Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

The changes we don't talk about



Recommended Posts

Body dysmorphia is definitely a problem for me! I literally have to tell myself "my size 4 jeans are now too loose, I couldn't possibly look fat in them!" My XS scrubs I wear to work are loose. Still, I can't pick out someone that I think is my size. I guess I really have no concept of my size!
Wow.
How much have you lost?

Sent from my SM-N960F using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My husband doesnt understand just how real the body dysmorphia truly is. He think i am fishing for compliments. I REALLY dont see my size in the mirror. I am in size 8 pants and small/medium tops. I honestly didnt see myself as big as I was before surgery either. My brain is messed up.

I knew about the skin issues going in but I always thought "better loose skin than folds of fat"...well yes and no. i hate all the skin.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am pre-surgery. I really appreciate you all sharing your stories. I am learning so much reading these forums and this thread is one of the best. As I am going through this process, I mostly hear good things and very little discussion of the negative. It seems that most of you are saying that if you have the problem prior to surgery, you will have the same problem after. Surgery doesn't heal the way we think about ourselves.

I have body dysmorphia. I still get shocked when I see pictures of my self, because I don't see how large I am when I look in the mirror. The first time a doctor labeled me morbidly obese I cried for days. I have been fat most of my life, but the words morbid and obese were very hard to take.

One thing that I worry about a lot is how I will look when I have lost the weight. The loose skin. My husband said that he is worried that I will get thin and leave him. I said most likely I will look like an old elephant with all of the hanging skin. My boobs will probably look like balloons that have been blown up and the air let out too many times.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My weight shot up so quickly (Chemo, quitting drinking & excessive popcorn really accelerated my weight) I didn’t recognize myself, and I had never been so uncomfortable. I had gained some weight over 8 years or so, I felt “fat” at 160 then, boom, one year later I was at 22-something. I qualified for surgery by 1-2 pounds. It was shocking to look in the mirror. I made an appointment and had surgery 5 months later. I just feel like myself again, and it turns out I really missed me!

I had transfer addiction kinda backwards, which also led to my weight gain. Before surgery I drank a lot of wine daily when I was stressed, (aka Everyday) which helped add pounds. I quit drinking 5 years ago and I don’t miss it. I really thought I would, it was a big part of my social life and stress reliever for me. Turns out I didn’t need it. **However, I replaced my nightly wine with popcorn...that didn’t work out and compounded my weight gain as you can imagine. Alcohol and popcorn are two things I will live without. I quit smoking 22 years ago, and I’m not touching that again either.

I began painting (not art) after surgery to keep busy and now I’m looking for a new hobby. I’m planning on trying out woodworking when the weather is better. I’m the type of person who needs to be busy.

I’m lucky, I have a super supportive husband, I feel terrible for those of you with a partner who isn’t your biggest cheerleader. You deserve that.

I shop less than I used to. I was always buying clothes to make me look less fat or replace things that got too tight. Now with the plague, I have nowhere to go and my closet is so organized! That’s why I don’t post on OTTD anymore, I’m wearing the same things! 😂

I do freak out a little bit if I see the scale hit 125, I don’t vary my diet a lot, but I’m comfortable with my diet. It’s a mix of good for me and eh, not so good for me. I really have a hard time splurging on food. I’ll have just a bit of something that’s really caloric.

I do log everything, I simply have to. I’ve had real pizza a few times and a small thin crust pizza lasts 4 meals. I can live with that.

I joke that I’ve quit smoking, drinking and eating, so now what? ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Sam B said:

Can I switch from VSG to RNY? I just changed my mind.

Ask your Doctor, she or he will let you know what they think. Do research before you ask so you know what to ask for follow up questions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, Pookie2012 said:

One thing that I worry about a lot is how I will look when I have lost the weight. The loose skin. My husband said that he is worried that I will get thin and leave him. I said most likely I will look like an old elephant with all of the hanging skin. My boobs will probably look like balloons that have been blown up and the air let out too many times.

You will be adding years to your life. I only have one boob! 😂 In all seriousness, I don’t have the skin issue so I don’t know how uncomfortable it is, but I do believe everyone. At my age I looked at it as a health issue along with the fact I was losing my mind and stamina. I can keep up with everyone again and life is just more fun, and next year will even be better. Be kind to yourself, you deserve this.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 11/30/2020 at 10:15 AM, ms.sss said:

SMOKING:

I started smoking again on vacation last sept after being smoke free for 11 YEARS. I said it would just be on vacation, which led to just finish this pack I brought home with me, to just while its warm outside, to basically smoking as if I never stopped all these years. Slippery slope indeed. I made 2-3 attempts to quit during the past year+ but if I'm honest, I haven't tried so very hard. Am still smoking.

DRINKING:

On paper, apparently I am an "excessive drinker" now. I was a "social drinker" pre-wls, maybe 3-4 drinks a MONTH, max. This slowing started increasing since last summer, to where I was drinking maybe 2-3 drinks a WEEK by Christmas. Always when I was out, or at a party.

Now (especially since pandemic started) I drink pretty much everyday, and at home. According to literature, "excessive drinking" in women is when 7 or more drinks are consumed in a week. Yep, that's me. On paper, based on what I've been reading, I just barely fit the criteria of being a High Functioning Alcoholic. Barely, but I do fit. Am still drinking.

OBSESSION PREOCCUPATION with food:

This one I don't consider to be too damaging, but it is a little eyebrow-raising. I think about food probably 1/2 of my waking hours. The things I find I spend ALOT of time on and/or get actual pleasure from: spending time looking at food pics, organizing the pics and Urls based on interest, planning and shopping for meals, cooking/baking, plating food, taking pics of the finished product, watching people eat it, smelling it, reading an ENTIRE menu to the last detail often multiple times, ordering off said menu, having Food Network on TV as my background noise. Actually EATING the food is very low on the enjoyment priority scale. Sure I'll eat/taste something if I deem it "worthy", but more often than not, I'd rather do any number of the former things instead. Am still preoccupied with food.

See me after class. 😂

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

14 hours ago, sach1 said:

Wow.
How much have you lost?

Sent from my SM-N960F using BariatricPal mobile app

After my RNY-120 lbs, but from my highest weight about 3 yrs prior to RNY I've lost 133 lbs!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

4 months post op now. XL to small size now. Presently doing strength training. Pass menapause stage that increased weight to severe obesity stage with apnea. I feel healthier and this was my goal from the beginning. I was told one year after surgery for my body to make changes before considering plastic surgery. I take it one day at a time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Cheeseburgh said:

See me after class. 😂

You just gave me flashbacks of my school days. 😬🤣

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 11/30/2020 at 7:04 AM, GradyCat said:

I'm two years post-op as well. I thought it was COVID but maybe it's related that I too have been online shopping a lot lately. I returned to "grazing" during COVID and gained 12 pounds, but I've lost half of them back again and I really appreciate my small stomach keeping me from being able to eat too much or the wrong things. Even when I "graze" it's healthy things and my macros are in line for losing weight. So I'm happy. My problem is just the opposite. Even when I was huge I never saw it. I don't see my fat. I think I'm "average" but I'm still "large." My body dysmorphia must be dyslexic. 😀

Mine is dyslexic too

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 12/08/2020 at 18:46, Sam B said:

Can I switch from VSG to RNY? I just changed my mind.

I switched from sleeve to bypass 1 month before surgery. I’m very happy with my change and bypass recovery has been very straight forward no issues for me. No issues in food reintroduction either. It works! 22 lbs down in 3 weeks.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×