Hello,
How do you tell your significant other that you plan on getting weight loss surgery?

I had talked to my S.O. about it a year ago and he thought it was not needed, and that all I needed was a different kind of diet and exercise program. We've been together for over 6 years, and he should know how many times I've tried and gained the weight back (plus more). He loses weight fairly easy. I think he sees WLS as extreme and maybe even an easy way out.
Five years ago I had my gallbladder removed, it was a planned surgery and made my life so much better. I wish he would see it like that.

How did you break the news about your plans for weight loss surgery to your loved ones who might be against it?

Edited December 30, 20178 yr by AnnaK1
added info

2 hours ago, VSGnewguy said:

I had my wife pick one up and pointed out that I am carrying around more than 3 of those in extra weight

I know. Bags of juicing oranges in Australia are 3kg (6.7 pounds) and usually contain 15 medium oranges.

In July, I separated 33 bags to one side of the display for my 11 year old grandson ... "That's how much I have to lose, Mitchell ... nearly 500 oranges!"

Started at 174.6kg [nearly 385 pounds] ... future goal is 74.6kg [or 164.5 pounds]. That's 495 seven-ounce oranges to lose!

GOOD NEWS: I am currently 153 oranges lighter already ... in 136 days!

I haven't told anyone I felt wouldn't be supportive. I am now post op and my on-off boyfriend still does not know, my dad does not know and no one in my extended family knows. I told my closest friends(one friend had the gastric balloon and inspired my journey so that was nice.) Other than that only my brothers and my mom know. I have polycystic ovary syndrome and delayed gastric emptying so when my coworkers ask I plan to tell them I am on hormonal pills and I told them I had reproductive surgery(that really gets people to shut up!) I feel it is no one business until I am ready to tell them. What I do plan on telling my dad eventually is, "I made this decision completely by myself because I was unhappy and unhealthy. I mentioned it to you and you were against the idea so I chose not to tell you. I only wanted people who would completely support me to know, but I did always plan on telling you. I'm sorry if my keeping this from you hurts you but ultimately this is my body and my choice and I would love your support now. This was completely about me and I honestly was not interested in letting anyone talk me out of it"

My diabetologist kept suggestion the surgery and gave me the info for the clinic. I went home and told my partner about it. I also told him that I didn't know yet if I'd do it, but I'd make an appointment for a consultation at the clinic.

The night before I left we had a long talk about it, he had a bunch of questions that I could answer already because I hate not being thoroughly informed to know what I need to ask the doctors. He said to me that this is my body and I should do what feels right for me. He loves me for me and will support me either way. I think the thing that made me realize how serious it is was when he said: "I want to grow old with you, any way you need to get there is worth seriously thinking about."

He's been supportive all the way, he reminds me of getting used to new habits like eating slowly, chewing more, not drinking during eating, as a preparation for post-OP but also because it's healthier. He was the very first I told about because this change will be something we both have to be in for. I can't do it without him having my back. Well, I could but it would be a LOT harder.

My parents know and my friends know. I wrote a blog about it, so my readers know too. Grabbing support where ever you can get it, right?

So talk with your husband, if writing a letter is easier for you than vocally talking, do that. Sometimes it's easier to do that, to be able to sort out what is going on in your mind and to structure your arguments. In the end, it is YOUR body. His support would be fantastic. He does want you around for a long time after all, right?

You can do it, keep at it!