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No more alimony



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The OP sounds great, and then the last sentence is about revenge. Kind of negates the whole 'nice guy' thing, don't you think?

Kind of like going on and on about how pious and holy someone is and ending with, "and he has the best recipe for grilled babies."

"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

Edited by Fredbear

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and, if you need a safe place to vent your spleen, feel free to message me - It's probably nothing I didn't say at the time this happened in my life either.

Thank you, but I seem to have given an incorrect impression. I haven't had the experience. Reading your earlier message about a history I didn't know you had got me livid on your behalf and on the side of decency overall. I thought he should be run through with a bayonet, but have calmed down since. That you have long since made a happy life is balm.

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The OP sounds great, and then the last sentence is about revenge. Kind of negates the whole 'nice guy' thing, don't you think?

Kind of like going on and on about how pious and holy someone is and ending with, "and he has the best recipe for grilled babies."

"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

You are kind of missing the irony in the statement on "revenge." When you read the Count of Monte Cristo, and his elaborate plot of revenge and even when it succeeded, it did not satisfy him. What my attorney said in essence was "don't worry about striking back. Don't worry about revenging past wrongs, live a good, fun, and wonderful life. The Karma takes care of itself." I think that is great advise.

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Thank you, but I seem to have given an incorrect impression. I haven't had the experience. Reading your earlier message about a history I didn't know you had got me livid on your behalf and on the side of decency overall. I thought he should be run through with a bayonet, but have calmed down since. That you have long since made a happy life is balm.

and, if you need a safe place to vent your spleen, feel free to message me - It's probably nothing I didn't say at the time this happened in my life either.

oh yes, I misunderstood! thank you for that kindness that you would care so. life evens things out in the end.... I am happy and very well loved. and apologies to @@OKCPirate for talking so much about *me* on this topic about his news.

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@@Christinamo7 - no appologies needed, it is a great juxtaposition example.

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That is great advice. Where did you squirrel away a decent lawyer? Those are like... shockingly rare ;-)

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That is great advice. Where did you squirrel away a decent lawyer? Those are like... shockingly rare ;-)

His parents divorced and did it the wrong way. When his daughter was born they had negotiate visitation times so the parents were not in the same room at the same time. He was nice enough to share the story to remind me not to make that mistake. I don't want to put my kids in that situation so I bite my tongue and remember the goal.

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Friend of mine just finished her last alimony payment (5 years' worth) to her husband. She is so glad that's over. It really is the final end to the marriage, she says.

P.S. I had to pay my first husband alimony, too. I know what she means.

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My ex-husband and his girlfriend took me along to Disney World and paid for my trip. We have the best family. They rented a house and I had my own room. We also had our two kids, three grandkids and Peggy's three kids. Everyone got along. Eleven of us in our matching 2015 Family Vacation T-shirts. My friends said, Wait, you are going to spend a week with your ex and his girlfriend???? Yep. He paid for me because he said he was trying to make amends for being an ass when we were married. Yep, I'll take it. We are all going on a cruise together in July 2017. You are a good guy, Pirate. You won't have any reason to spend your vacations with your ex-wife.

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My ex-husband and his girlfriend took me along to Disney World and paid for my trip. We have the best family. They rented a house and I had my own room. We also had our two kids, three grandkids and Peggy's three kids. Everyone got along. Eleven of us in our matching 2015 Family Vacation T-shirts. My friends said, Wait, you are going to spend a week with your ex and his girlfriend???? Yep. He paid for me because he said he was trying to make amends for being an ass when we were married. Yep, I'll take it. We are all going on a cruise together in July 2017. You are a good guy, Pirate. You won't have any reason to spend your vacations with your ex-wife.

I have a great deal of respect for your ex making that effort and for you for taking him up on the offer.

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You, sir, are a class act.

Good guy.

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I've never wanted to be divorced and after 37 years of marriage, I don't think I will be but.... if it ever happens I hope I can do it as gracefully and Adult-like as y'all have. How we treat others says so much about us. It's nice to be in the company of such awesome people.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

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