Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

stress and WLS or in other words when bad things happen



Recommended Posts

I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your father. Three years ago I lost my boyfriend and father within 4 months of each other. Undeniably the worst period of my life. All I can offer you is let yourself grieve and also allow yourself to still experience joy without guilt. That last one was hard for me, for a long time I felt horribly guilty if I had a good day. Also, don't expect to go back to your "normal" state before the loss of your dad. You will never "get over it" - it used to make me so mad when someone would say 'it's been x amount of time, you should be over it already". What will happen is you will figure out how to go on and define your new "normal".

Many hugs to you. Take care of yourself and be kind to yourself during this time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am sorry for your loss. Please take gentle care of yourself.

JustWatchMe

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Christinamo7

I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is very difficult and even more so when it is so sudden.

Having lost my mother way too soon, the only advice I can give you is to be good to yourself. Take the time you need to truly grieve.

The loss never goes away but it does get easier to deal with as time passes.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Hugs.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am so sorry to read about the loss of your father. I know there are no words that can ease your heartbreak and I can't imagine what you are going through.

Hugs and healing to you and your family.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Christianmo7 I too am so sorry for your loss. I lost my Dad last spring after a long illness. While it was expected it still left a hole in my heart. I can't imagine the shock of losing someone you love so suddenly.

Your feelings of not wanting to do anything are perfectly normal and only human. Don't fret over natural feelings. As others have said so well take it one day at a time. Find strength by knowing your father loved you and was proud of you. He'd want you to be strong and stay the path.

We all find ways to deal with our loss. I threw myself into my work--perhaps not the healthiest response but on reflection its exactly what Dad would have done. I've also spent a lot of time visiting Mom and trying to help her in any way I can.

Notice too all the love around you--your many friends on this board is only the tip of the iceberg I'm sure.

We all feel powerless to help in times like these. Just know that we're all here in your corner, ready to help you in any way we can.

Many hugs...

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am very sorry for your loss.

You might expect to be a bit numb for a while.... Do your best to have a few healthy options around..... Try to walk or do anything you like just to move a bit...

Just know you will feel this deeply and ..... Since one of our coping mechanism is not there( overeating, mindlessly snacking, etc) you might find it coming in big waves of emotion.

Hoping you can catch your breath inbetween.

We are here to listen.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

thank you everyone. I am sorry for everyone of you who has also experienced such a traumatic loss - but to know you are all still going on is, well. it's good to know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am so sorry to hear about your dad's passing. He would want you to be focused on moving forward while preserving your precious memories of your time with him. You can only take small steps as your progress through your grief.....choose each step carefully and wisely. I am an only child helping my mom move from AL to IL to be near us. This is very hard too, and I have been struggling with food for the last two weeks here.....but I know I have to make smart choices for myself to be here for my mom. And I've done pretty well on the eating and exercise each day. Keep posting if you feel like you to release some stress. We are here for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So sorry for your loss.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Christinamo7 - Very sorry for your loss. A lot of major losses and stresses have been the reason why many of us became emotional eaters in the first place.

@@VSGAnn2014 - Wow...that is the perfect list for the OP and for all of us.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Christinamo7

So very sorry for your loss. I hope you have loving and caring people around you, and that you find the strength to look after yourself.

My Dad has been ill for a long time now, and he lives far away from me.

I am really worried about him, and worry when I don't hear from him. I myself have been too sick to travel, and life is tough at the moment.

I can only imagine how a sudden death of a parent could feel. Please accept my condolences.

I have had financial stress and stress from my ongoing auto-immune disease issues.

For me, if I get too stressed, it kills my appetite, and I forget to eat.

I try to force myself to have Proteins and stay hydrated.

Lots of great advice and support have been given here.

All my best wishes to you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm very sorry for you loss of your Dad. Please be kind to yourself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry for your loss - keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. This has a physical impact on your body as well as an emotional one so treat yourself gently similarly to when you were recovering from surgery.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There are just no words that can help, but I'm so sorry to read what you are going through. Please continue to take care of yourself and your family and I will pray for strength & comfort to you all.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Christinamo7 thinking of you and your family and sending you lots of prayers. I imagine the shock is wearing off so please continue to surround yourself with loved ones and support.

I lost my brother 6 months after WLS and while you know eventually you will get a chance to test your new skills with a crisis, never thought it would be so soon. I am sad you are finding this out yourself, but from all the posts I've read from you and been inspired by, I know you will continue to thrive even though your loss is so huge and unexpected.

Thanks for keeping us updated.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×