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12 Steps of Overeaters Anonymous



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Hi Daniel, Thank you for sharing. I have been in OA almost 4 years. In my first two years I was abstinent, working the program and lost 90 lbs. Then life got in the way, i stopped going to meetings and gained 80 back. (that's when my Dr. suggested the surgery). I feel that OA is always in my heart and i KNOW that it works for me if I work it. I feel the same as you said, one more tool in my arsenal. I'm going back to meetings and trying to get back to working the program.

I was so excited to see a 12 step thread started finally here... a whole area for multiple threads even... I tried to start a thread for people who have been in OA/FA to get feedback on how others in program have responded, did you share at a group level or only with your sponsor... could you help out that thread maybe and share your experience there?

This thread is GREAT for people to help learn about OA and if it's right for you. I'd really like to see some threads for support for people IN OA and working the program for support. I know you're all out there... I could really use the help. I haven't gotten a good response from some people in OA...I lost my sponsor when I decided to get the surgery. I know thats just her, and I keep on going...

Thank you all.:tongue2:[/quote

My sponsor was very hesitant for me to get the surgery too. But I was having so many health problems plus I thought it would be the magic bullet. I am sorry your sponsor dropped you. Mary

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Hi mary,

I'm sorry to hear that you are having so much trouble but I just want you to know that you are not alone. without the recovery that oa offers, you may never get over the food. compulsive overeating is more than just what we put in our mouths, its a disease. but the good news is that we dont have to live our lives like that anymore if we just choose to start recovering. you've come to the right place. just keep going to meetings and you will see. it does get better.:Dancing_sorry::Dancing_wub:

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Thank you for starting this thread. I had stayed away from this site for awhile because I had discovered I really did have a food addiction. I never believed it until I got banded and then started fighting the band. I thought only "idiots" did that, but now I know the word is "addicts." Being a food addict felt so lonely. I tried to talk to a friend who is in NA and she dismissed my issues as being nothing compared to her addiction. I stopped talking to anyone but I wanted to say, I'd give anything just to stop eating. I know I have a compulsive nature but I stopped drinking and stopped shopping (gave up credit cards) and am very careful not to get addicted to my medications (although Xanax is a struggle). I have been roaming the Internet reading up on FA and then came back here and found this thread. The band helped me lose weight (30 pre-band and 20 post-surgery) and it stops the binge before it can get too out of control. I read last night that it takes 10 days to get out of the addictive behavior loop and today was Day 1 of no sugar. Tomorrow I add flour. I'm not ready to give up coffee, but I'll start looking for an OA meeting. I went to 1 about 20 years ago, but left because I was too proud to think I had anything in common with the OA group.

Thanks for reading this, but I had to get it off my chest. Thanks for letting me know others are fighting FA and balancing the band.

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I was wondering if we could talk a little about how are people working their AO recovery,I missed my meeting Tuesday because one of my kids was sick. I get lost in my Mom world, if I dont stay connected,I forget I have a disease and think I can do it on my own. I thought if I started this thread it could help other people. What are people doing to stay abstinant.or working their program.

Mary

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I haven't started attending meetings yet but am working on removing sugar and chemicals from my diet. I am allowing myself to eat and food that has 1 or 2 natural ingredients. My box of raisins just says "California seedless raisins." I also snack on dry roasted edamame (soybeans) which only contain soybeans and sea salt. I can also eat meat, vegetables, etc. I tried eliminating all flour, but they had a free turkey dinner at work yesterday and I ate the stuffing, etc. But I get my 3rd fill Monday and will ask my doctor to be a little more aggressive with the fill. I am going to try to attend a meeting, but I'm nervous about walking into my first meeting. So many people downplay that FA is an addiction; I feel embarrassed to admit it to anyone.

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I haven't started attending meetings yet but am working on removing sugar and chemicals from my diet. I am allowing myself to eat and food that has 1 or 2 natural ingredients. My box of raisins just says "California seedless raisins." I also snack on dry roasted edamame (soybeans) which only contain soybeans and sea salt. I can also eat meat, vegetables, etc. I tried eliminating all flour, but they had a free turkey dinner at work yesterday and I ate the stuffing, etc. But I get my 3rd fill Monday and will ask my doctor to be a little more aggressive with the fill. I am going to try to attend a meeting, but I'm nervous about walking into my first meeting. So many people downplay that FA is an addiction; I feel embarrassed to admit it to anyone.

It is very hard to go to your first meeting. You will find the courage to go though. You are admitting to yourself that you have a food addiction, so the next step is admitting it to others... My experience has been that you will not be judged. You will be in a place where all others have felt the same way you do. Shame in overeating, fear of not being in control.... all the rest.....

The only thing I am unsure of is how others will react to your banding. You might want to save that bit of information until you feel comfortable with your group.

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hi everyone, I attended my first OA meeting tonight and it was a great experience. It was wonderful to hear other people's stories - people who I never would have guessed had similar issues with food. For the first time in a ver long time, some of my shame around complusive eating didn't feel as heavy.

i haven't been banded yet and I've been worried how I would deal with my emotional eating issues post band(cause couselling and self help books aren't enough). I think that maybe OA might be just the ticket for me... we'll see.

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Hi, I love this thread. I will be banded 12/15/08 and have been back in OA since May. Have lost 48 pounds going to meetings and eating healthy. Have given up white flour and switched to whole grains and have given up sugar--with a few slips, of course. I am a binge eater and food addict. Because I have a sane eating plan, I now dare to have the lap-band procedure--otherwise I could eat despite it and undo it.

