Hello Hello!

It has been many months since I last posted here. The last time i posted was concerning me developing a problem with alcohol after the sleeve. Well, that problem has been resolved and I no longer abuse alcohol. I admit it was bad and I was drinking whisky literally as soon as I got up, sneaking it at work, and all through the night. I managed to wean myself off after not quite 2 months. I feel great and my liver feels great too. (Used to get pains in my abdomen after drinking but they are gone.)

So this is what I'm here for now.

For the past 6 months I've been eating crap. I used to be so good on my low-carb diet. Then I started to allow the carbs back in. I was eating everything that I knew I shouldn't. You name it, I ate it. Ice cream, Cookies, cakes, candy, Pasta, mashed potatoes, bread, rice, take-out, I ate it all. As a result I gained 6 lbs. I became horribly depressed and didn't even try to stop from eating this stuff. I simply chose not to weight myself anymore. These past two weeks were the worst. The other day my supper was 2 Hostess orange cupcakes and a pack of Hostess crumb mini donuts. My belief that I was gaining weight was so strong that I convinced myself I could no longer wear the new clothes I bought and was considering buying larger sizes of clothing. I felt so fat. Then one morning I decided to weight myself before showering. Not only did I lose those 6 lbs I gained but I lost an additional 4 lbs on top of that. I'm now at the smallest I've been post surgery and only 10 lbs shy of my goal weight. So should I go back to my low carb diet or should I continue eating crap?

I'm a drug and alcohol counselor. I really hope you understand that even though you've quit drinking, it doesn't mean you're automatically cured of the issues that made you drink in the first place. Now you seem to be transferring your addiction back to food.

You're dealing with your depression in very self destructive ways. I hope you're seeking treatment, a 12 step program or counseling. Without getting to the bottom of the reasons why you continue to abuse alcohol and food, there's a very high chance of relapse, both for drinking and for putting the weight back on.

Good luck to you!

23 hours ago, Greensleevie said:

I'm a drug and alcohol counselor. I really hope you understand that even though you've quit drinking, it doesn't mean you're automatically cured of the issues that made you drink in the first place. Now you seem to be transferring your addiction back to food.

You're dealing with your depression in very self destructive ways. I hope you're seeking treatment, a 12 step program or counseling. Without getting to the bottom of the reasons why you continue to abuse alcohol and food, there's a very high chance of relapse, both for drinking and for putting the weight back on.

Good luck to you!

My addiction to alcohol was only short lived, maybe 5-6 months. I quickly realized I had to get it under control quick and I instinctively knew what I had to do, taper off. So that's what I did. I monitored what I drank over the course of a day. Since I was doing primarily shots of whiskey It was easy to simply reduce my intake by one shot every few days.

I need to stress that although I was "eating crap" that my restriction is still intact from the surgery. So if I messed up and ate donuts then I could only eat 1 and not the dozen that I could eat before surgery. So I would eat a cupcake or what not and that would be my meal.

When I regained 6 lbs it was primarily due to the fact that I was eating every 2-3 hours, and it was usually something sweet or carb-packed. I stopped doing that as well but continued to eat mostly carbs. I think the restriction is what led me to lose those 6 lbs and more.

I'm almost 2 years out and the restriction is still strong. So what I've been eating mostly now is a Protein shake or an egg McMuffin for breakfast, a small Lunchable (the kind with meat, cheese and crackers) for lunch, and either a salad, bit of Pasta, and/or something sweet like a cupcake or two for dinner. So yeah, it's not good but it's nowhere near the abuse I did to my body before surgery.

The theory behind this is the temporary spike in calories and sugar trigger your metabolism to speed up. When you are on strict high protein , low carb diets your body gets used to it and slows down eventually. Every once and a while you need a cheat meal although Im not sure Hostess orange cupcakes are the best option, although delicious.. Try and eat one carb rich meal a week or every 2 weeks and only one meal. And when I mean carb rich, I mean pasta, rice, bread, piza....Real shitty stuff. but it will trigger your body to not go into starvation/deprivation mode.

Ignore any snarky/bitchy responses. What I'm reading here is that you have a lot of emotional issues here. Your used of alcohol was a transference of your addiction to food. Now you are in a really precarious place it seems with your emotions. And, I'm gonna be honest, I feel it's 100% normal. I'm a wreck some days. It's been 5 months since my surgery and sometimes the emotions get worse.

I think therapy is exactly what is needed here. And I'm not just saying that, I'm in the process of trying to find a therapist right now. For me I'm forming an inappropriate crush/attachment at work. I'm becoming fixated on it like I would with food. So rather than f'up my life I'm going into therapy. I didn't become morbidly obese because I had a healthy mind. lol! We are creatures with dents and bruises and sometimes those dents and bruises gather more attention and need and then we need to go take care of them. To me it sounds like you are really struggling and eating only carbs and sabotaging yourself, in your mind, means you are mentally dealing with so much and looking for outlets.

I don't want to just be healthy, I want to be HAPPY. To me, that's actually the most important part of this, besides getting to stay alive.

@Proud2BeMe

Nice to see you posting again! I'm glad you worked out your alcohol issues, we were worried.

I think that those of us that were super morbidly obese and lose to normal or close to normal size really face special issues. Most of the people that post here now are not and have not been super morbidly obese They start in the 200s if that. So their opinions to me don't carry that much weight (ha!)

There are very few people that are in the situation that people like you and I are in. People can't and don't understand. It is a really huge mental trip, and most people will never experience it. I would normally say seek counseling but I am going to be honest, it isn't going to be very useful. Not many of them are going to have experience with what you are going through. You have to really just work through your feelings and emotions in your own way on your own path. I would rather see you abusing carbs than alcohol, but the fact you feel the need to go overboard on anything is an issue.

I think time to adjust to yourself is the best and only realistic solution.

I eat keto/low carb (less than 25G per day) because it keeps me upbeat and my moods balanced. I enjoy it and it is healthy. You should eat in a manner that makes you feel good and is healthy for you. You probably just lost weight because you upped your calories, not the carbs. So just eat more protein.

I'm going to PM you.