Do you just want to share???

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

Cagstorm...

One other thought. Ever talked to a young'in and knew that in time with experience and age they would feel differently about a given situation?

In many ways you are the young'in here. I have a hunch with time you might feel differently.

[TxArcher 2]

Keep in mind, you are a newbie. With "newbie'dom" there comes this attitude that you are so excited for your upcoming future that you want the rest of the world to share the same experiences, the same shot at TRUE and FOREVER weight loss. It's seriously hard to overcome that feeling in the beginning.

Part of it is the honeymoon stage. It's not a bad thing, it just is. Actually, I think it's a good thing we experience it.

True, true. I am a newbie, surgically speaking. However, that said, It was over 3 years ago that I began my journey to get to the point I am today. I have done my research, comparisons, other diets, etc. I am excited about the life I will attain in the future. I agree there is a bit of a honeymoon stage that I am sure will wear off. I will have to learn to live with my band. (even with its unpleasing parts sometimes)

I just hope and pray that my excitement for helping others NEVER wains. I feel like I am a nurturer by heart and I want to be able to help people in pain somewhere down the line. I, however, DO NOT have intentions of intentionally hurting anyone. That would be counter-intuitive.

WOW. this is by far the BEST discussion I have ever had on ANY forum and I am active in several different forums! I appreciate the open-minded atmosphere I find on LBT. Not that I am calling it quits on this conversation, I just need to go to bed soon! Gotta get the fam. up and go to Sunday-School and Worship! I am excited... last Sunday, I was still doped up on Hydrocodone. EEK!

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

True, true. I am a newbie, surgically speaking. However, that said, It was over 3 years ago that I began my journey to get to the point I am today. I have done my research, comparisons, other diets, etc. I am excited about the life I will attain in the future. ...

I think fat people tend to stick together in a sense. We defend one another, we stick up for one another, we relate to one another. We want EVERYONE to experience true and forever weight loss. We don't want weight loss for ourselves in a selfish way by saying we ONLY want it for ourselves, the unique thing we seem to share is that we want it for EVERYONE.

Personally, I want the whole whole banded, even the skinny people so they never get fat. But there is a thing about the honeymoon stage. I think it is an important part in WLS, an important part of the journey. But it does seem to fade a bit when reality kicks in. The research part, the insurance BS... not the same. It has nothing to do with the honeymoon stage.

I suspect that pretty soon you'll go through the stage of advertising for your doc. After all, he made this possible!! He changed your life forever and in a positive way and you want everyone to experience the same thing you have, a SAFE and effective surgery. I think we all pretty well go through that stage too. With time you realize that your doc merely knows how to wrap a band around your stomach, not rocket science. And you realize that lots of docs are quite good and they wrap bands around stomachs well too. That was an eye opener for me in the beginning.

It's easy for me to sit here and look back and see you where I was a year ago. It's a completely different story to expect you to see yourself a year from now experiencing what I am.

You know, I have to tell you. When you get to goal you are a newbie ALL over again. You see a newbie doing something really stupid, something that could risk their band and you are all over them like stink on pooh because you are ANGRY that they are not taking full advantage of such a fantastic opportunity. They could trash their opportunity because they can't see the value in GOAL! I am a newbie in the honeymoon stage too. But mine is an "at goal" newbie. It's the same thing as what you are going through but today I can see it much more clearly than I could in the beginning.

I don't know, not sure I am explaining my thoughts well on this one. Suffice it to say, I totally understand where you are coming from as I am experiencing it again at my own stage in this journey. I look at people like Jacquie or Chickie and I know they have to read my posts sometimes and roll their eyes hoping I'll complete this stage soon. However, they are tactful enough not to say so.

Point being, I get it. I totally understand your feelings right now. They are good, keep the spirit and keep the attitude.

[lindata 1]

Cagstorm, I think you have something in the gender thing. It seems that guys don't easily get offended at the same things that gals do.

I know I would be embarassed if someone came up to me and pointed out the fact I'm fat. I went around for years knowing I was X pounds overweight, but didn't FEEL fat. If I were at a mall and saw myself in a mirror out of the corner of my eye, I thought who is that, then was mortified to figure out it was ME I was looking at. I was in my magic bubble, my fat-free bubble, where in my little world I was still thin and cute, then I'd see a picture of how I really looked and it would all come crashing down. So if some stranger walked up to me, however well-meaning, and suggested WLS, I think I would have eaten myself into a coma.

I was VERY lucky that my s-i-l had it done, and explained it all to me. I knew all about bypass, but had never heard of lapband. I wasn't even considering surgery, just thought I was always going to be fat. I had resigned myself to it. But just seeing her transformation, and talking more and more to her, and then doing more research on my own I decided I had to give it a shot.

I think just being open about it to people, not necessarily SUGGESTING they should have it done, but just letting the info out that you've had the surgery when people ask how you lost the weight, you'll probably change quite a few people's lives that way, just through word of mouth.

