Endless waiting.. Starting to get discouraged - Mini Rant

[greenwitch17 19]

Hi lovely friends!

It has been a while since I posted on here because It seems like everything has REALLY been not wanting me to have this surgery consult. I originally decided on surgery in June of 2021, got my referral, and was all set for my surgical eval for September 1st (long wait for appointments in CA right now). Great! I took the day off work and an hour before my appointment the receptionist calls me from the surgical office and says Dr. had to go due to an emergency - no problem! The only appointment they have now is for September 29th, okay I will take it! Two days before my new appointment I get a call from staff telling me my surgeon will be on medical leave indefinitely and to get a new referral for a new surgeon. SO, I get a new appointment with my PCP, make my new referral, call and they only have appointments in November. November 12th is now my appointment for my first surgical consult with a doctor and I am just feeling so discouraged. The fact that it has taken almost 6 months just to consult has me frustrated and upset. Also, I developed depression about two months ago (being treated, in therapy) so I put on more weight. I just feel like maybe surgery isn't meant for me, or maybe it will be a mistake.

I am just looking for some encouragement and maybe some similar stories to know I am not alone in this frustrating appointment hell! Thank you guys ❤️

[ShoppGirl 5,072]

Try not to be too discouraged. These are the hurdles that your insurance company hopes will make you give up so they don’t have to pay for your surgery. Keep getting treatment for your depression and do the best you can with your weight. I bet once you have a surgery date you will be able to lose a bit if you want to. Be kind to yourself though. Depression is real and weight gain or loss is not at all uncommon. I have actually had it present both ways in myself. When I was younger I would lose weight during bouts of depression but now that I am older and also on medication it makes me gain (not sure if it’s age or the meds that cause it but I can’t change either so I just accept it). I have my fingers crossed for you that your consult appointment goes on as planned and you are able to officially start this journey. Once you are on the other side of surgery looking back you will realize it goes faster than you think. But definitely keep getting treatment for that depression because you want that under control before surgery to give yourself the best chance at losing all your weight post surgery. Keep posting on here too. This is a pretty special community. It’s been very helpful for me. Congratulations on your decision to pursue WLS and best of luck on the next few hurdles. You’ve got this.

[greenwitch17 19]

1 minute ago, ShoppGirl said:

Try not to be too discouraged. These are the hurdles that your insurance company hopes will make you give up so they don’t have to pay for your surgery. Keep getting treatment for your depression and do the best you can with your weight. I bet once you have a surgery date you will be able to lose a bit if you want to. Be kind to yourself though. Depression is real and weight gain or loss is not at all uncommon. I have actually had it present both ways in myself. When I was younger I would lose weight during bouts of depression but now that I am older and also on medication it makes me gain (not sure if it’s age or the meds that cause it but I can’t change either so I just accept it). I have my fingers crossed for you that your consult appointment goes on as planned and you are able to officially start this journey. Once you are on the other side of surgery looking back you will realize it goes faster than you think. But definitely keep getting treatment for that depression because you want that under control before surgery to give yourself the best chance at losing all your weight post surgery. Keep posting on here too. This is a pretty special community. It’s been very helpful for me. Congratulations on your decision to pursue WLS and best of luck on the next few hurdles. You’ve got this.

Wow, this is kind of exactly what I needed to hear... This is why I love this forum! I am actively getting help for the depression because I already know having it and getting surgery will be a crappy mixture haha. I will keep posting as my journey continues! Thank you so much for the support and encouragement!

[lizonaplane 1,613]

It's really frustrating! It happens to a lot of people; it took me 7.5 months to have the surgery, but your delay sounds really unfortunate. As @ShoppGirl said, you will be there before you know it. Work on the depression the best you can with therapy and medication if needed (If you start medication for depression, make sure the doctor tries a medication that is less likely to cause weight gain). I found that once I was set to have surgery, I tried to live a more "bariatric" life, by eating more Protein and fewer carbs and exercising more. It's so hard to do any of this when you're depressed, but at least try upping your protein. It will help you feel less hungry, or at least it did for me. If you can take a walk in the fresh air, it might make you feel better for a bit. (Of course, that depends on your weather... I live in Boston where we have crap weather a lot, so I often walk in the mall!) Stay strong!

[You Are My Sunshine 85]

This whole process has taken me a while. A few years ago I was looking into it (again) and insurance didn't cover. I kept calling every year to see if things changed. Last year they had! I had previously done an "intake" of sorts, just in case they did cover (as advised) and I'm glad I did because I would have been on quite a waiting list as well. I was able to skip ahead quite a bit because I was in the system.

Beyond that, the program for the surgery is six months. After finishing that, I got pneumonia 1 week into my pre-op diet. My surgery was off. I got scheduled again, and got postponed again, and now I'm on my third date, which is in a few days. It's all been pretty frustrating and mentally quite the challenge. A six-month process has taken me well over a year, lol. It's given me more time to prepare, but also more time to worry. I wish I were farther in the healing stage right now, but then I also maybe I'm just right where I need to be?

