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Will my dating life improve???



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Hey single ladies! I am not banded yet I am in month 3 of my supervised diet. I mentioned to a friend yesterday that I believe that when I am skinny, my dating life will be better. I am tired of being not noticed or over looked because I am overweight. When I go out to clubs, I NEVER get asked out. :eek:

I believe that once I begin to lose weight, more guys will be attracted to me. (I do not have a self esteem problem!)

What do you think about this? Do you think this is a fact that most overweight singles deny regardless of evidence around them? Has anyone's dating life improved since they have lost weight?:thumbup:

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absolutely....i stopped dating because i didnt want to go out with anyone that would go out with someone as heavy as me.

i recently started dating someone and i think i am very comfortable in my own skin so this is coming across to others.

you will see just a little weight off and you automatically start feeling "sexier"

(thats what happened to me)

you definitely have something to look forward to and it also helped to give me more reasons to stay on track

good luck....

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well, first of all, clubs aren't a place you want to meet men, trust me. They are there to get laid.

You can be overweight and have tons of self confidence but most overweight people have none so they stay single and shy away from anyone who might be interested. I was like that 110 pounds ago and I'm still like that now, in a sense. It's odd cause I still feel fat, but people tell me how small I am now. There's a lot of mental issues you have to face and deal with because you're changing bodies, practically. Everything you are used to, such as the way people look and treat you, the way you feel in public, it changes, but the mind doesn't. You feel more self confident, especially when you pass and see a reflection to yourself, but the mind still feels like you're big and mentally, it just doesn't go away. Just remember that. It's always good to talk to people who have gone through it or some hospitals offer a therapist for people in the process of losing weight. it helps.

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Fat, Skinny, Ugly, Cute, Freaky, Geaky, Gay, Straight, ... you can date. It's all about attitude. It probably will improve if you have more confidence, but it's up to your attitude, not how you look.

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the better i look and feel, the easier it is to attract men. but my weight was my protection, now i feel vulnerable and i hate that..... but im busy every weekend and im learning to chill and not be so tough.... im lucky that the job i do involves lots of opportunity to meet men. most are very nice. i date a lot but im not intimate yet........... not ready to let someone that close unless i think they are top shelf....... im a flirt , but im not easy.................. if you know what i mean.

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Hey single ladies! I am not banded yet I am in month 3 of my supervised diet. I mentioned to a friend yesterday that I believe that when I am skinny, my dating life will be better. I am tired of being not noticed or over looked because I am overweight. When I go out to clubs, I NEVER get asked out. :biggrin:

I believe that once I begin to lose weight, more guys will be attracted to me. (I do not have a self esteem problem!)

What do you think about this? Do you think this is a fact that most overweight singles deny regardless of evidence around them? Has anyone's dating life improved since they have lost weight?:smile2:

Sorry to burst your bubble....

no, it won't improve.

The reasons why you don't have a good dating relationship will still be there after you lose weight.

It's not the weight that's causing a damper on dating..it's you!

(this coming from someone who has been thin, fat, plump, skinny, etc. No matter my size...I'm still me.)

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Josiebies!

Thank you for what you said. I feel the same. I won't date now because I don't want someone who is attracted to me as I am now. I said that to the psychologist and he said "wow, I've never heard that before, that is interesting" I could tell he wanted to delve into it more, but time was passing and I had another appointment. It didn't dent my confidence, but I did feel rather original after that. Good to see that someone else feels the same way.

Altspeedy:

I have never had a problem attracting men. I agree that it has to do with confidence and attitude. However, if you are more confident once you loose weight, then your confidence may attract more people. Keep your head up and look men in the eye and SMILE. You would be surprised at how many will smile back. If nothing else, it makes for a good day when you have people smiling back at you.

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I had no self confidence but as i grow heathier i feel so much better about myself therefore i talk to guys now before i just hide, im happy and confidence to be around them.

Some say to me they feel they are talkin to someone new because i use to always never talk before and 2 of them keep saying they want to marry me lool so yes to be honest it does improve just takes time to find the right one :wub: but let me tell you it makes you feel sooo good and "sexier"!

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When I'm lean and in-shape, I tend to get a LOT more attention from women than when I'm fat (like I am now). If I'm fat, I'm discouraged from going out, which minimizes my accessibility/visibility.

I'll admit that I don't notice when I'm being hit on for the most part though.

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I just had to write on this. I am very heavy. Have been my whole life. Except for my senior year in high school. I weighed about 167 and was in a size nine. (Im almost 6 foot tall). My dating life didnt improve. It was when my self esteem improved is when my dating life started improving. Ya know what, my self esteem didn improve until I was about 200 pounds. I stopped caring about what people thought and learned to love myself. Sure, being thin can attract men, but it wont keep them...

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    • Alisa_S

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

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