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Denial about my weight

  • Popular Post

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

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Featured Replies

  • Popular Post

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

I know exactly what you mean. I tell everyone I have reverse anorexia. I think I'm less fat than I really am.

  • Popular Post

@@Walter.Sobchak I think that finally 'seeing' yourself is a very good first step to doing something about your weight. Next, it's helpful to figure out just what behaviors got you to where you are. My psychologist has been invaluable while I've been on this little journey. Losing the excess weight is the mechanical part, and the sleeve helps a lot with that...but if we don't explore WHY we got to obesity and how to prevent it, the sleeve is just pissing into the wind, you know?

Good luck to you and congratulations for the self-realization :)

  • Author

@@Walter.Sobchak I think that finally 'seeing' yourself is a very good first step to doing something about your weight. Next, it's helpful to figure out just what behaviors got you to where you are. My psychologist has been invaluable while I've been on this little journey. Losing the excess weight is the mechanical part, and the sleeve helps a lot with that...but if we don't explore WHY we got to obesity and how to prevent it, the sleeve is just pissing into the wind, you know?

Good luck to you and congratulations for the self-realization :)

Yeah, I understand

We have to change the behavior that led us to this point.

It is very challenging.

I used to attend Over-Eaters Anonymous

I have looked into food Addicts Anonymous, but can't find meetings in my area.

I have also researched TOPS, but have never been to one of their meetings.

Well I can seriously relate to that.... That's why I'm here! This one picture gave me a reality check out of this world then other events followed of course. But change is here : )

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G928A using the BariatricPal App

I completely understand how you feel. It seemed like I was seeing the same person in the mirror no matter how much older I got or how much weight I gained. When I saw a pic of myself (which I rarely allowed before), I nearly fell out of my chair. I couldn't believe how I really looked. And even now after I have lost weight, I still see the same person in the mirror. What really helps me is comparing photos from then to now...then I can really see the difference. Good luck with everything!

Photos of myself pre-surgery reduce me to tears every time. Even when I see them now. Breaks my heart. Keeps me in check, now.

Let us know how it goes with the surgeon!

  • Author

Photos of myself pre-surgery reduce me to tears every time. Even when I see them now. Breaks my heart. Keeps me in check, now.

Let us know how it goes with the surgeon!

Thank you all for the encouraging words.

I am feeling better about taking the steps to see if I can qualify for the sleeve.

Cosmetic reasons aside, I need to get weight off for health reasons.

Surprisingly I am not diabetic or pre-diabetic but if I don't make changes I could end up being diabetic.

I do have several other health issues that need to be addressed though.

@@Walter.Sobchak

I concur with everything everyone has already said, esp. @ShelterDog64.

Like others have said, the person I see in the mirror isn't the same person I see in photos. Those pictures are a rude awakening.

Your health is more important than anything. There's no time like the present to make the lifestyle changes necessary toward being healthier. I had to have the surgery for health reasons, also. Much has improved since that day, but I have to be vigilant and disciplined and stay the course or I will lose ground. The struggle is real.

Wishing the very best to you as you travel along this road.....nothing but success!

I read this article earlier today. It's something to ponder on; I know I will be.

http://www.bariatricpal.com/page/articles.html/_/support/weight-loss-surgery-is-not-the-solution-r651

I refused to be in pictures for the last few years but had a similar moment when I saw myself in a full sized mirror at the dog groomers. I think a lot of us are in some denial and at some point something just snaps you out of it. even when i saw the occasional photo of myself id think, "oh it's just a bad angle".

realizing there's a problem is always an important step in getting better. good luck at your WLS appt. you're on your way now!

I also saw a photo that gave me that OMG moment. Every time I tried to talk myself out of going ahead with the surgery, I just looked at that photo to remind myself that was what I was going to remain if I didn't do something about it. It helped me move forward.