There are people in OA who are prejudiced against it but there are many in my area who have had weight loss surgery. I announced it to my home meeting and people have been supportive--even my sponsor. I view this as another tool to help me lose the weight and keep it off--to stay alive and healthy. I know this is just the beginning but believe that with OA and lap-band that I can do this. Working the 12 steps are a joy, and the support of others is a miracle. Thanks, guy, for listening. Kathy

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Oh, one other thing. About my eating plan. After the post-op period I have been told that I will be able to go back to the eating plan I use now, just the portions will be smaller. Kathy:thumbup:

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Hi folks. I recently joined OA on 18 Nov. Deep down I still know wls is needed also. I haven't read the rest of the posts yet but I will. I have an online sponsor but i am struggling. I tried to call her today but couldn't get through, must be busy due to the holidays.:tongue2:

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Thank you! You have no idea how reading tis has helped me! I was banded in Feb 08 and I feel like i have fell off the wagon a little. I felt defeated. After reading this I realize that there are still some things that I need to overcome....thank you.

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Hi Everyone!

I'm scheduled to be banded on 2/18 and am having serious second thoughts. About 5 years ago I was in OA and dropped 75 lbs. I stopped working the program and have slowly put it all back on plus some more. About a year ago I decided I wanted a lap-band. Fast forward to the date of my approval last month, and I've started doubting my decision. All I think of is the food I won't be able to eat anymore! I know I am a compulsive overeater, food addict and am powerless over food. Knowing that, is lapband really a good idea? I know I want to be healthy and regain freedom from compulsion - but I'm not sure this is the best way. Am I being impulsive to think this will be some kind of miracle to make me not want to eat (even though I'm well aware it isn't) - wouldn't it just be best to get back into the rooms and work it naturally? I'm ashamed and embarrassed that I've come this far and now want out! I've told people about my surgery and planned time out of work to accomadate it. What am I going to do? My surgery is all I can think about - it's truly driving me nutty. I've been on my pre-op diet for over a week now, and have majorly cheated twice - a box of oreos on one occasion and another time 2 slices of chocolate cake. If I can't even get through the "diet" how can I get through the new lifestyle??? I'm so sorry for rambling, I'm just so lost in my addict head right now! Can someone help me?

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Hi Everyone!

I'm scheduled to be banded on 2/18 and am having serious second thoughts. About 5 years ago I was in OA and dropped 75 lbs. I stopped working the program and have slowly put it all back on plus some more. About a year ago I decided I wanted a lap-band. Fast forward to the date of my approval last month, and I've started doubting my decision. All I think of is the food I won't be able to eat anymore! I know I am a compulsive overeater, food addict and am powerless over food. Knowing that, is lapband really a good idea? I know I want to be healthy and regain freedom from compulsion - but I'm not sure this is the best way. Am I being impulsive to think this will be some kind of miracle to make me not want to eat (even though I'm well aware it isn't) - wouldn't it just be best to get back into the rooms and work it naturally? I'm ashamed and embarrassed that I've come this far and now want out! I've told people about my surgery and planned time out of work to accomadate it. What am I going to do? My surgery is all I can think about - it's truly driving me nutty. I've been on my pre-op diet for over a week now, and have majorly cheated twice - a box of oreos on one occasion and another time 2 slices of chocolate cake. If I can't even get through the "diet" how can I get through the new lifestyle??? I'm so sorry for rambling, I'm just so lost in my addict head right now! Can someone help me?

Hi Melissa; I can sympathize with your delema.

I was banded 1 1/2 yrs ago and I am too a C.Overeater.

The LAPBAND is around your stomach and NOT your head.

Therefore, you must work your OA program in combination with the lapband.

The lapband will make it easier to eat smaller quantities of the "right" food, But caution! Sugary, Greasy foods SLIDE right thru the band and you can still eat them.

Cookies, pies, Icecream, Fried chicken, F.Fries etc... so don't expect the BAND to stop these foods from going in... they will!!! Its refered to as "eating around the band"....

Even after spending $16,000 on my band I STILL have trouble with the Head Hunger (for junk)...

The band is a "tool" in the weightloss arsenal, not a CURE!

Best of luck

Peaches

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Peaches, thanks so much for your advice and honesty. Sometimes God works in mysterious ways. I was due for surgery today, but because I caught a cold over the weekend they had to cancel it. I'm in the midst of changing jobs and may not be able to work in the surgery. Maybe it's just not the right time.

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Hi Melissa,

I'm sorry your surgery was cancelled because of your cold. The #1 thing to remember is we have all been where you are right now.

Sure, there are things that will slide right through the band and I am definitely addicted to food, but I still managed to lose about 70 lbs. Every day is a new challenge and I have more to lose, but I keep plugging away.

I think the thing that helps me most is making sure I keep the problems foods out of the house. Sure, I slip, but for me finding subsitutions for my fav. foods has helped me a lot. I make diet hot choc. for my choc. craving and drink a lot of chocolate Protein drinks. A good one that I like is Designer whey. I add a little powdered sugar free choc. pudding and tons of ice. If you can get through those nasty cravings you are half way there.

Please don't feel discouraged, we are all in the same boat. You can do it if you follow the lap band rules and keep in VERY Close contact with the weight loss clinic. They help me a lot, even the psychological support is there for us to use.

Private message me if you want. I would be happy to answer any questions for you and best of luck!

:mad2:

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
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      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
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    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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