Hello,

My starting weight was 250 and current weight is 124.

I'm new to the forum. I want to remain anonymous at this point and I didn't want to post in facebook. I had my gastric sleeve done in May of 2022, I've lost a total of 125 pounds. The thing I didn't think about was how my self esteem has not changed. I was thinner in my late teens and 20's, but gained weight after having 5 children. I am now in my late 40's, I don't really regret the choice I made about the surgery. The thing I didn't prepare myself for mentally is the depression factor, I had depression prior to surgery and had been on med's. After my surgery I am still on meds, but I feel like things have started to get worse over the last 4-5 months with more weight loss.

I find it very uncomfortable to get attention that I didn't before from males. It get's very uncomfortable to the point where I try to avoid places that have large groups of people. I'm married to a wonderful man for over 20 years, he is so supportive and loving. Once I lost the weight it has turned into more of a focus on my body and how great he tells me I look. Strangers like males coming up to me and asking me for my number, or flirting with me to excess. I don't like it, it makes me beyond anxious and has lead I think to me becoming more depressed. I just want to blend in and not be noticed like I used to be. I know how crazy this sounds but it's difficult for me because I'm very shy especially and I've never liked attention. Sorry this post may sound stupid or pointless but to me I didn't realize I would become more depressed and anxious after I lost weight.

I thought weight loss was going to be an amazing thing, I paid out of pocket for the surgery myself. There is a downside to the weight loss that also no one talks about and it's the hair loss. Your hair get's very thin if you are not maintaining your vitamins. It still becomes thin and falls out due to the stress of the surgery. I'm okay with my hair but the hair loss was unexpected as well. I wanted somewhere I could vent about all this. I feel like the focus is more now on my body and how it looks, especially with my husband. Sometimes it's great but at other times it becomes overwhelming.

I feel like something is wrong with me, I should be happy? I don't crave attention and wanted the surgery to feel healthy and for me. I fear the warm months coming, the summer I hated the most when I was overweight. Now that I've lost the weight I'm also just wanting to go back into that shell and become invisible again, especially around the opposite sex. This is not the part I expected to have to deal with, I forgot how to deal with this type of attention. Maybe this is something that others would love to have, but it can also become overwhelming, very overwhelming. Sorry I'm rambling, just didn't know where else to post this in case my complaining is unjustified and stupid?

Edited April 21, 20233 yr by Khappy77

I find your issues with attention very relatable; I am happily married (and demisexual) and the attention is absolutely unwanted. There are times I wish I could zip my fat back on when I go out alone.