I just need to get this off of my chest. I hate working with most other women. All the drama, the back stabbing, the competition with clothes, jewelry so on.

I work in a small lab with one other woman who I get along with quite well. We have similar likes and dislikes and are the same age. Recently a job was posted in our area that sounded a lot like my job. I inquired about the job and got no response for over two weeks. Finally, when I did get an interview for my own job it appeared it was only a formality. The new HR woman who does not like me for who knows what reason had already hand selected a new young girl with no experience to take the job. Naturally, I protesed loudly. I wound up with the job, raise, and this new girl to help me. This sounds good, but the girl is not only a tattle tail, she is a shark in the Water. She has already started telling stories about me to other people and has tried to get a married engineer she has been sleeping with fired.:biggrin:

I do not carry much weight in our company and nepotism and cronyism is a real problem. I normally like to fly under the radar, but feel I wiil need to keep my eyes and ears on this girl at all times. I just do not have time for all of this crap in my life. I simply want to do my job to the best of my ability and go home. I hate playing games and despise back stabbers.:biggrin:

Any advice on how to handle this new very pretty very young and very threating girl will be appreciated.

Yep, I definitely prefer working with men. The first half of my working life was spent doing administrative and counselling work in a university setting. Most of the folks with whom I worked were women. The second half of my work life was spent building aircraft. Men are much easier to deal with, I think. And the women's bathrooms were never crowded, an added bonus.

I'm a nurse - so have been working with women for years - I understand this terrible and sad situation. When you get a good group of woman together in a work place - there is no bond stronger. However the reverse is true also; if it's a bad group - there is nothing worse.

There's a book that helped me; "Women's Inhumanity to Women". In your particular situation; I would keep detailed notes! Hand written or typed notes - like a journal - are accepted in a court of law. So your superiors would most likely accept them too. It's time consuming but to your advantage. It's not likely your trouble maker will take the time to do this.

Take the high road and I hope it works out for you. It's a bad situation.

Oooooh, I HAAAATE working with other women.

What I suggest is do what you're doing - stay under the radar, do your job, come in on time, etc, etc. Get her alone so no one can overhear and drop the bomb - tell her you know she's saying stuff about you and you want to know why. Be nice to her in front of other people so no one else can say you dislike her, but give her the evil eye in private.

I used to have a friend act like this - she was so nice to everyone on the outside, and on the inside (only revealed to me, her "best" friend) she would spew out vitriolic crap about everyone. I ended up not being her friend. But everyone else thought she was miss perfect, so nice. So be like her in that respect - on the outside you're nice to this girl, so everyone thinks you're still a great co-worker, but to this girl, and only this girl, let her know you know what she's saying about you. Hmm, does that make sense?

Thanks for the advice. I plan on getting the book "Women's Inhumanity to Women". I will look for tonight after work. Maybe I will even bring it to work and read it on lunch time. Her cubicle is attached to mine so I can leave the book in plain sight. Lindata this girl sound just like your former friend. People here at work are already telling me how sweet she is. I also like the idea of taking notes. I on the computer so much it will not be a problem to do daily if necessary.

I like to consider myself a team player and really do not have time for all the drama, but in this case feel I need to defend my job and dignity. Thanks again.

JP

MollyA is right. The RIGHT group of women working together can form a bond like no other. I worked in such a group a few years and jobs back. There were 5 of us, and we were close, and worked together like a well oiled machine. We got things DONE. We worked rings around everyone else. I was younger then, and thought it would be this way everywhere. Rude awakening at my next job. Women are bitches, but I've found that men can be way worse gossips than any group of women I've ever been around, so either way, maybe it just depends on the personalities.

This pretty young thing sounds like trouble, though. Do keep a journal of what's going on, and date everything. CYA at all costs!

id do exactly wat the others are telling u.. young pretty lil things are trouble from exp and u dont need to take that crap.. get her on her own n confront her as to why shes talking bout u? that u dont like it and u'l take it further if she continues.

Document everything. If you do write it down and date it it did not happen. Thats what they keep telling me at my job. Make sure you document everything. I would rather work with men any day. Donna

In our office it is the men who are horrible to work with. They hate working for a woman boss and complain about her all the time, saying she does not do her job properly and complaining to her superiors. They compete with each other to see who can do their work the quickest, cutting corners and not doing all they should, so that we women have to clear up their messes. There is one really obnoxious man who is always complaining about how bad everyone else is and how good he is. We women on the other hand are very supportive, do the work the way it should be done and get on very well. I wish we could get rid of the men. I am not a man hater by the way. I married one.

In our office it is the men who are horrible to work with. They hate working for a woman boss and complain about her all the time, saying she does not do her job properly and complaining to her superiors. They compete with each other to see who can do their work the quickest, cutting corners and not doing all they should, so that we women have to clear up their messes. There is one really obnoxious man who is always complaining about how bad everyone else is and how good he is. We women on the other hand are very supportive, do the work the way it should be done and get on very well. I wish we could get rid of the men. I am not a man hater by the way. I married one.

why would you marry a man-hater? :eek:

I've had more bad men bosses than women bosses. Like the guy who told the other people on my team that I was pretty smart -- for a girl.

You say you have plenty of computer time to document the things going on. Take it one step further, document it, and email it to yourself at your home computer, and then begin a file, if ever you have to print them out, it will be proof of the date on the send of the file.

We did similar back before everyone owned a computer, by documenting things, then mailing a copy to ourselves. Then when the mail came, we just kept the unopened envelopes. When we got to court----having the information dated by postmark, made a huge difference!

If there is anyone in your place of business you get along with and trust, always BCC her anything you email back and forth with your witchy new coworker.

Good Luck----working in a stressful environment is just horrible!

Kat

Originally posted by miztrniceguy

why would you marry a man-hater?

No I married a man - you know what I meant:lol::eek: