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In need of motivation BIG STYLE
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crispy98a 1 post
Hi everyone,
I had my band go worng and had a re-surgery on 9th November 2007.
I had 4.5mls put in at the time of surgery and I felt some seious restriction. I still have problems, but because I am 10 months down the track from my initial BUZZ about how COOL this was going to eb and how wonderful and amazing I was gonna look, and all the rules I had to follow.. I am kind of feeling a little deflated. I am eating crap and I just dont know what I am doing. I am sick pretty much every day, and it seems that if I am sick after a few bites, then I can then carry on with the meal. Other than that I have to eat WET food like casserole, stew or noodles with sauce or anything with sauce otherwise I get that choke feeling and have to shove my fingers down my throat.
I am glad I have restriction, but I kind of dont know what to do with myself. I am sitting here 40 minutes after eating 2 forkfulls of rice and sauce, vomiting it back, then having a chunk of chicken and sauce, and vomiting again and I am HUNGRY again.
I cant eat bread or anything dry. I can eat salad and I can eat most everything else, but because I am now so scared of eating anything that is not wet, I am having sauces that are probably loaded with cals.
Someone drag me up by the boot straps and give me a dressing down.
I wish I had never had this donw as it feels like false hope and optomism. I am paranoid about my band breaking again, and just cant take it.
so what do you think...? Should I try and stick with a diet and do this thing too?
Depressed in the UK.:cry