We need Fat Moderators

[TakingABreak 2,733]

Just now, jenn1 said:

I'm not sure how @Alex Brecher moderates the site. It has changed many times over the years. I know we can report a post. it's up to the site moderators to decide if its in violation and make a decision on reprimanding or removing a member. Again I can be wrong.

Ahhh I see.

1 hour ago, Creekimp13 said:

There are older people, younger people, people who want to lose weight to uber fitness levels and people who just want to improve their health. There are 200 pound people who want to weight 130....and there are 400 pound people who would love to reach 250. I wish the moderation team represented ALL of these experiences...instead of JUST the smaller people.

We desperately need some balance.

I'm royally confused. So Creek, are you saying that you want people who are at different stages of weight loss to "moderate" the posts to make sure people aren't being too biased? Are you saying that you think current moderators can only see it through "smaller people" lenses? I guess, I've only had one instance where I had to report a post. But, I can see how there is a need for someone to interfere when things get out of hand.

I think having moderators in every room would hinder things. I have benefited from some "tough love", and I'm not talking about the over-the-top, extreme a$$hole version, but from people telling me the thing I really needed to hear. I think it could sensor some of the much needed conversations that are happening.

50 minutes ago, AshAsh1 said:

I agree with @Creekimp13 about how it would be nice to have a greater variety of voices. I like reading stories about people who have come back with a regain after 5+ years. It keeps everything in focus for me. I'm started on the HIGH end of the BMI scale, and I wish there were more people with success stories of reaching goal that are still active. Not to say that there aren't, because I follow each and every one that I find. But there are so many variables: age, height, weight, and gender. I know its silly, but seeing someone close to my stats with success gives me hope.

I will go back to my original statement when I though that a "moderator" was everyone...

I wish we had more diversity.

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

A variety and diversity is great.

Should we have inclusion and exclusion??? *only moderates allowed* *only small people respond* I admit, I'm offended by that thought.

I guess my question is how can you control the population of members that join the site? We will never a perfect balance based on experience, weight lost, sex, race, income status, sexual orientation, relationship status and age. etc

We do have vets, men and women only rooms...Getting more forum categories may help. I'm not sure how @Alex Brecher's team decides on categories.

[TakingABreak 2,733]

8 minutes ago, jenn1 said:

We do have vets, men and women only rooms...Getting more forum categories may help. 300 only room etc??? I'm not sure how @Alex Brecher's team decides on categories.

Do we need a moderates and small people room? Should we have inclusion and exclusion??? *only moderates allowed* *only small people respond* I admit, I'm offended by that thought

On this topic, @Alex Brecher I have embarrassingly posted in a "guys only" room about the topic of swimsuit options, nonetheless. It would be great to see what kind of room it is in from the app.

I could see having a room for weight specific people, 300#, 200#, 100#, ect. It's just the same as Veteran's rooms. The vet's have typically already lost the weight. What's the difference if you wanted to only talk with someone who's close to you in weight. I don't think its offensive, unless people make it offensive. Sometimes I like to reach out to people close to my BMI so I can bounce ideas off them. My BMI was 58.8 when I started, someone that started at 40 couldn't possibly relate as much as someone in my range. I get that we are all on a journey, but some of us have a lot longer paths. Its good to have a variety of inputs for sure, but when you want to, it would be beneficial to have a room to limit the responses to specific people. Same way as the gender specific rooms. Guys want guys only inputs once in awhile.

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

3 hours ago, AshAsh1 said:

On this topic, @Alex Brecher I have embarrassingly posted in a "guys only" room about the topic of swimsuit options, nonetheless. It would be great to see what kind of room it is in from the app.

I could see having a room for weight specific people, 300#, 200#, 100#, ect. It's just the same as Veteran's rooms. The vet's have typically already lost the weight. What's the difference if you wanted to only talk with someone who's close to you in weight. I don't think its offensive, unless people make it offensive. Sometimes I like to reach out to people close to my BMI so I can bounce ideas off them. My BMI was 58.8 when I started, someone that started at 40 couldn't possibly relate as much as someone in my range. I get that we are all on a journey, but some of us have a lot longer paths. Its good to have a variety of inputs for sure, but when you want to, it would be beneficial to have a room to limit the responses to specific people. Same way as the gender specific rooms. Guys want guys only inputs once in awhile.

I like the idea of going back to weight categories... would work right? Ask specific questions that speak to your starting BMI and situation.

Nice to also have the general populations take on things when you want.

*laughing* You may get a few responses like the guys room..lol it happens all the time...It's not on purpose.

[TakingABreak 2,733]

2 minutes ago, jenn1 said:

I like the idea of going back to weight categories... would work right? Ask specific questions that speak to your starting BMI and situation.

