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Selfish? Work wise.



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I posted this in general but am planning on the sleeve so I wanted to touch base with everyone here due to the need for time off. Sorry if it is all over the place below, I had a really tough emotional day.

I should know this week when will have surgery but should be mid Dec. I am a little concerned as I just got back from a 10 day vacation from work. I give my all to my job and to be honest my job doesn't really care much about their employees but I do have a concern that I will be taking off.

I don't want to tell them the reason for fear they will feel it is elective and I could wait (technically i could but job stability is an issue) I guess I just needed to vent and see what others have to say about feeling bad for your job.

I know it sounds silly, most people i know think I am crazy but I feel overwhelmed at leaving my area in the state it is in (I am a district manager) but I also feel I have almost 100 hours that can be used towards FMLA and I should take time that I need.

My plan is to base it off of what the doctor suggests and then I could always try to go back part time or work from home.

Does anyone else have this stress going on when it comes to time off work? Am I being selfish as I just had vacation. (Vacation was booked earlier this yeay way before my WLS path)

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I think everyone is different but, personally I went back to work after 1 week off and do feel I could have done it sooner. I work in a factory and gave a fairly physically demanding job so I hope this shines some light on your situation. All in all I had zero pain and only some discomfort and tightness from a hernia repair.

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I posted this in general but am planning on the sleeve so I wanted to touch base with everyone here due to the need for time off. Sorry if it is all over the place below, I had a really tough emotional day.

I should know this week when will have surgery but should be mid Dec. I am a little concerned as I just got back from a 10 day vacation from work. I give my all to my job and to be honest my job doesn't really care much about their employees but I do have a concern that I will be taking off.

I don't want to tell them the reason for fear they will feel it is elective and I could wait (technically i could but job stability is an issue) I guess I just needed to vent and see what others have to say about feeling bad for your job.

I know it sounds silly, most people i know think I am crazy but I feel overwhelmed at leaving my area in the state it is in (I am a district manager) but I also feel I have almost 100 hours that can be used towards FMLA and I should take time that I need.

My plan is to base it off of what the doctor suggests and then I could always try to go back part time or work from home.

Does anyone else have this stress going on when it comes to time off work? Am I being selfish as I just had vacation. (Vacation was booked earlier this yeay way before my WLS path)

You absolutely should take whatever time you need. You do not have to tell anyone what you are having done. I just told people at work that I was having surgery. No one asked what it was for and I didn't tell them. If you plan on doing the FMLA paperwork, though, you will have to disclose on the paperwork what you are having done, but that is only supposed to be seen by your HR/FMLA person. I chose not to tell people mainly for the reason you said. I didn't want people to resent me for taking time off for something they viewed as elective. And I CERTAINLY didn't tell them what I was taking a month of for with my tummy tuck! lol.

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I took 4 weeks off for my sleeve. Physically I felt really good at 5 days post op, and GREAT at two weeks. The hardest part was getting g used to my new diet and not having to juggle work (I work as an RN is a very busy OBGYN office) and eating/drinking was a huge benefit to me. I used those four weeks to heal, focus on good hydration and nutrition, and getting out and walking every day. I think 4 weeks was perfect!

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Wish I had taken longer. I took 2 weeks and have been so tired and exhausted after just going back part time. I'm getting the cold shoulder from some of my coworkers because it was considered elective. I'm still glad I did it for me though. The worst that could happen is getting the cold shoulder at your work, and they will get over it soon. You have to look at it as doing this for your health, elective or not. I say don't feel guilty, treat yourself first!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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