lizonaplane

I haven't had surgery yet, but I have been doing A LOT of researching about how important exercise is to prevent re-gain. I have traditionally been very down on any exercise except walking because it's so hard for me. I'm down 32 lbs as I prepare for surgery and today I did a 15 minute dance exercise video without stopping! It wasn't pretty, I didn't get all the moves right, but I did the whole thing!

I've only lost 30 lbs and I haven't had surgery yet, but I just noticed this yesterday. My shoelaces came untied and I didn't have to sit down to tie them; I just bent over and I didn't want to vomit!

Maybe YOU feel better when people are giving you tough love, but most people do not. Most people find "supportive" comments make them more inclined to change their behavior. And, you were probably struggling with your weight for years before surgery. Did anyone "telling you the truth about how you're doing everything wrong" cause you to meaningfully start eating healthier and exercising more? If it did, you wouldn't have ended up getting surgery.
There is so much scientific literature that shows that BULLYING is not helpful. Telling people that they MUST be doing everything wrong or else they'd have great results is NEVER going to make someone change their behavior, and it ASSUMES that there is something wrong with what they are doing.
Since you are not their doctor and have not examined them, and you do not follow them around all day watching what they eat and do, you can only assume that she is doing everything wrong; you really have no evidence, and I know there are a lot of people who do everything right and still don't loose much weight.

JUST STOP BEING MEAN AND UNHELPFUL

Sacrifices DO suck, but that's called being an adult. I don't want to do my expense reports but I have to if I want to keep my job. I don't want to do my laundry or take a shower, but I have to because that's what an adult does.
I HATE exercise, but I do it anyway, because it gets me to my goals. I miss eating big desserts and big meals, definitely. If you're looking for sympathy, you've got mine.
But... if you want your outcomes to change, you have to change your inputs

1. Restaurants: I eat out about 90% of my meals because I travel for work. I just think carefully about what I'm eating and I stop when I've had enough.
2. Sweets: You just... have to make some changes in order to get the results you want. I have always had a sweet tooth, made worse by medications I take for bipolar disorder... but... I try not to eat sweets much now, and when I do, I use sugar free sweets or have a tiny piece. I CAN eat too much sweets without my restriction kicking in. It's up to me to make the choice that aligns with my goals for long term weight loss
3. Nice food: I love nice food. I just don't need to make it the only thing in my life anymore. I enjoy almost all of my meals, especially when I can enjoy them with friends or family, but it's not the only thing in my life (and I'm Italian!).

It kinda sounds like you want to have your cake and eat the whole thing - you can't eat every single thing as much as you want and lose weight, and only have a surgery that is less effective, and not take time off from work, and not like fat people and not weigh your food... We all want it all, but it's just not possible. I would love to have NOT had this surgery that makes me uncomfortable all the time. But I wanted to be thin. I think you really haven't made up your mind what it is you want yet.

You're not helpful. Most people do not find being told they're doing everything wrong helpful in any way shape or form. Most people find supportive comments more helpful in changing their behavior then "tough love".
And... YOU ARE NOT HER DOCTOR.

Don't worry about @Tony B - NJ. He just likes to be unhelpful and mean. Get back in touch with your surgery center and see what they say.

I weigh 250 and my clothes are 24 and 2x or 3x. I don't understand womens sizes at all.

This... I'm so excited so I am telling people who don't need to know! I'm not ashamed; I feel like I'm doing something to take care of my health. But I see people here who've had very unsupportive family, friends, and partners, so I can certainly understand why people wouldn't feel the same way as I do. I'm single, I don't have kids, and my parents are really supportive - they're even coming up to stay with me for a few weeks during and after surgery (they will be staying at a hotel because my apartment is too small for three people, so it's not simple to do that). My brother was really concerned but it seemed to be about COVID and now that I'm vaccinated, I think he's probably okay (although when he had spinal surgery in college I was terrified, so maybe we're just really protective of each other).

I haven't had surgery yet, but I have been doing A LOT of researching about how important exercise is to prevent re-gain. I have traditionally been very down on any exercise except walking because it's so hard for me. I'm down 32 lbs as I prepare for surgery and today I did a 15 minute dance exercise video without stopping! It wasn't pretty, I didn't get all the moves right, but I did the whole thing!

I don't either. I hate when people tell random other people on the internet to give it to god or to pray. Why do they assume we believe in god???
But, you sound borderline suicidal and I suggest you might need to reach out to someone URGENTLY!
Please get help. Feeling like you want to die is NOT a normal reaction to WLS. Regret is common, but you sound like you are in crisis.
Good luck!

I don't either. I hate when people tell random other people on the internet to give it to god or to pray. Why do they assume we believe in god???
But, you sound borderline suicidal and I suggest you might need to reach out to someone URGENTLY!
Please get help. Feeling like you want to die is NOT a normal reaction to WLS. Regret is common, but you sound like you are in crisis.
Good luck!

I haven't had surgery yet, but I have been doing A LOT of researching about how important exercise is to prevent re-gain. I have traditionally been very down on any exercise except walking because it's so hard for me. I'm down 32 lbs as I prepare for surgery and today I did a 15 minute dance exercise video without stopping! It wasn't pretty, I didn't get all the moves right, but I did the whole thing!

