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Did it for a couple of reasons. I considered it multiple times, but was always a bit afraid, but after some health concerns I knew this was the next route. 

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I honestly thought that I could do it on my own without surgery. After all I was already starting to lose and years ago I worked my butt off and got down to where I wanted to be. Of course had I stayed there I wouldn't be in the position where I needed to be losing weight again. I'm also much older now and while I was still considered healthy (aside from my weight) some things were starting to head in the wrong direction. My wife really wanted me to look into it for myself, for her, and for our children so I started doing some research. Based on everything I read and heard, plus knowing my previous history of struggle and loss and regain I decided that it was worth giving it a shot. So far it has absolutely been worth it for me and everyone close to me.

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I am still pre-op, waiting on final approval from insurance, and getting very anxious. Mournful even, of the life I live now, and the foods I enjoy that I won’t enjoy again.
but this thread helps. I’m generally healthy, no issues with BP, cholesterol, GERD, heart or cardiac, only issues areI’m creeping ever closer to diabetes. I want that off the table. And I have sleep apnea. Super low pressure (7 on a scale of 5-30) and can easily be reversed with just 50-75 lbs lost. I’m 34 and want children one day. I want to hike and ride bikes and run and sit comfortably on the floor, play with my nieces and not be exhausted after ONE round of hide and seek, rid myself of back pain, fit into regular sized clothes, wear heels without wanting to cry.
Men reach out very very often on dating apps and I always “self reject” because something in my mind says “he must be joking” or “your body is just a fetish to him.” Maybe I’m way off base with that one but it’s how I feel and I want to be romantically involved with someone again.
I want to sit comfortably in airplanes and not see the “oh God I hope the fat girl doesn’t sit by me” face I often see. Don’t want to hear the “wow you have such a pretty face” comment, knowing what they really mean. (I hope I don’t sound self centered, just highlighting that it’s hard to appreciate things that others seemingly appreciate about me because of my deep insecurity.)

Just so many things. As nervous and sad as I am to have to get to this point to lose weight, I’m still looking forward to all of the above. 🌸

Edited by LizzLosingIt

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On 5/9/2021 at 1:28 AM, LizzLosingIt said:

Men reach out very very often on dating apps and I always “self reject” because something in my mind says “he must be joking” or “your body is just a fetish to him.” Maybe I’m way off base with that one but it’s how I feel and I want to be romantically involved with someone again.

Interesting... I'm single and thoughts like yours have crept into my mind, too. I'd think something like, "He must be one of those 'chubby chasers' so he must be a weirdo." Of course, it really should be no more "weird" for men to enjoy chubby bodies than to enjoy slim bodies... the whole slim is best thing is social conditioning. But despite knowing that, I still couldn't get my head to accept that a "normal" man would enjoy my admittedly more-than-just-chubby body.

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I chose to do the surgery because I was tired of being held back, energy-wise, by carrying two of me around everywhere.

I'm an aspiring filmmaker and photographer. I've been at this for 3 years, and my weight was holding me back because I would go into a shoot knowing that I had a finite amount of energy to work with and I better make it count. I had to tap out early from a once-in-a-lifetime shoot over the summer because after I had dragged all my gear up the stairs I was too tired and sore to keep going for much longer. I fainted while taking a friend's wedding photos over the summer because I overheated.

Additionally, my content is on YouTube and I was constantly worried that someone would discover my "dirty secret"--that the "Betty Badass" urban explorer they were watching was morbidly obese. I'd go out of my way to edit around portions of my footage where you could see my reflection in shop windows, etc, because I didn't want to be made fun of. My fear of my own camera kept me from connecting with my audience.

I decided to appear on camera for the first time two weeks after my surgery--I told myself it was time to be fearless and if someone had something to say, they can watch me shrink over the next year and eat their words. I managed to accumulate about 3-4 months of content before my surgery that I'll be putting together while I'm recovering, and I can't wait to hit the road again. I can't wait to be able to actually ride my motorcycle. I can't wait to not get winded going up stairs.

If I can survive this process, I can survive anything. There have been moments since the surgery I've felt like I was walking barefoot through hell, but I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I know how indestructible I am now.

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So I can be around longer for my children and be around for my future grandchildren. I also wanted to be healthy and not short of breath all the time. I was 349lbs in March 2021 and started my gastric sleeve journey May 14 (342lbs) and I’m 271 and about to have surgery Nov 15. I’m so excited!!

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I did it to get my life back. I didn't want to waste any more years of what's left of my life as a self-loathing shut-in, which is what I'd allowed myself to become.

And it's already working. My self esteem is slowly returning, my energy is back, my happiness is growing. I can see the sunrise on the horizon for the first time in 17 years.

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Mine was embarrassment and concern about if I were ever to become ill and needed EMS to lift me up on a guerney to transport me to the hospital that they wouldn't be able to lift me.

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I was always underweight and never had a problem my entire life. 5 kids and still perfect weight could eat whatever until 2018 I was in a bad accident had emergency surgery on my neck and was on steroids for a year. Got up to 245 - 100 pounds heavier than I had ever been. I went raw vegan and lost 20-25 pounds then Covid hit and I was scared to eat raw vegis. I live in the Rocky’s so really can’t get outside year round and we moved in the middle of nowhere and I couldn’t go to the gym every day. I have myself this year to get under 200 and I tried and tried. Ended up with type 2 diabetes and Sept 1 I said enough is enough and called a weight loss surgeon. The rest is history. I’m hoping this works I miss riding horses, bikes, hiking in the mountains and all the things I loved all my life. This was not an easy choice for me but my dad died of type 2 diabetes at 59 he was thin and active. He had 2 brothers that were juvenile diabetes. It is strong in my family. I want to be here for my 5 kids and 6 grandkids longer than my Dad was here for us. I turn 53 next month. My husband of over 2 decades wasn’t happy with it but in the end he supported me and stayed with me 24/7 in the hospital. He has been my biggest supporter and tells me daily I’m a hottie. I know it was hard for him to have this athletic wife who was active and thin and see me almost die and watch me struggle like I have for the past 4 years. I’m so glad we have this group because it helped me decide that the sleeve was the best choice for me l. This wasn’t about vanity or the easy way out this for me was a choice to live or die. I want to live and this will help me get there and be here for my loved ones.

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I watched my father die over a 10 year period after a stroke when he was only 56. He didn’t take care of himself. That will not be me. I will do this, become healthy and be around to take care of my family.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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