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well..maybe there is hope for "real life" meeting someone



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I met someone out dancing...we are going to dinner later this week. I never get asked out, it's a Seattle thing, so this is a good thing to experience!

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Congrats! Have a great time and let us know how it goes!

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@@CowgirlJane - Pulling for you. By the way, be sure to give yourself credit for not giving up and being open for opportunities. Through all the ups and downs you are only really out when you quit trying.

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Well, it's just a date... but I guess like alot of people I have trouble meeting someone in real life (hence the online dating) so it is refreshing actually.

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Congrats to you cowgirlJane!

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Don't do anything I wouldn't do. ;- )

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Good for you! Have fun!! :)

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This post makes me happy.

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I dressed up - looking hot without hoochy...haha. I have a decent body for a 51 year old and am okay flaunting it to a man I am interested in. Much to my relief, he showed up dressed great... just perfect. I felt like we were the couple that makes middle age look not too shabby. :)

We went out to this really amazing brand new place.... hard to explain but it was like a huge complex with multiple restaurants, bars and even a 91 degree swimming pool!! (we didn't go swimming). We toured the place, laughed, and talked, had a few drinks and a yummy dinner... all good.

He was such an attentive gentleman, helped me with my jacket, treated me like a princess. It felt so wonderful. Tall, dark, handsome, age appropriate, funny, great conversationalist - I mean the kind of person you could visualize spending time with.... just too good to be true isn't it?

So, we get to the end of an amazing like 3 hour date and I say. " I had a wonderful time" and he says "Me too, I really enjoyed your company more than you know" Than I say "I would like to see you again". (I am a big believer in stating my interest and letting him decide what to do with it.) Then there is an odd pause.... and he says his schedule can be difficult. I thought.... okay, weird, I guess my magical evening wasn't a mutual experience. Then it dawns on me... "your married aren't you?" Yup

Can you effing believe it? Apparently wifey is out of town this week. Can you effing believe it?

I realize this is very much an emotional response to a big disappointment, but I feel ready to give up. I deserve a man like this who is actually available and not decietiful would be a bonus.

I did meet someone else recently - I am trying to do what my counselor said which is to not zero in too quickly. My someone else has many great attributes but not so charming, a very lame dresser and as a 50% parent of teen kids not as available as I would prefer - but of course leaps and bounds better than effing married!!! My thoughts right now are... don't be such a sucker and give less charming dude a more serious chance with me. Or else give up entirely.

Can you tell I am pissed?

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@@CowgirlJane I would be pissed off too!!! What a complete jerk. The nerve of that guy. He is probably charming because he has to be to juggle all his women.

If the lame dresser guy works out- you can have some fun shopping for him!!

Sorry your date took a nose dive.

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Let me start by saying kudos to you for getting back in the game of dating. The married guy, well he's an ass. The lame dresser, he might just be the one. He just might need some help in the clothing dept. He might be a shabby sheik prince charming, don't give up on him. And as for getting serious about someone, date around see what's out there, you are still young. Like e life to the fullest.

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That is just unbelievable!! What the hell did you say to him when you found out he is married?? He would have certainly gotten a piece of my mind. I hope you made him feel like the piece of shitt he is.

I can understand why all that is discouraging. But the right one will come along. For what it's worth, I agree with your counselor. Maybe be willing to look past some of the superficial things (you can always help a lame dresser ;)). You are a beautiful person inside and out, and you DO deserve someone of equal caliber. You'll find him.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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