Imagine this. You and your doctor agree that you need to lose weight. You tell your doctor you’ve been thinking about weight loss surgery. Your doctor lets you know his or her thoughts about WLS, and they’re very negative.

You may not need to imagine it because it may have happened – or be happening – to you. What should your next step be when your own doctor is not supportive of WLS?

Doctor’s Orders: Lose the Weight

Almost all Weight Loss Surgery patients and nearly everyone who’s considering getting WLS had a similar experience to the following. You go for a routine visit to your primary care physician, endocrinologist, or regular doctor, and you get the news you’ve come to expect: you’ve gained a little weight since the last appointment and you’re developing obesity-related problems. Bottom line, your doctor says, is that you need to lose weight.

It’s no secret that you need to lose weight. You’ve probably tried a thousand different diets. They may have worked, but only for a time. Then any weight that left came right back, with a few extra pounds. You recently started thinking about weight loss surgery, and you bring up that idea to your doctor.

“Weight Loss Surgery Is the Wrong Choice”

Some doctors are against weight loss surgery. They have the same reasons as anyone else who may be against weight loss surgery. They say it’s the easy way out, or you can lose weight on your own, or you might have complications. It’s great for them to express their concerns to you since that’s their job. But it’s not okay to deny you the opportunity to lose weight just because they don’t like the idea of WLS and may not have ever done any research into it.

The Ideal

Doctors are supposed to be compassionate, understanding, and competent. If that sounds like a tall order, it is. But it’s not unrealistic. You need to feel comfortable discussing your health and health decisions with your doctor without your doctor making you feel like a failure for not losing weight already and for considering Weight Loss Surgery.

You Come First

Your doctor should put you first. Putting you first means taking into consideration your future health, your dieting and weight history, and your own beliefs about whether weight loss surgery is right for you. Your doctor should put you ahead of any personal beliefs or biases about weight loss surgery, or lack of knowledge about it.

Seeking a “Second Opinion”

You’re always entitled to a second opinion when it comes to your health and healthcare decisions. You may not need an official “second opinion” on whether you should get WLS if you’ve already decided you’re going for it. What you do need is an opinion from a doctor who will support you.

You can consider switching your primary care doctor if it’s important to you that your PCP be supportive of your WLS journey and during it. You may even want to find a doctor with some understanding of WLS and how to help you prepare for and recover from it. That’s not always possible, for insurance and logistical reasons. It may not be desirable if you like your PCP otherwise and don’t want to jump ship.

A Supportive Bariatric Surgeon

Whether or not your family doctor approves of Weight Loss Surgery, your surgeon absolutely needs to be on your side. While you can expect bariatric surgeons to be supportive of you getting WLS, that’s not the only thing to consider. Consider whether the surgeon makes you feel confident you’ll get the support you need and that you will succeed.

Whether because of their poor bedside manners or lack of attention to detail, some surgeons will keep you in doubt about your decision. Those are not the right surgeons for you! You may need to have initial consults with one, two, three, or even more surgeons before settling on the one that’s going to boost you up.

A Personal Decision

Ultimately, weight loss surgery is your decision. You can decide to get it, or not to get it. It should be a decision based on what you think will help you lose weight, how much risk you’re willing to take by going “under the knife” (although it’s laparoscopic these days!), and how you think it stacks up against your other options.

It should NOT be a decision based on what your doctor thinks or how uncomfortable you feel talking to your doctor or surgeon about it. It’s up to you.

its rare enough to even get your PCP to mention your weight !!! I am thankful my PCP was fully supportive and so was my GYN. It is worth forming a team who have your best interests at heart.

Don't be afraid to tell your doctor when he/she has overstepped a boundary or has struck a personal chord of some kind. They often have little to no clue about anything in life in which they haven't been intensively trained in books and classes and can use a reality check. If your surgeon is a skinny person that hasn't battled weight, this goes on yet another front. Just like a thin friend who has no clue why you would want to do this and who says just being more careful is the way to go, don't let the diploma on the wall and the thousands of bogus societies of which they are members scare you out of speaking your mind and representing yourself well. If you think it is between your dignity and actually getting approved, then the answer is simple...keep searching.

I had heard so many horror stories of PCPs being negative about WLS or not wanting to write a referral to start the process. I worried my doctor would be negative and delayed asking for several months. She ended up being wonderful- totally supportive and acknowledged that it would be a great thing for my health.

I found it very helpful that my (former) PCP made such a ridiculous remark about my decision to seek the sleeve. She wanted me to try buying better cookbooks first. After a lifetime of obesity, weight watchers, nutrisystems and every fad diet out there - you don't think I already own a bookshelf full of healthy cookbooks? At that moment, her simplistic view of decades long fight toward better health made me realize I was DONE... and i never looked back!

I'm not looking forward to asking my PCP for a letter. He has already stated the band was a fad and now the sleeve. I had band removed in December and have maintained 100 pound weight loss. Need to lose another 100 so trying sleeve. This was when dr imparted his view. Hoping he approves me will know next week. If not I will seek another dr.

