Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Denial about my weight



Recommended Posts

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

I know exactly what you mean. I tell everyone I have reverse anorexia. I think I'm less fat than I really am.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Walter.Sobchak I think that finally 'seeing' yourself is a very good first step to doing something about your weight. Next, it's helpful to figure out just what behaviors got you to where you are. My psychologist has been invaluable while I've been on this little journey. Losing the excess weight is the mechanical part, and the sleeve helps a lot with that...but if we don't explore WHY we got to obesity and how to prevent it, the sleeve is just pissing into the wind, you know?

Good luck to you and congratulations for the self-realization :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Walter.Sobchak I think that finally 'seeing' yourself is a very good first step to doing something about your weight. Next, it's helpful to figure out just what behaviors got you to where you are. My psychologist has been invaluable while I've been on this little journey. Losing the excess weight is the mechanical part, and the sleeve helps a lot with that...but if we don't explore WHY we got to obesity and how to prevent it, the sleeve is just pissing into the wind, you know?

Good luck to you and congratulations for the self-realization :)

Yeah, I understand

We have to change the behavior that led us to this point.

It is very challenging.

I used to attend Over-Eaters Anonymous

I have looked into food Addicts Anonymous, but can't find meetings in my area.

I have also researched TOPS, but have never been to one of their meetings.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well I can seriously relate to that.... That's why I'm here! This one picture gave me a reality check out of this world then other events followed of course. But change is here : )

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G928A using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I completely understand how you feel. It seemed like I was seeing the same person in the mirror no matter how much older I got or how much weight I gained. When I saw a pic of myself (which I rarely allowed before), I nearly fell out of my chair. I couldn't believe how I really looked. And even now after I have lost weight, I still see the same person in the mirror. What really helps me is comparing photos from then to now...then I can really see the difference. Good luck with everything!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Photos of myself pre-surgery reduce me to tears every time. Even when I see them now. Breaks my heart. Keeps me in check, now.

Let us know how it goes with the surgeon!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Photos of myself pre-surgery reduce me to tears every time. Even when I see them now. Breaks my heart. Keeps me in check, now.

Let us know how it goes with the surgeon!

Thank you all for the encouraging words.

I am feeling better about taking the steps to see if I can qualify for the sleeve.

Cosmetic reasons aside, I need to get weight off for health reasons.

Surprisingly I am not diabetic or pre-diabetic but if I don't make changes I could end up being diabetic.

I do have several other health issues that need to be addressed though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Walter.Sobchak

I concur with everything everyone has already said, esp. @ShelterDog64.

Like others have said, the person I see in the mirror isn't the same person I see in photos. Those pictures are a rude awakening.

Your health is more important than anything. There's no time like the present to make the lifestyle changes necessary toward being healthier. I had to have the surgery for health reasons, also. Much has improved since that day, but I have to be vigilant and disciplined and stay the course or I will lose ground. The struggle is real.

Wishing the very best to you as you travel along this road.....nothing but success!

I read this article earlier today. It's something to ponder on; I know I will be.

http://www.bariatricpal.com/page/articles.html/_/support/weight-loss-surgery-is-not-the-solution-r651

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I refused to be in pictures for the last few years but had a similar moment when I saw myself in a full sized mirror at the dog groomers. I think a lot of us are in some denial and at some point something just snaps you out of it. even when i saw the occasional photo of myself id think, "oh it's just a bad angle".

realizing there's a problem is always an important step in getting better. good luck at your WLS appt. you're on your way now!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I also saw a photo that gave me that OMG moment. Every time I tried to talk myself out of going ahead with the surgery, I just looked at that photo to remind myself that was what I was going to remain if I didn't do something about it. It helped me move forward.

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I also saw a photo that gave me that OMG moment. Every time I tried to talk myself out of going ahead with the surgery, I just looked at that photo to remind myself that was what I was going to remain if I didn't do something about it. It helped me move forward.

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

That is a good idea.

I might try that myself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

I wish you luck. I think that we all think we are smaller than we are. Until we get small and then we think we are bigger than we are! Ha ha. I told my family I still think of myself as fat and would like to lose another 25-30 lbs. in unison all said "FROM WHERE!?" My defining moment was when my husband accidentally snapped a pic of my backside (pre surgery) at my daughters bday party. I didn't believe it was me but knew that it was because of the clothing. (You can see said photo in a few of my posts). I was absolutely DISGUSTED with myself. I knew something had to change. I can't wait to follow your journey.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Edited by gustavio

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

I wish you luck. I think that we all think we are smaller than we are. Until we get small and then we think we are bigger than we are! Ha ha. I told my family I still think of myself as fat and would like to lose another 25-30 lbs. in unison all said "FROM WHERE!?" My defining moment was when my husband accidentally snapped a pic of my backside (pre surgery) at my daughters bday party. I didn't believe it was me but knew that it was because of the clothing. (You can see said photo in a few of my posts). I was absolutely DISGUSTED with myself. I knew something had to change. I can't wait to follow your journey.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Yeah, I understand.

I am scared and nervous.

I keep going back and forth.

One minute I am all gung ho about surgery, and the next minute I am convincing myself that I can do it without surgery.

Part of me is too proud to admit that I can't do it on my own.

I am too proud to admit that I have to get 80% of my stomach cut out to lose weight.

However, I know I have to do something as I am miserable at my current weight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was very hesitant. I was NOT excited when I was approved and NOT excited when I got my surgery date. I am a worry wart and was convinced it wasn't the right thing to do. After much thought and research I felt it was my only option. I had to save my life for the sake of my children. I have never looked back. I have never regretted it not even for a split second. I feel so very blessed to have been able to do this. Nothing good ever just happens to me. I am a pessimist by nature. aside from my husband and children, this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Nobody can say "do it" and you listen. You have to find that within. At your starting weight, it is going to be difficult to get to a healthy weight. Why not use a tool given to us by these brilliant surgeons. If you still have reservations, talk to your doc about his experience and success stories.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×