Last week I went on vacation with my parents and usually when I go on vacation I gain 5-10 lbs. We were eating out every meal and my mom likes to make a big deal out of food and finding special restaurants. I was really worried, but I shared meals with my mom, tracked my food as best as I could, and we exercised a LOT (hiking, walking, and swimming most days).
I gained 0.6 lbs, and that includes a pizza party the day after we got home with my cousin, where I only ate one piece of pizza and instead filled up on veggies and salad (I did eat dessert; I'm not perfect!). I'm pre-op, so anything I can train myself into now, rather than having food funerals, makes me happy!

I haven't had surgery yet, but I have been doing A LOT of researching about how important exercise is to prevent re-gain. I have traditionally been very down on any exercise except walking because it's so hard for me. I'm down 32 lbs as I prepare for surgery and today I did a 15 minute dance exercise video without stopping! It wasn't pretty, I didn't get all the moves right, but I did the whole thing!

I haven't had surgery yet, but I have been doing A LOT of researching about how important exercise is to prevent re-gain. I have traditionally been very down on any exercise except walking because it's so hard for me. I'm down 32 lbs as I prepare for surgery and today I did a 15 minute dance exercise video without stopping! It wasn't pretty, I didn't get all the moves right, but I did the whole thing!

I'm going to have to create a workout play list. I usually listen to podcasts when on the bike or elliptical or treadmill or walking outside, but I do want music for my HIIT/weight training. I always put my iTunes on shuffle all but there's some really random stuff in there, mostly a lot of showtunes and folk music, none of which is great for a work out...?‍♂️

I know it's really common to be cold after bariatric surgery. I've been cold all the time MY WHOLE LIFE. Now that I'm down over 100lbs it's becoming impossible. Today, I'm wearing a silk long sleeve undershirt, a long sleeve knit shirt, and a fleece, plus dress pants, thick socks, and short boots. I AM SO COLD! It's especially terrible when I have to sit still during work.
Has anyone found a good solution?

Sometimes you have to do things other people don't agree with. It's hard, and you can try to educate her by having her read asmbs.org (lots of good resources). It's definitely not easy. I've been struggling and I haven't even had any complications! It's not guaranteed that you will keep your weight off with surgery, but you have no chance if you don't have surgery. (I lost 100 lbs 7 years ago but in 5 years gained almost all of it back; I knew I needed surgery to get a re-set on my metabolism.
But no matter how much research you show her, she may not be willing to support you, and you may have to decide to do it anyway. I am super close to my mom, so whenever I have to do something she disagrees with, it breaks my heart. But I would have done this even if my parents didn't agree. Fortunately, they were very supportive.
Good luck to you!

I didn't have a recliner, but I did have a wedge pillow and slept on my back, which I don't normally do. It was hard to get up out of bed and the wedge pillow helped.
I would have liked a belly binder because when I was walking around my belly moved and my incisions hurt. Some surgery centers provide these.
Also, I would say to have your house clean and laundry and dishes done because it will be hard to do these right after surgery.
I found it easier to get my fluids in when I kept a water bottle right in my hand or right next to me on the couch.
Good luck!

I've only lost 30 lbs and I haven't had surgery yet, but I just noticed this yesterday. My shoelaces came untied and I didn't have to sit down to tie them; I just bent over and I didn't want to vomit!

I've only lost 30 lbs and I haven't had surgery yet, but I just noticed this yesterday. My shoelaces came untied and I didn't have to sit down to tie them; I just bent over and I didn't want to vomit!

I'm 9 months out and I haven't felt like I've had more energy than before surgery until this week. I feel restless if I don't get enough exercise, and I want to work out twice a day. I'm trying to be careful and vary the exercise from day to day so I don't get injured, and I still have a tendency to inertia, but it's definitely a huge change.
I notice since I'm losing weight my Apple Watch tells me I'm burning fewer calories for the same amount of exercise ? I know that's to be expected, but it's getting harder and harder to get to 500 calories burned in a day.
Do you get hungry from exercise? I only find I am hungrier after swimming.

How long ago did you have surgery? If it's in the last month or so, what you're feeling is completely normal; many people have "buyer's remorse" after surgery. I sure did! I couldn't eat anything without pain and nothing tasted good for three months or so. By about 4 months out, I started to enjoy eating again. I can eat pretty much anything now at nine months out, though smaller portions. Which is exactly what I wanted. I could eat beef stew with rice (although, I'm not a fan of rice!). I just have to be careful not to eat junk food, which I can eat too much of too easily.
This is a very hard process and I recommend you meet with a bariatric therapist.
My family and I really enjoy going out to eat and trying new foods when we travel. We still do that, I just don't finish everything now. You will still be able to enjoy your husband's cooking. I think I appreciate food more now because I'm actually savoring it, not just inhaling it.
I think it will get better for you.

Sacrifices DO suck, but that's called being an adult. I don't want to do my expense reports but I have to if I want to keep my job. I don't want to do my laundry or take a shower, but I have to because that's what an adult does.
I HATE exercise, but I do it anyway, because it gets me to my goals. I miss eating big desserts and big meals, definitely. If you're looking for sympathy, you've got mine.
But... if you want your outcomes to change, you have to change your inputs