I'm so grateful for my GP. It was her idea to refer me to our bariatric clinic a couple of years ago. I saw her a week after surgery for a check up and drop some meds. She was so happy for me she was Teary eyed. Said that this would change things for me health wise so dramatically. And it has already. No more high BP pills, no more migraines and my resting heart rate is 30 beats slower per minute.! I'll be forever grateful to her for encouraging me to go this route.

This article/post couldn't have come at a better time - I've been procrastinating about getting the required letter from my PCP. I actually have NO idea whatsoever what she thinks of WLS; I just fear she'll have the negative reactions a lot of people have. She has told me to lose weight several times. I am fortunate in that I am a patient in the University of Pennsylvania health system, so I know there are many other options to go to if she turns out to be unsupportive...but knowing that intellectually isn't the same as the emotional fears that pop up.

I was fortunate, it was my PCP who recommended I consider having WLS. And has been super supportive since. It took me a year to wrap my brain around the option and to research everything I could. Once I made the decision, and had the first appointment with the surgeon, I didn't look back. Even though years before another PCP's PA with whom I had my appts. had suggested it "lightly," I always thought I should be able to lose this weight with the surgery; I'd done it many times before. But, life changes things, the body changes, and no matter all the efforts made to lose even 50 lbs., I was not successful. WLS certainly IS NOT the easy way out no matter what others may think. It still takes a lot of work, but having the restriction of my sleeved tummy certainly helps. No regrets!!

8 years ago, I went to a clinic with a knee injury - and saw a doctor I'd never seen before--He knew nothing about me or my medical history.

Within the first 5 minutes of my visit, he blurted out, "Have you considered having the Lap-Band?"---and I was hurt, appalled, bewildered...stunned speechless that someone who knew NOTHING about me would have the audacity to broach such a personal topic...without ever having seen me before.

Long story short, I made the decision to have WLS on MY terms...cooperatively and with the full support of my primary care provider.

We all have our story to tell...and it amazes me how the stigma of obesity is so pervasive, with ignorance, cruelty and unprofessional incidents being more and more common than one would care to believe.

Every doctor I have (and I have a lot that see me on a regular basis) is on board with my WLS and excited for me!! I don't think I needed a referral. I just called and attended a seminar and the ball got rolling. Unless they got something from my PCP later, I don't know.

I've always had an issue with my weight, but since I stopped smoking in 2000 I gained about 10lbs and then I got sick and gained more weight. Since then my medical condition has not improved and with the meds I have to take and the lack of mobility, I have steadily gained and gained to now being in the morbidly obese category and 120lbs over my ideal weight.

Through all this no one has mentioned my weight! My PCP would laugh at me when I would mention that I would like to lose weight. He would point out the meds and say it's really hard with these...

I have been seeing a new endocrinologist and (finally!) she mentioned surgery to me last November and to think about it. My hubby is totally against it and says "we" can lose weight. Ha! he is struggling to lose the 20lbs he needs to.

I have a new Rheumy and he also mentioned it this last visit and agreed that it would be a serious consideration.

I am confused and looking for all advice and information I can to make the right choice for me but I am glad to have two doctors advising me to go for it.

My PCP won't be for it, luckily she isn't part of the decision. My rheumatologist perked up when I asked her if it would be a good idea, and she started telling me benefits to the surgery that I hadn't even heard of. She referred me to a surgeon who I meet with tomorrow. My PCP probably won't know until it's over, if I decide to go through with it. Funnily, my PCP is the one who's been on me about my weight forever, but she thinks Atkins or gluten free is the way to go. Not for me.

I do my own due diligence. I don't need anyone else feeling they have any right to intervene.

My solution is simple. If my PCP was not on board or expressed any negativity, I'd drop him and get one that is more in line with my choices.

Done.

My PCP didn't give me a referral (I asked for about a year) to the bariatric surgeon until I saw a cardiologist who told her I needed it. In that time of waiting I gained 50 pounds and developed sleep apnea and asthma. I definitely should have been more proactive.

My PCP didn't give me a referral (I asked for about a year) to the bariatric surgeon until I saw a cardiologist who told her I needed it. In that time of waiting I gained 50 pounds and developed sleep apnea and asthma. I definitely should have been more proactive.

I had a neurologist that disagreed that I should need WLS for my Pseudotumor Cerebri.. Fast forward 2 years, 60 pounds, and 8263682873 spinal taps to drain fluid, a blood transfusion to patch the leak in my spine, and I started going to a different neurologist- who, on the very first visit said I've been through so much in the past 6 years, I didn't deserve to have to wait so long for someone to sign off on the surgery. And now I'm here.. 15 days post op. [emoji4] Be your own advocate! You know what is going on with your body. Nobody knows better than you.. You just need to find someone who'll listen!