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

  • Author

I also saw a photo that gave me that OMG moment. Every time I tried to talk myself out of going ahead with the surgery, I just looked at that photo to remind myself that was what I was going to remain if I didn't do something about it. It helped me move forward.

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

That is a good idea.

I might try that myself.

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

I wish you luck. I think that we all think we are smaller than we are. Until we get small and then we think we are bigger than we are! Ha ha. I told my family I still think of myself as fat and would like to lose another 25-30 lbs. in unison all said "FROM WHERE!?" My defining moment was when my husband accidentally snapped a pic of my backside (pre surgery) at my daughters bday party. I didn't believe it was me but knew that it was because of the clothing. (You can see said photo in a few of my posts). I was absolutely DISGUSTED with myself. I knew something had to change. I can't wait to follow your journey.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Edited by gustavio

  • Author

Hello All,

I had a realization the other day, I am in denial about my size.

I do not see myself the same way the world sees me.

I saw a picture of myself and it was shocking, I am huge.

In my head I don't look that bad.

I have always been a big guy.

In college I was big and muscular and that is how I still see myself.

However, now I am big and soft and obese but I don't see myself that way.

I have to get honest with myself.

I am 420 pounds, I am wearing a 6XLT shirt, waist size 54 pants.

I am 200 pounds heavier than I was at 21 years old.

I have my appointment with the weight loss surgeon in less than a week.

I have received some encouraging responses on this forum, so I thank all of you for that.

I wish you luck. I think that we all think we are smaller than we are. Until we get small and then we think we are bigger than we are! Ha ha. I told my family I still think of myself as fat and would like to lose another 25-30 lbs. in unison all said "FROM WHERE!?" My defining moment was when my husband accidentally snapped a pic of my backside (pre surgery) at my daughters bday party. I didn't believe it was me but knew that it was because of the clothing. (You can see said photo in a few of my posts). I was absolutely DISGUSTED with myself. I knew something had to change. I can't wait to follow your journey.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Yeah, I understand.

I am scared and nervous.

I keep going back and forth.

One minute I am all gung ho about surgery, and the next minute I am convincing myself that I can do it without surgery.

Part of me is too proud to admit that I can't do it on my own.

I am too proud to admit that I have to get 80% of my stomach cut out to lose weight.

However, I know I have to do something as I am miserable at my current weight.

I was very hesitant. I was NOT excited when I was approved and NOT excited when I got my surgery date. I am a worry wart and was convinced it wasn't the right thing to do. After much thought and research I felt it was my only option. I had to save my life for the sake of my children. I have never looked back. I have never regretted it not even for a split second. I feel so very blessed to have been able to do this. Nothing good ever just happens to me. I am a pessimist by nature. aside from my husband and children, this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Nobody can say "do it" and you listen. You have to find that within. At your starting weight, it is going to be difficult to get to a healthy weight. Why not use a tool given to us by these brilliant surgeons. If you still have reservations, talk to your doc about his experience and success stories.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

  • Author

I was very hesitant. I was NOT excited when I was approved and NOT excited when I got my surgery date. I am a worry wart and was convinced it wasn't the right thing to do. After much thought and research I felt it was my only option. I had to save my life for the sake of my children. I have never looked back. I have never regretted it not even for a split second. I feel so very blessed to have been able to do this. Nothing good ever just happens to me. I am a pessimist by nature. aside from my husband and children, this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Nobody can say "do it" and you listen. You have to find that within. At your starting weight, it is going to be difficult to get to a healthy weight. Why not use a tool given to us by these brilliant surgeons. If you still have reservations, talk to your doc about his experience and success stories.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

How long ago did you get the surgery?

How much weight did you lose?

I agree with you, losing the weight without surgery is going to be very difficult and then keeping it off is another challenge all together.

I have my appointment on Tuesday of next week.

My insurance has a 6 month waiting period, so I will have time to do more research.

I have two female cousins that both got it done and they have been encouraging me to do it.

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