This is a little off topic. But can I please ask the purpose of the forum? There appears to be a lot of nasty people on it.

I thought the purpose was to help other members. Am I wrong? I see people attacking others who come here to look for help.

I have enough problems getting ready for this surgery. I have been made fun of because of my weight my entire life. It is disgusting to see it happen on a Bariatric Forum where people are supposed to help each other.

I am on many Bariatric forums on FB. None attack members like I see on this forum.

6 minutes ago, Jelly Belly said:

. But can I please ask the purpose of the forum? There appears to be a lot of nasty people on it.

I don't know which threads you read but I participate in more than a dozen key topics and about 15-20 topics that come and go.

In my six months here, I have come upon only THREE nasty contributors who have all been dealt with quickly and appropriately by the site's owner or his IT team.

97% of posts are positive or mostly 'on-track'.

I just wish more people were articulate and careful with the writing, spelling and punctuation they use.

Manners (specifically, bad manners) are minimal IN MY EXPERIENCE.

Maybe @Jelly Belly , you just need to filter the types of threads you're in if you are seeing negativity and nastiness. If anything is untoward and hurts your feelings, tell the correspondent. If she/he does not change, report it.

17 minutes ago, Rainbow_Warrior said:

I don't know which threads you read but I participate in more than a dozen key topics and about 15-20 topics that come and go.

In my six months here, I have come upon only THREE nasty contributors who have all been dealt with quickly and appropriately by the site's owner or his IT team.

97% of posts are positive or mostly 'on-track'.

I just wish more people were articulate and careful with the writing, spelling and punctuation they use.

Manners (specifically, bad manners) are minimal IN MY EXPERIENCE.

Maybe @Jelly Belly , you just need to filter the types of threads you're in if you are seeing negativity and nastiness. If anything is untoward and hurts your feelings, tell the correspondent. If she/he does not change, report it.

Feel free to observe the Got Bad News thread on this section by somebody called 'PeachesCat". This woman (who I recognize from the media) was being attacked by forum members.

You can unfollow that thread or any others you don’t like - in your profile. I agree with @Rainbow_Warrior - the vast majority of people here are trying to help, be supportive. It is easy to get caught up in a bit of a tiff, and I have seen time when someone is misunderstood and it escalates, but it is pretty rare - I reckon it is usually a good idea to move on, for the sake of your sanity...

How is your surgery going - where are you at in this journey we are all on?

While I don't think the response to Peaches was ideal, and was a personal attack (which I feel is inappropriate), I don't feel this thread is appropriate either. To make a general and reductive diagnosis ("crazy people") is just as bad as the posts made about Peaches. Two wrongs don't make a right. Jmo

1 hour ago, FloridaGal1976 said:

While I don't think the response to Peaches was ideal, and was a personal attack (which I feel is inappropriate), I don't feel this thread is appropriate either. To make a general and reductive diagnosis ("crazy people") is just as bad as the posts made about Peaches. Two wrongs don't make a right. Jmo

I do think it is crazy and there is something wrong with a person who feels the need to judge those on a forum who they have never met and don't know. I think a person has serious issues if they would care so much about an individual who they don't know and never met. I also that a person has serious issues if they feel the need to attack a stranger who they don't know, never have met who comes anonymously on a forum in pain asking for help and instead of helping the individual and showing compassion they choose to hurt the individual even more. Kinda like telling somebody who is about to jump off a building to jump. Yes. I do call a person like that crazy and I stand by my statement.

Look at my picture. I am overweight. I have been bullied my whole life. I was accused of being another person of this person because I dared to stand up and say its wrong. That is crazy, and a person who would think so is IMHO. I call it as I see it. A person has serious issues if they feel the need to attack an individual who comes on a forum asking for help, who they don't know and have never met.

While I don't think the response to Peaches was ideal, and was a personal attack (which I feel is inappropriate), I don't feel this thread is appropriate either. To make a general and reductive diagnosis ("crazy people") is just as bad as the posts made about Peaches. Two wrongs don't make a right. Jmo

If my first post on a forum was met with the same harsh assumptions I probably would have posted the same thing about crazy people

SW: 366
CW: 329
GW1: 200
RNY Dec 18, 2017!

11 minutes ago, Real California April said:

If my first post on a forum was met with the same harsh assumptions I probably would have posted the same thing about crazy people

SW: 366
CW: 329
GW1: 200
RNY Dec 18, 2017!

Thank you for getting it. Like I said. I have been bullied my entire life about my weight. I won't let anybody be harassed the same way I was. Especially when we are here to help each other. I don't know her personally. I do know her music and I did see her on tv with Hillary Clinton. She is on FB and I found her there. Friended her and she is posting all about this on her page. You should see the people turning out.
I'm not star struck. She is just another person needing help and was attacked. That isn't cool.

I've been on many forums like this, and no matter what the subject matter, people are people. There's gonna be lots of personalities, just like at school, work, and anywhere else people come together.

I also agree with Rainbow_warrior that sometimes written text can be misconstrued or misunderstood. It's happened to me before. Not talking about Peaches thread, but going forward, try to give people the benefit of the doubt. We judge others by their actions and ourselves by our intentions. I think most people on the forum are really nice and helpful. I haven't had any negative experiences (yet!).

If you feel slighted due to someone's comment on the internet, my suggestion would be to shrug it off the best you can. Redirect your attention-- as others have suggested. You can even block people if you want to. But not worth stewing over. Give it a hair flip!

6 hours ago, sleeved2win said:

If you feel slighted due to someone's comment on the internet, my suggestion would be to shrug it off the best you can. Redirect your attention-- as others have suggested. You can even block people if you want to. But not worth stewing over. Give it a hair flip

Or, if it's really extreme abuse or intolerable profanity, report it to Alec or the BariatricPal IT team.