This is my first post here and I can only apologise for it being a bit of a weird one...

I am in for VSG on Tuesday (20th) and have been heavily indulging myself in the pre and post op photos to try and distract my brain with positivity rather than the current morbid fear that it will be the last time I wave my kids off to school (ridiculous I know)

Thing is, I am seeing lots of people on my start weight who are tiny...like, really wee. I haven't been under 15 some in as many years (37 now) and haven't seen myself below 12 stone since i was 18.

Does the speed of physical change come as a shock? Is it hard to accept? most importantly...do you still feel yourself, or do you have to learn to be a new you???

I hope this makes some sense.

I am still pre-op, but I have had rapid and dramatic weight loss in the past and I went through a period of time where I didn't recognize myself. I have never been "normal" size, and at my smallest, when I looked in a mirror, for a brief moment my brain would freak out because that couldn't be me looking back at me! I have no idea what it will be like getting down to goal weight. So I am right there with you, we can go bonkers together!

I had RNY gastric bypass surgery and the weight fell off fairly rapidly. I transitioned from the Weight Loss phase into the Maintenance phase at around 7 months. Sleeve patients lose weight at a slower pace but they lose weight over a longer period of time, sometimes 2 years, and can achieve almost the same weight loss as RNY patients. Even though I lost weight rapidly, it was not a shock. Some people no longer recognized me.

It is good to take a good before photograph so that you have something to compare it with after surgery. Many people do not see how obese they really are. I never appeared in photographs because I was the photographer in the family. When I looked in a mirror, it was alway straight on. The problem is that many people do not see how obese they really are and after surgery do not see how much weight they really lost.

So in my case I took a before photo and a 6 month after photo. I tried to strike the same pose so it was a good one to one comparison. Here is the photo.

I have lost over 100 pounds since my surgery on 9 December 2015 and am now stable at 134-136 lbs. It's still a shock to see myself in the mirror sometimes, and often I don't recognise myself. Clothes shopping is a surreal experience...it can be so hard to purchase things online because though I wear a size US 6 or S/M, I tend to purchase things in larger sizes than I need to because I am so used to being big. Seeing them in a store and actually trying them on helps me quite a bit.

There are still times when I ask my husband over and over if something makes me look too large/fat/etc which sometimes drives him crazy because I'm not overweight anymore at all. He totally understands where the insecurity comes from because he knows that there is still a disconnect between what I see in my mind and what I actually look like, and he always reassures me...but I can't wait for my brain and body to sync up!