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The universe is against me



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I have been so angry lately it feels like everyone is just so annoying. or just plain stupid. Just a little history: There is a lot on my plate. My mother passed away in February. My husband was in a coma for a while and he got out of it and seemed to be doing fine before I decided to have surgery. But the last few weeks something changed and he started experience major mood swings and having difficulty breathing or having any energy at all. So I have been doing everything again around the house, working, and managing his doctor appointments. Which normally I don't mind i would rather do everything because I'm a control freak and want to make sure it gets done. But I have been getting so irritated with lil things and everything. The other day I came home, and thank God my husband was at a doctor appointment, i just flipped out and started throwing things in my house. I was losing it! and I couldn't stop. I was just so mad that he left the sugar bowl on the counter that I have asked him several times to put away when he is done.. But it just flipped me out. When he got home i asked him for a smoke and he wouldn't give me one. and when he asked why and I told him he got mad at me. I don't like to make him mad because of all the has been threw so i have in and apologized. but now i am at WORK and would like to have a new job. I cant stand it.. when I used to love my JOB.. something is wrong and I just dont understand. I was told you can experience irritability but this is just crazy~!

sleeved on 09/17/15.

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im not sure what you are eating but one thing i noticed was no sugar, low sodium, no carbs and no caffeine - like in the first 2 weeks post op - i had NO mood swings at all like i used to. food rage is a real thing. look into it. good luck

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It is the weight loss and hormone release from the fat burning off. The first month I had serious mood swings. Luckily I live alone and I don't have to work with anyone so I had less things to set me off. 6 weeks out seemed to really be a turning point with me, everything was better.

We have the same surgeon :)

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I had some mood swings around a week post op but mine were sadness and depression, not fits of rage. I think everyone is affected in different ways by their hormones after surgery. One thing that really helped me has been talking to a therapist. I've only seen him twice since my surgery but it has already helped tremendously.

Given the uniqueness of the situation, I can't say for sure what will work for you. My best advice is to not beat yourself up about it. Try to be nice to yourself and your body first (by talking to someone, getting the proper nutrients, getting enough sleep, etc.) then hopefully the rest will fall into place.

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You HAVE got a lot on your plate, and a lot of change to adjust to. And the changes with the loss of your mom and your husband's health are changes that have been thrust upon you, and completely out of your control.

If you are not already getting some counseling, I'd really suggest it would be a great investment in your health.

Edited by 2goldengirl

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Nope, you're not alone in this. Hormones are getting dumped into your system. Case in point:

http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/343777-guys-room-is-everyone-else-overly-emotional-or-am-i-just-an-ae/

Any of that sound familiar?

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You've clearly been through the wringer.

What a tough year....now everything is falling on your shoulders......AND you are recovering from surgery.

All you can do is your best.

Maybe there is a way you can blow off some steam every day.....every day. An hour of your own to go power walk around the block. An hour of vigorous walking can be a pressure relief valve and maybe help with the frustration.

I'm very sorry and wish you the best.

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It is the weight loss and hormone release from the fat burning off. The first month I had serious mood swings. Luckily I live alone and I don't have to work with anyone so I had less things to set me off. 6 weeks out seemed to really be a turning point with me, everything was better.

We have the same surgeon :)

hi! When did u have u get sleeved

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Thank you all for your responses! I just had my 1 month check up and the doctor agreed. Mood swings are normal after having a major surgery. She recommended me talking to my primary doctor to see if I could take depression meds. I have taken anxiety meds before and still have some. She said it would be ok to start taking them when I get CRAZY! However I can't stand taking meds, so I asked the doctor about marij and she said definitely not in the first 12 weeks

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It sounds like what you really need is some support. You've gone through a lot recently, not including the surgery. My suggestion would be to see a therapist. Primary care physicians are generally not very well educated in psychopharmacological interventions, whereas a psychologist generally is (though not as much as a psychiatrist). They would be able to provide you with therapy, as well as help you to think about whether meds would be in your best interest and which would be best suited to your symptoms.

Edited by Rena H

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

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