Jump to content
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Friendship Only/ Dating "Limbo" for some of us WLS'ers?

Recommended Posts

Is anyone in this similar predicament? You want to make new friends, or possibly date, or find a non sexual activity pal to work out at the gym or attend a concert or go to a gallery or arcade or bowling, or movies etc.. But it's difficult if you're not the club/ bar type and you're not the "hook up"/ "speed bump" type. Also if you're PostOp, have lost a considerable amount, but still have a ways to go, if you choose to search online, where do you sign up? You've dropped from ssbbw---> bbw stage or bbw---> plus size thus far but still losing weight & apparel sizes; you sure as heck don't want to register on a BBW date site because they're either feeders and/ or fetishists, just want sex or want to debate why you went through the procedure & make you feel low.

And it's purgatory dealing with the "regular" sites, even if you state clearly you had WLS to essentially help save & prolong your life so you can LIVE a healthier, more active & fulfilling one when traditional methods failed for many yrs/ decades, and even if you lost the weight & they see your most current pics, you're still "not what they expected", you may even still be a tad limited in what you can do physically, they still ask impertinent/ rude questions or comments. So you spend the meet/ greet over coffee or someplace lighthearted & neutral (if u decide to meet them) essentially defending your decision. Some are absolutely against surgical weight loss interventions for one inane or out dated reason or another. Ughhhh!!!

And there's no one remotely of interest or availability at my local WLS Support group meetings at my surgeon's office.

Then we're caught between a rock & a hard place. What a drag. :(

What have you done? What's been your Post Op date Quest experiences/ any success? I've been widowed for many years. The pickings were slim back when I was pre-op, single b4 I was married. Now here in northeastern OH it's just as lousy if not worse. ROFL! And I can't afford a decent matchmaker. LMBO!🤣

Thanks in advance for helpful recommendations. Much appreciated. :)

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Dating in this day and age is difficult for anyone, especially those that aren't into internet dating.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Been friendszoned my whole damn life :(

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recent Topics

  • Most popular:

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Vicki Lindsey

      Ok I had surgery on Jan 27 2020 so I am 3 weeks out and have lost 32 lbs  I wish I had this done sooner. Now just trying to figure out different things to eat so I am not eating the same thing over and over. I did order some stuff today from the Bariatric Store and that stuff should be here in time for my next phase. I have a goal of 50 lbs by the first of June hope that is attainable. Good luck to every one on this journey 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • GinaFigz

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Arabesque

      So went to my surgeon today for one month follow-up. Last time I was there he wanted me to put on 4kgs but oops I’ve lost another 2kgs. Told him it was intended, was trying to maintain, upped my food intake, was stable for almost 3 weeks but last weekend broke it.
      Mum turned 80. Drinks at neighbours, a couple of crackers & dip, home late, no dinner. Out all morning, followed by celebratory family lunch, home late, no dinner. Whole dietary routine out the window. Did have a protein bar & tuna frittata muffin in between but didn’t eat much at all those two days.
      What dumbfounded me was he was ok with it. I told him I didn’t want to put on his 4kg because of the weight gain many experience in the 12+months in maintenance. He agreed with me. What the??? Invasion of the body snatchers??? Totally opposite position from last month. 
      He was also ok with my stopping my multivitamins. Agreed with my thinking that is better to feel ok & eat then be nauseated & not eat. He’ll just monitor my bloods to ensure no problems which is what they do anyway.
      Not complaining. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • 50Startingover

      How do you fill out the last profile part, the part that says your weight, height.. etc
      · 3 replies
      1. My1smthop

        I'm trying to figure this out as well.

      2. Too many dogs

        Go to profile look for patient in drop down -


      3. Too many dogs

        Under patients my surgery is it

    • MsMocie

      Just came from my GPs office. He would want me upping to 1500kcals a day. Have no idea on how I'm gonna do this - a year ago it would been an issue to come _down_ to 1500 kcals 😂
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Trending Topics

  • Together, we have lost...