Hope you get some positive movement forward soon. Hang in there.

[vikingbeast 987]

Don't be discouraged. And don't beat yourself up! Be nice to our friend greenwitch17, she's pretty awesome.

The delays are unfortunate. Did the former office at least get you started on whatever program is needed for your insurance to cover? Some insurances like to see 3 or 6 months of "medically supervised weight loss" 🙄before you can move forward with surgery. Or there are all sorts of other hurdles, like getting sign-off from your psychiatrist, etc.

As for the depression—many of us have been there. I am discovering that my weight was a HUGE part of my depression, both emotionally ("why can't I lose this weight, what is wrong with me") and physically (obesity causes depression which causes obesity, etc., etc., etc.). I am on a quarter dose of my antidepressant which feels liberating because I don't have many bouts of depression anymore even on such a low dose. They're going to try to take me off in a couple of months, and I'm curious whether that will actually happen. (My depression manifests as lethargy and The Impossible Task™.)

You will get there. And we're here for you both now and later. And a year from now you're going to be living your best life, #hotgirlsummer or whatever hashtag we're using next year.

[marjorieredmond 0]

Hi lovely friends!
It has been a while since I posted on here because It seems like everything has REALLY been not wanting me to have this surgery consult. I originally decided on surgery in June of 2021, got my referral, and was all set for my surgical eval for September 1st (long wait for appointments in CA right now). Great! I took the day off work and an hour before my appointment the receptionist calls me from the surgical office and says Dr. had to go due to an emergency - no problem! The only appointment they have now is for September 29th, okay I will take it! Two days before my new appointment I get a call from staff telling me my surgeon will be on medical leave indefinitely and to get a new referral for a new surgeon. SO, I get a new appointment with my PCP, make my new referral, call and they only have appointments in November. November 12th is now my appointment for my first surgical consult with a doctor and I am just feeling so discouraged. The fact that it has taken almost 6 months just to consult has me frustrated and upset. Also, I developed depression about two months ago (being treated, in therapy) so I put on more weight. I just feel like maybe surgery isn't meant for me, or maybe it will be a mistake.
I am just looking for some encouragement and maybe some similar stories to know I am not alone in this frustrating appointment hell! Thank you guys

My daughter tells me everything happens for a reason and she's 33 ...I think about it alot

Sent from my SM-G973W using BariatricPal mobile app

[Jue 73]

Hi I'd been waiting for my OP for a couple of years had two pre ops and then covid hit so that was another year and a half wait and on the 28th of July got a phone call they was doing my OP 23rd August so everything was a rush to get bloods done an Iron infusion to get to the hospital in the morning for 7.30 then the surgeon came up to tell me I might no have it done because he needed an assistant anyway 10 minutes later I had surgery the next day I thought what have I done to myself 10 weeks post OP and I feel brilliant not sure how much I've lost till the end of November but I will let you all know

[DaisyAndSunshine 303]

My first consult was in Oct 2019 and I am finally getting my surgery now Nov, 2021! 🤣

So yeh, I have had to wait a while too. Usual wait in Canada isn't that long, may be 6 months to max a year. But because of COVID, it kept getting delayed. I got my very first date for May 2021, but they had to cancel it ala COVID. Then it was June, 2021. Again, cancelled. Finally got it for September, 2021 but I was already in school and it would have been difficult to handle surgery and full course load with tons of group work and back to back assignments/exams. So had to postpone it, delay yet again. And finally for the FOURTH time, here I am getting ready for the surgery, Nov 16th 2021 and on the pre-Op diet 🤣🤣🤣

So don't get discouraged. Things happen when they are bound to happen and when it's the right time for you.

Keep your spirits high and hope for the best. It'll pass and there will be a light at the end of the tunnel!

Edited November 13, 2021 by DaisyAndSunshine

[PinkIvy 0]

Hi everyone well I know about waiting and being discouraged. I started this journey all most 2yrs ago I was halted by COVID. No calls from anyone I had to call and break down the timeline to start things rolling again these past 3 - months. To just recently had a video visit where I sat in the chat room for over an hour for the surgeon not to show. I'm trying to stay motivated and calm. However, I just don't want any more setbacks. But we have to keep each other going, we will make it!

[Jue 73]

Hi I'd been waiting for my OP for a couple of years had two pre ops and then covid hit so that was another year and a half wait and on the 28th of July got a phone call they was doing my OP 23rd August so everything was a rush to get bloods done an Iron infusion to get to the hospital in the morning for 7.30 then the surgeon came up to tell me I might no have it done because he needed an assistant anyway 10 minutes later I had surgery the next day I thought what have I done to myself 10 weeks post OP and I feel brilliant not sure how much I've lost till the end of November but I will let you all know

[Jue 73]

I've finally seen the Dietician he says I'm doing well 45lbs down and feeling great