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Should I postpone my surgery?

NJ Mom

By NJ Mom, in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums

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NJ Mom    30

NJ Mom
Posted (edited)

Hi everyone

Looking for thoughts and guidance, feeling so confused. I am scheduled for surgery next week on the 9th. Just found out today my 14 year old son tore his ACL in football and will most likely need surgery. I'm thinking I should postpone my surgery so I can be available to care for him, prob multiple dr visits and then his surgery. I'm wondering how quickly I will be back in commission to get around and do what I need to do as a mom. Feeling selfish to have the surgery when he is needing my help, but afraid that if I don't do it now I might never. Thanks for any thoughts, so sick about this, terrible timing

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Edited by NJ Mom

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sc101071    398

sc101071
Posted

You won't be carrying him. 14 yo on crutches. He'll be fine. So y'all uber if you have an appt the first week.

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NJ Mom    30

NJ Mom
Posted

My husband, but I guess I'm so used to being the one to handle these things with doctors, etc. hard for me to not be involved. Plus it's difficult for him to get time off

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Babbs    14,681

Babbs
Posted

When is his surgery? It's not like you're going to be out of commission for weeks. Most people are up and about and even some back to work a week later. They encourage you to move and walk as much as you can, anyway. Lifting restrictions would really be the only concern. Obviously if his surgery is pretty much at the same time as yours it may be a issue if their isn't someone else around to help out.

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HalFAB-ulous!    36

HalFAB-ulous!
Posted

I was back at work post op 8. Could have gone back post op 6.

Everyone's journey is different.

Don't postpone. Part of taking care of kids is showing them how to take care of yourself.

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dlp712    11

dlp712
Posted

I would go ahead with sleeve surgery. You're not down that long. You can drive in 24 hrs. It will work out with your son. GO FOR IT !!!! Good Luck

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Ki.B    10

Ki.B
Posted

As a mom i totally get this... were by nature to be selfless and not selfish .... But if you dont take care of you... You wont be any use to anyone else. You have a husband and thats a blessing! Go get your surgery!

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NJ Mom    30

NJ Mom
Posted

Just want to say a sincere thank you to all of you that took the time to respond to my dilemma. I'm just sick about it, as you all know the mental build up to have this surgery is huge, and this issue with my son has put me all out of sorts. I think I just don't want any distractions during my recuperation, I wanted this to be all about ME for once, but life happens and I will figure it out. My husband, who really didn't want me to have this surgery, is saying "its up to you"...that is not really what I wanted to hear, I wanted to hear, yes have it next week! We will work it out! I should get the results to the MRI for my son today or tomorrow and then can hopefully figure out the time schedule for both of us. Everyone is telling me to get a second opinion regardless for him, and to take him to NYC or Philly where we can get the best doctor. This all sounds time consuming to me, which is freaking me out. Sorry again for rambling, and thank you all so much, really what an amazingly supportive group!

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heidikat72    935

heidikat72
Posted

I would go ahead and have your surgery. The only real issue I see is if there are doctor appts the first few days after your surgery - if you are still on any pain meds when you leave the hospital, you shouldn't drive until you've been off the narcotics for 48 hrs. But as someone else already said - you can always uber to your son's appointments or ask a family member or friend to help out with transport.

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silverthreads    183

silverthreads
Posted

Your son is going to have a lot of questions about what surgery is like, what's anesthesia, etc. If you go forward with your surgery you can set a good example for him and he'll know you've been down a similar road. I think that's a very good thing. Besides--I suspect the ACL surgery will be down the road a bit.

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NJ Mom    30

NJ Mom
Posted

Thanks everyone. Found out my son will need a couple of weeks of therapy before he has the surgery so I'm going to go ahead with my surgery on Wed . His injury just took my head out of my surgery for a bit, but I know I need to do this NOW.

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Anna Nim    196

Anna Nim
Posted

ACL is not that bad, done it twice. Nice to have bell, like someone to make you meals for the first few days and keep items out of your path. That is it. Don't postpone.

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NJ Mom    30

NJ Mom
Posted

ACL is not that bad, done it twice. Nice to have bell, like someone to make you meals for the first few days and keep items out of your path. That is it. Don't postpone.

Sent from my XT1254 using the BariatricPal App

How was your recuperation from the ACL surgery?

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums

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    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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