My Dr insists on his support group. There is also one online. I joined only to find out that I am the only Lap Band. Everyone is RNY, Gastric Bypass. I was referred to another web site, even more biased to Bypass. I was "attacked" for my choice. Someone remarked, I can't believe Dr K didn't talk you out of the Lap Band like he did me. YOu are not going to be happy.

I just need some Lap Band Support.:thumbup:

Duplicate post.

brandy - you KNOW me; i don't entertain or engage in "MY WLS" crap is better than yours. to each it's own - but i did/do have a valid story to add to this thread & i don't typically over indulge in pissing contests.

i am NO cheerleader - my expectations of the band are mine & if they fail - well; on to the next chapter. lets not stereotype those with valid stories on the subject.

You DO seem like you have a problem with anyone who disagrees with you! Brandy wasn't even referring to you. :crying: So, if you don't like to get into pissing matches, why does it seem like you are starting them?

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My Dr has a support group which I had to join. I am the one who was bashed. When I said something to the leader, I was directed to another group obesityhelp.com where I read scathing trash from RNYs again bands. In my Drs group I was attacked and actually told

"I'm surprised that Dr. K did not talk you out of the Lap Band as he did me! I went into his office convinced that I would be having the Lap Band"

and

"I am curious if Dr. K had a preference for you either way?

You may wish to take time and read some of the abstracts posted on the www.asbs.org website. This is the American Society of Bariatric and Metobolic Surgeons. Eash year they have a conference and you can find some very interesting research abstracts on the site."

This is just a small sample, I had to keep samples so that I can tell my Dr why his support group was not right for me. Even though I had clearly expressed that this was a personal choice I was constantly told that their choice was the only correct choice.

And the last time I posted to obesityhelp.com I read the most disgusting tirade against someone who choose a lap band. I decided there and then that this was not the sight for me.

Just as you may not be one of the biggotted, obviously there are enough of us who incounted this type of behavior to get so many posts. Actually everyone was so supportive and as you said, it doesn't matter what form you choose, just don't shove your choice down my throat.

I personally expressed my condolences to the young woman who lost her sister. Personally I am not prejudice against anyone! Be it RNY or DS, but TRUST ME a few of us have experienced CRAP, as I put it, from others in other groups. That is why I choose to be in this group, with people who understand me and my choices.

I guess you have received all my pent up feelings, but when you cannot even participate in your own surgerons support group. Funny - I guess they didn't understand the concept of SUPPORT!

I'm sorry you are getting that type of "support." I don't think it's right for any WLS patient to be so against the other. That goes for RNYers bashing Bandsters too! Just as people on this board share their experiences, I wanted to share mine in that I've never seen/heard anyone bash the other. But, life is short, and I have now! :crying:

Luluc,

I wasn't directing that to you personally and don't know why you thought I did. I have had problems with people at this forum, albeit probably just a handful but you are not one of them. Things got a bit petty here in months past, just as they do in any forum, part of the game I suppose.

Anyway I don't come that often or post that often, not like I used to as I have changed my POV of this forum but still am banded so I like to keep a pulse on things once in a while.

Lately I've been reading various threads attacking other forums and certain people in particular who have had other WLS and find it to be immature and petty. Maybe you don't read all the threads that I have and haven't seen it. As a mother of a RNYer and personally am a Lapbander I maybe a bit more objective about things and maybe not, lol. So I have to learn about my own proceedure and deal with my own issues as well as my daughters.

So it really gets in the way of things when I see how immature people have gotten on some of these forums this one included as well as Obesityhelp but I don't see Lapbandtalk as the "high ground" in any way, shape or form. It's too bad there is so much bullying around here and other forums for WLS when all people want is real support and knowledge.

We've all suffered enough in our society, especially as women, with too much pressure to be thin, first with diets that fail and we end up gaining weight, diet meds, and then placing our children on diets at early ages did nothing for the "obesity" epidemic in our society and now we're all getting WLS! When one of those screws up we now get revision WLS. The thought that we're all fighting over whose WLS is better is a bit insane to me at this moment, sorry brandyII-Nanook:frown:

You see...now THAT'S why we get along so well! :crying:

I also want to add that some RNYers may not have even considered the band pre-op. I for one, and not one of those people. I was ALL about the band. Did research, talked on here, and even bought a book (and I hate to read LOL). So, I know the problems that bandsters face...not first hand, of course, but I can relate! So, all I was trying to say is that...we should all be able to support each other regardless of what type of surgery we've had. We are all fat or formerly fat...we've all gone through similar obstacles in our life! We BBWs and BBMs should be able to stick together through "thick and thin." (pun intended) :biggrin2:

So, to the poster (luluc) that I had a "pissing match" here with. I apologize, and don't want to argue with you. That would be defeating my whole purpose!

At my hospital, the issue between RNY and Bandsters got so bad they split the support groups up. According to the bariatric coordinator, the level of hostility was enormous.

I have to agree with the poster who stated that this is primarily a female thing. Females use psych-ops to establish pecking orders and dominance, and making someone feel like an outsider is step 1 in controlling them.

All I know is that I posted on Obesity Help, and the RnYers just came after me with a passion. I personally don't care what one did to themselves and their internal organs, but calling me out for my choices isn't their place.

I haven't seen that level of attack here against other types of surgery, except maybe in isolated R&R threads.

At my hospital, the issue between RNY and Bandsters got so bad they split the support groups up. According to the bariatric coordinator, the level of hostility was enormous.

I have to agree with the poster who stated that this is primarily a female thing. Females use psych-ops to establish pecking orders and dominance, and making someone feel like an outsider is step 1 in controlling them.

All I know is that I posted on Obesity Help, and the RnYers just came after me with a passion. I personally don't care what one did to themselves and their internal organs, but calling me out for my choices isn't their place.

I haven't seen that level of attack here against other types of surgery, except maybe in isolated R&R threads.

That's so sad, but you have a point. Maybe it's not all about what we do to our insides, but who's lost the most weight! A lot of women are competitive that way.

I've gotten tons of support here on the forums and haven't gone to a support group yet. But I'll tell ya, if a fellow RNYer says something nasty to a bandster (or visa versa) I'm gonna be livid! :crying:

See, this is the type of support we all need. When I posted the original entry, I was so down and almost in tears. But here I got support from people who understood and who cared.

Honestly, I don't care what if a person is blue, as long as they are caring and compassionate and honest. We have all suffered just being overweight and the "crap" we have gotten with that. I was married to a man for 22 years who insisted that I would just do it HIS way I would not have a weight problem. Fat people to him were disgusting (me especially), they were repulsive slovenly lazy pigs who didn't try. To bad they don't have "bypass" for brains - ha ha ha ha ha - but seriously, I didn't mean this to pick on anyone, and I was surprised by all those who had experienced the same thing. But in the end - it was the support and a place to vent or express ourselves, that ment the most. So I guess it doesn't matter which WLS we choose, we just need to understand and be there.

Weight loss surgery is like religion: Once you've got it, you think yours is the best

Weight loss surgery is like religion: Its personal, not persecutional.

Weight loss surgery is like religion: If it works for you, I'm happy, too.

As for my sister... she never regretted having weight loss surgery, and given the choice, would have chosen the RnY again, rather than wait 10 years for the Lap Band. Hers is a very sad story, and hopefully not a common one. I'm just thrilled that I have another option.

Lastly, it disturbs me that women attack each other for their WLS choices. Life is far too short to waste energy on negativity. We need to uphold each other and learn to soar together.