And if you REALLY want people to approach you, have a T-shirt made up with your before and after pics on it!

[kacee 3]

Okay, if you really want to stick your neck out...how about a t-shirt that says "Ask me about my lapband." Boy if that isn't opening the door I don't know what is! You'd probably get some response there!

[Chickie 15]

To all those that have accomplished their goal weight loss, or those that are just at am MUCH more healthy weight...

When you see someone that is MO, do you have an urge well up in you to share your experience with them? I know it may be rude... "hey, I see that your MO, let me explain some options available to you."

I just got banded, and I find myself thinking this way. I can't imagine how hard it will be for me to keep to myself and not offend people later down the road when I am at or near (at least) my goal weight!

If you have ever spoke to someone "cold" (unsolicited) give us some examples of how it went! Maybe if enough of us bandsters step outside of our comfort zones and get creative with our "presentation" to people, we could really help thousands of MO people get on to MUCH healthier and happier lives!

Part of me does. But weight loss is a lot like religion and politics (in that they are a deeply personal thing), and no one like to be preached at (and that's how it always felt to me when someone would say "I lost xxlbs on this diet, you should try it). So I refrain.

If people who know me from "before" want to know how I did it, I share, but otherwise, I don't say anything.

[mendypoo 0]

2 years ago I'm sitting in Vegas feeling really good about myself. Here with hubby, great vacation and I've just hit the lost 70lb mark. Got into a conversation with a woman next to me at the casino and she proceeded to ask me questions about how I felt about myself and if I'd ever thought about WLS. I politely told her that I knew all about that type of surgery and that I'd just sucessfully lost some weight doing JC and I was feeling really good about myself thank you very much. I was not impressed that she approached me. I feel that that type of advertising should be left to billboards and TV. If you want to share with someone you know or a group of people that expect you to talk about WLS go for it. It really bothered me what she said. I'd worked so hard, and she belittled all the great effort I'd put into losing weight without even being aware of it.

[mss 1]

Maybe it is a gender thing as I would also feel embarassed and upset if a stranger approached me and started telling me about their lap band or other weight loss ideas. I believe that people will start investigating options when they are ready to do so and that it would be disrespectful of me to make that decision on their behalf.

A couple of what if's - what if the person you talk to has had a failed lap band or they are unable to have the surgery due to medical reasons, financial reasons or other reasons? Having a stranger mention their successful lapband experience may bring up painful memories.

I like the t shirt idea though I probably would be worried that the person is going to try and sell me something...but that is probably me being cynical.

I admire your desire to help people ...my personal view is that it is important to let others make the decision on when and if they wish to be helped.

[musicalmomma 1]

Okay, if you really want to stick your neck out...how about a t-shirt that says "Ask me about my lapband." Boy if that isn't opening the door I don't know what is! You'd probably get some response there!

I'm glad you posted this! I was thinking the same thing...a t-shirt! That way, people that want the info/help get it, but no one is accused of being fat.

A friend of mine is big into Medifast...she's lost over 100 lbs on it and now sells it...she wears a t-shirt that says, "I've lost over 100 pounds, ask me how". She get A LOT of response! Also, she does have a before and after shot on a business card...she leaves it in various dressing rooms, Lane Bryant, Avenue...etc...she's had some response from that too. Both are good ways to 'advertise' our band without saying "hey, I noticed you're MO, I'd like to help".

OH...you can also have a car magnet made up with a before and after shot and say "ask me how"...that will also get response...

[anonemouse 1]

I would LOVE to be able to share the lap-band with every fat person I see. In fact, I have a student right now that I would love to share my story with, because I think she could benefit. But then I think about how I would have reacted if, before the band, a person came up to me and said something along the lines of, "Hey, I just wanted to share with you the benefits of exercise. I lost X pounds exercizing every day, and I bet you could too if you exercised! Please, look into exercise, you could lose a lot of weight with it!" I would have been humiliated, pissed off, hurt, you name it. It doesn't matter how well-meaning the people are, they're still sticking their noses where they don't belong.

[Jachut 487]

Unfortunately, I'm a bit like a reformed smoker.

I see morbid obesity and I want to feel sympathetic but in truth, I find it very confronting. I also feel (quite unjustifiably) that I got too fat and I got off my ass and did something about it. Why cant they? Why should they get my sympathy if they cant help themselves?

I can be like that here. I moved more and ate less, I have very little patience with other people's struggles. I found it pretty straightforward, I did what I knew I should and it worked.

That's because I dont understand the disease that is morbid obesity. I just dont get it, I've never suffered it, I was a person whose lifestyle got a little crazy and out of control and whose weight got away from her a bit. I really had it very very easy compared to a lot of people here.

But I've got enough sensitivity to not be totally ignorant, to treat people badly, to discriminate or to think they'd actually like to be told by my skinny ass that they should do this to lose weight. I would have snotted someone who said that to me.

[OH Juli 15]

MYOB, is about all I can say. Worry about yourself and other people will come to you if they need your opinions.