You may a few responses like the guys room..lol it happens all the time...It's not on purpose.

I felt insensitive when I posted about women's swimsuits to the guy who was asking about a swim shirt. But it was one of those things that I couldn't tell his gender and I was on the app. I couldn't see what kind of room it was in. But not on purpose and I'm not real sensitive about that kind of stuff. Just felt bad for him.

Edited May 14, 2018 by AshAsh1

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

2 minutes ago, AshAsh1 said:

I felt insensitive when I posted about women's swimsuits to the guy who was asking about a swim shirt. But it was one of those things that I couldn't tell his gender and I was on the app. I couldn't see what kind of room it was in. But not on purpose and I'm not real sensitive about that kind of stuff. Just felt bad for him.

I have done the same over the years. Most guys get that it was our oversight . I apologize and leave...lol

[Orchids&Dragons 9,046]

I kind of like the idea of the weight-range specific rooms. It is nice to be able to talk to people with a similar path. But, then again, I pretty much like talking to everyone Just try to get me to shut up! Couldn't we do pretty much the same thing just by starting different threads? i.e. maintenance, final 20, 20-100, 100-200, etc.?

[Hop_Scotch 1,625]

I gather what is being requested is for more Group Support Leaders? May I ask what the role or expectation of a Group Support Leader is? I have my own thoughts about what they are but in terms of bariaricpal forums I may be wrong.

I volunteer (moderator) on a fairly popular forum. It's hard work and can a lot of time but I gather the role of group support leader would be much harder. It would require a greater time commitment along with the abiiity to be able to engage positively and with empathy with a diverse member base.

[Kate D 41]

I think threads on BMI’s are helpful. I am only 5’0 tall so my pre-op weight is some people’s goal weight. There is a significant difference when someone is 5’11 weighing 275 lbs and say, someone who is 5’0 weighing 275 lbs. just saying I find it’s helpful to look for individuals with similar BMI’s than how much they weigh.

[jess9395 5,448]

One disturbing trend I've noticed recently at this site...is a lack of balanced weight loss experiences in your moderation team.

The bariatric community is diverse.

There are older people, younger people, people who want to lose weight to uber fitness levels and people who just want to improve their health. There are 200 pound people who want to weight 130....and there are 400 pound people who would love to reach 250. I wish the moderation team represented ALL of these experiences...instead of JUST the smaller people.

The VAST MAJORITY of people who have weight loss surgery....statistically are not going to reach goal. Most of us will end up on one side or the other of a 60-70% excess weight loss. It would be nice to see some moderators who understand and continue to live this struggle.

There is little input here from people who have weighed over 350 pounds. I'd like to see a moderator whose journey includes these weight ranges.

It would be nice to see more male voices in moderation, since while they are in the minority...we do have a significant male population.

I'd like to see an older moderator who is sensitive to weight loss after menopause.

Can we please have some moderators who are not JUST women who started in the 200 pound range, in their 30's and 40's...who are now fitness junkies?

We desperately need some balance.

Who are the moderators? How do we identify them? I only know Alex!

BTW I don’t know what camp you put me in, but I lost all my weight well past menopause. Didn’t know if you knew that. I also weighed just under 300 at my highest, though my surgery pre op weight was 271

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

4 hours ago, Creekimp13 said:

Again, I am not criticizing any particular moderator. I'm concerned about a lack of diversity of experiences in our moderation team that creates blind spots.

No one person can be all things or appreciate all perspectives.

You also said" Can we please have some moderators who are not JUST women who started in the 200 pound range, in their 30's and 40's...who are now fitness junkies?

I don't peticulay want any room moderators. I'm an adult I don't need a room moderator to direct and control a subject posted. I'd rather hear all views and opinions. I don't want things supreseed or silenced...The exception is people that violate the rules. but, that seems to be managed by clicking report on violators posts.

I am sleeve patient - Starting BMI 42 "morbidly obese to a healthy BMI. 50 years old, postmenopausal, fitness and nutrition junkie. Is my experience of less value? Could be to you and that's ok.

[jess9395 5,448]

Whaaat? Creek, there's nothing wrong with the moderators, and we mostly self-monitor anyways.

I honestly don’t even know who the moderators are. How do we find them? I’ve been in here for years and have no clue!

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

2 hours ago, Kate D said:

I think threads on BMI’s are helpful. I am only 5’0 tall so my pre-op weight is some people’s goal weight. There is a significant difference when someone is 5’11 weighing 275 lbs and say, someone who is 5’0 weighing 275 lbs. just saying I find it’s helpful to look for individuals with similar BMI’s than how much they weigh.

I think most of us would like to see the category of BMI's to come back to the site. It's great to have the option of similar experiences.

I also like the option that I can get all perspective in the general area.