Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Now I understand why we dont tell people we are getting the sleeve...



Recommended Posts

Anyone else seem to have friends and/or family that always seem to know "someone who knows someone or was married to someones ex-someone" who has had that and died??? like really people??? no you don't. stop trying to talk me out of it because you haven't taken the time to even look into what i am saying. ugh..people

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Anyone else seem to have friends and/or family that always seem to know "someone who knows someone or was married to someones ex-someone" who has had that and died??? like really people??? no you don't. stop trying to talk me out of it because you haven't taken the time to even look into what i am saying. ugh..people

For every one of the people they found about who died from this procedure:

"My next door neighbor's, best friend's, twice removed Aunt whose best friend's favorite restaurant has a person who delivers their produce and their son has a kid in their gym class who has a paper route and they think that one of their customers died during this procedure or divorced their wife and moved away, but they aren't sure";

I bet they know many more first hand who died due to complications brought on by obesity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I will go with shark attack when asked! Or...hot air balloon accident! Or....???

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a necklace with a shark's tooth on it (found it at the beach when I was a teen). I think I'll use that MsCyrus! LOL

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've Told everyone and they mama. I don't care if someone is against me so far everyone is supportive....except I have not told,my dad. He is very old fashioned..... We actually do know someone that passed but unsure if it was Lipo Tummy Tuck or what kinda weight loss thing it was...... So I know my dad will use her as an example... I'm hoping if I can explain to him that is simple like my gallbladder and it's recommended by doc he won't be so scared......surgery is in Feb so I gotta figure,out how to tell him before

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have my hernia repair at the same time so I can easily say...I had esophagus surgery and that called for a liquid only diet for 3 weeks!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Anyone else seem to have friends and/or family that always seem to know "someone who knows someone or was married to someones ex-someone" who has had that and died??? like really people??? no you don't. stop trying to talk me out of it because you haven't taken the time to even look into what i am saying. ugh..people

I actually did have a friend that had weight loss surgery years ago that passed away. She passed away not because of the surgery, but because she didn't do the right things after she had it. She had bypass surgery so she had a problem with malabsorption (sp?), she did not follow the guidelines, plain and simple. Armed with this knowledge I have made it my mission to ensure that I get my Protein, Water and Vitamins. I didn't use her experience as a negative against weight loss surgery, I used it as a learning experience.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have only told a select few but when asked directly what I am doing to lose weight I tell the truth and for the vast majority of people the response is overwhelming support. For the very few who were not supportive I just remind myself that they don't have to live in my body I do and choosing wls is my way of providing myself the best future I possibly can!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've Told everyone and they mama. I don't care if someone is against me so far everyone is supportive....except I have not told,my dad. He is very old fashioned..... We actually do know someone that passed but unsure if it was Lipo Tummy Tuck or what kinda weight loss thing it was...... So I know my dad will use her as an example... I'm hoping if I can explain to him that is simple like my gallbladder and it's recommended by doc he won't be so scared......surgery is in Feb so I gotta figure,out how to tell him before

Omg! I haven't told my dad either. He's a very old fashion Jamaican and hates western medicine. When I was in high school my cousin came up from Jamaica and she was hospitalized for some rare medical condition and died after surgery. My dad would FLIP his lid if I told him. I plan to keep it from him as long as possible. I love him dearly but he just wouldn't understand.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I only told a select few and yesterday affirmed why. I was at church and someone noticed the huge bruise on my arm where my IV blew out. She asked if I was ok and I told her I just had a medical procedure done. She smarted off that she hopes it wasn't a stupid weight loss surgery.

I didn't tell people because I didn't care to hear their opinion on what I was doing to my body. Guys seem to be more apt to put it out there, but then again men aren't caddy like women.

I got a similar comment from a co-worker...I mentioned something about a low carb diet and she says something like "I hope your not going for that weight loss surgery"...I just said ha ha and walked away

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Everyone is a doctor and they have no clue to feel like us....

So far I have told ONE family member, my boss and ONE close friend. All of whom are supportive of my decision. I attempted to tell my sister and she was very ignorant and negative with her comments like "you aren't that big" or "you don't need surgery"...I'm 260lbs!!! When should I get surgery?. ..the time is now, I don't wanna get bigger.

I really wanna tell my other best friend but she has a big mouth and a little bit of jealousy. I just can't trust her right now. Once I start losing the weight I will share with her. She's also in the 250's with crazy blood pressure and could definitely benefit from it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've Told everyone and they mama. I don't care if someone is against me so far everyone is supportive....except I have not told,my dad. He is very old fashioned..... We actually do know someone that passed but unsure if it was Lipo Tummy Tuck or what kinda weight loss thing it was...... So I know my dad will use her as an example... I'm hoping if I can explain to him that is simple like my gallbladder and it's recommended by doc he won't be so scared......surgery is in Feb so I gotta figure,out how to tell him before

Omg! I haven't told my dad either. He's a very old fashion Jamaican and hates western medicine. When I was in high school my cousin came up from Jamaica and she was hospitalized for some rare medical condition and died after surgery. My dad would FLIP his lid if I told him. I plan to keep it from him as long as possible. I love him dearly but he just wouldn't understand.
I'm so with u on that.... I'm trying to figure out how to tell him

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I did the same thing, Dub. Not like ppl aren't going to notice massive weight loss quickly. Everyone has been extremely supportive and positive. I have not had one person say a negative thing yet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My situation showed me how the people that "were so supportive" were not really being truthful. I began with my insurance company and started jumping through hoops. As I was doing that told a few people and they were all very sportive, "You have to make your personal decision of what is best for you", "Good for you!", "Let me know if there is anything I can do", "I'm so glad you are taking this step in your health".

THEN - my insurance denied me...I told them all it was denied and then I heard from the same people:

"You are going to be so glad you did not do that", "You will feel so much better that you did it on your own", "I'm glad you are not taking the easy way out", "Weight-loss surgery is for lazy and vain people, you are better than that".

Now I am going to Mexico, surgery in 2 weeks. I have told only my sister and mother, both of whom had WLS years ago and understand and really are supportive.

I hope everyone has people that will honestly be supportive. But remember you don't owe anyone an explanation of anything. I also have to have a hysterectomy with bowel and bladder repair sometime this year. I am not explaining that to anyone either. They will see I don't use the bathroom every 30 minutes, but I don't feel I have to tell anyone anything. When people see my weight loss I will say that I have decided to make some hard changes in my life and take better care of my health. I am eating better, I am not on some fad diet and I am getting more exercise.

Just be careful who you tell, remember you can't "untell" anyone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

scottyd1264,

Haha, so true…everyone’s a doctor! Not to mention a nutritionist, life coach, and fortune teller (they can see into the future and know when you’ll fail at the diet…). I’ve never figured out a way to deal with it besides lose the weight and keep it off…so I’m looking forward to you sharing your journey with us!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×