Failing at Friendship....

[sarahb309 69]

I feel like I have no friends and am having trouble making friends... my best friend has become toxic and is moving away... I feel like I only maintained that relationship because I was scared of being alone... and now I actually will be... in 20y/o and a sophomore in college. I fell like people passed judgment on my size last year and that's why I had no one, but I don't know what to do anymore... I don't want to be friends with people who only like me b/c I lost weight, but I am scared to be alone.... I don't mean to rant... but I'm upset and nervous and scared... anyone on this site ever have a similar experience and tips?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

[chamomilelavender 19]

Hey, I've totally been there before and I empathize. Change is scary especially when you're doing it alone. I'll be your friend!

[Ldyvenus 317]

I would rather have a handful of genuine friends than a hoard of acquaintances. As I get older, I find it difficult to meet decent people who have similar interests. I'm also an introvert who prefers a good book and a nap over going out for drinks in the middle of the afternoon.

Just give it time and find ways to get yourself out there.

[Samburger 10]

On 12/29/2016 at 2:27 PM, sarahb309 said:

I feel like I have no friends and am having trouble making friends... my best friend has become toxic and is moving away... I feel like I only maintained that relationship because I was scared of being alone... and now I actually will be... in 20y/o and a sophomore in college. I fell like people passed judgment on my size last year and that's why I had no one, but I don't know what to do anymore... I don't want to be friends with people who only like me b/c I lost weight, but I am scared to be alone.... I don't mean to rant... but I'm upset and nervous and scared... anyone on this site ever have a similar experience and tips?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Hey Sweetie. I totally understand how you feel. I unfortunately had a lot of mental health issues after losing weight due to feeling like people (especially dudes) were only nice to me because I looked good... it sent me into depression and I started using drugs. Lost all my friends in the process...

Your feelings are very valid, but, as hard as it may be, you have to let that go, love. People are superficial, there is no other way around it, and you can’t really change that. But you need a social/support network to thrive! Especially in college! There are plenty of awesome people out there that would like you no matter what you look like. Just be confident and put yourself out there. Or, do like I did, and PRETEND you are confident. Fake it til ya make it, and eventually you will actually become confident for real.

Talk to your classmates, join a club, participate in school events and activities. You’re bound to meet a person or two or three that you vibe with. You may not be able to relate to them about a few things, but that’s what we’re here for right?

I should probably take my own advice 😜 But anyway, let me know if you ever want to talk, vent, or need anything at all friend!