling it like a Propeller Will NOT turn her on.

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Grabbing Your Weiner and Twirling it like a Propeller Will NOT turn her on.

Im dying here with laughter..LOL..it is so nice to know my husband is not the only man who does this LOL

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Well I got good advice from my father before I got married. Basically he informed me that it was mandatory that all grooms had to watch the Bill Cosby video entitled, "Himself" in order to learn how to outsmart your wife by screwing up the laundry and feeding the children all the wrong foods for Breakfast. Thereby never being responsible for those things again. But the most valuable piece of advice my father gave to me was to have the proper outlook and never insist on winning. He said live by the motto, "I can be right or I can be happy, but I can't be both. I chose to be happy." :-) then twirl my u-know-what around.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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