I have started this journey with great expectations. I have went to the seminar & had my consult w/ surgeon, which I adored. I had my psych eval yesterday & start nutritionist visits next week... Hoping for surgery in December. Pushing 300lbs. Have yo-yo'd for about 10 years losing 10-80lbs... Have gained 46 in the last year & a half, lost 10 last month. Lucky enough to not have any other major health issues yet. Mostly just shame & embarrassment that I let myself get in this shape... Leading to depression & seclusion myself from the outside world which is hard with kiddos & you have to force yourself to be happy & fake. I miss who I used to be & am ready to get to know her again... Hello confidence & self esteem. Anyone else just wanna hide? Even from themselves?

Hi there,

I read tour post and completely empathize with as I feel the same way. I am just shy of 300lbs, and am still active, but not like I used to be. I have two young kids and I avoid doing things because I am ashamed of my size. I feel so reclusive and isolated. I want to really start living again, which is why I have finally decided that barbaric surgery might be the answer. I am still looking at where to get it done. I am from Canada and the wait here is 2-5 years. I am looking at trying to find a private clinic in the US or in Mexico. Scared though of leaving my country for surgery...

Congrats on making the decision! From everything I have read on these sites, everyone is happy they went through with the surgery.

Hope all goes well with your surgery!

Thank you mokt. My children are teenagers & so I'm not "active" with them anymore but, I feel like I embarrass them with my weight. My son is a senior in high school, graduating in December- going to the navy in January so he is all fit & active preparing for boot camp. My daughter is a 16 y.o. Cheerleader, need I say more? Lol & my husband spends 2-3 hours/day in the gym, very fit & muscular. And then there's me... Feeling like I don't fit in, even with my own family. I want to live again. My world has revolved around my children for the last 18 years. They are almost grown, I am going to have to learn to live again, when they are grown & gone. I may as well do that fit & healthy. #newlife

You could come to Indiana for surgery... Not as far as some places in US. I have one of the best doctors in the Midwest. Very happy with my choice...

@cj76....I feel like we are very similar. I have put on a lot of weight in the last year and really didn't even realize it was happening until I tried to put on Fall clothes from last season that were "big" on me but now I look like a sausage in casing. My children are all active and very slender and my husband is also athletic. I stick out and feel like I don't look like I belong with them. I am seriously short, 5' and fluctuate between 210-220. It just keeps creeping up..

I should be having surgery in Dec. had my psych evaluation, 2 nut visits, & my EGD is scheduled for Nov 5th. After that, I should be good to go.

I love this forum though because it's nice to see others that feel the same way I do. ????

@@cj76 You describe a very similar situation with my family......tall, fit and trim son and wife, both active.....heck, even our dogs are fit and active.

Then there is me. Imagine a big football player, who still thinks he's ready to hit the field.......then add 30 years of beer, steaks, pizza, etc, etc.

You are so very smart to get this thing done BEFORE the health issues have arrived. I can speak with painful experience that arthritis doesn't play well with being overweight.

It used to be where I could lose 50 lbs and feel great relief on the knees and such. This time around it hasn't been so. Having to only use Tylenol these past two weeks hasn't been fun. Hurting all over and grouchy as heck. Massive abdominal hernia poked out like and alien trying to bust out.

To say that I"m ready for my surgery next week is an understatement. I'm enthused and excited, just like you described.

I hope to reach the point where someone will see my tall and fit 16 year old son, wife and then me and say, "Well, we see where the handsome young guy gets his genes". His excellent grades are obviously from his mom.......maybe I can at least lay partial claim to his looks.

Just kidding. I am serious about how great it is going to be when I reach the point where I no longer need prescription meds for blood pressure, cholesterol, arthritis and disc pain from slowly healing injury......and re-injury. Ah...the days ahead when the only pills I take are simply the chewable supplement tabs. Looking forward to this bigtime.

I do have to admit, though, that it will be really cool cleaning out my closet and buying clothes that are no longer big & tall sizes......just tall. I haven't worn blue jeans in 20 years. Thats' gonna change. Some comfortable Levi's and worn in cowboy boots will be my default wear.

I hope the path before you goes well. It sounds like you have the perfect timing to do this and a great supportive family to stand by you. I'll bet you feel like a teenager again and will be mistaken for your kids older sister whose looking superfine.

Good luck Dub! I know you're excited & it's right around the corner. I'm so jealous. I have a very difficult time with patience. I wish I could do it now. But, I have my first nutrition is Friday so, I can't wait to see what lies ahead...

Good luck Dub! I know you're excited & it's right around the corner. I'm so jealous. I have a very difficult time with patience. I wish I could do it now. But, I have my first nutrition is Friday so, I can't wait to see what lies ahead...

Thank you.

I promise that it will be here quick.

The time is broken up by the different events you have to attend along the way.

My biggest regret was that I wasn't very active during that time. Work and rest. Sort of limited due to healing up some injuries and didn't want to incur any more. Being active on frequent gym visits would have really made it fly by....as well made me feel more empowered during the prep time.

Right on.... I'm starting back to the gym today after work & im in a beach body challenge group, 21 day fix that starts today so this month will fly. Hoping to lose another 10-15lbs this month. Lost 10 in September with the challenge group. Had a death in the family during that time that made it difficult to stick with the commitment the entire time but this month will rock.

There will always be things that come up... I usually just give up but, I jumped back on as soon as I could. Daily struggle, daily victories! Overall win!

I can lose weight, I just can't stick with it long term. I can lose 40-80lbs, get sidetracked in "life" & it all comes back & then some. Never ever dreamed I'd be pushing 300lbs. Can't wait to find me again... She's in here somewhere!

Right on.... I'm starting back to the gym today after work & im in a beach body challenge group, 21 day fix that starts today so this month will fly. Hoping to lose another 10-15lbs this month. Lost 10 in September with the challenge group. Had a death in the family during that time that made it difficult to stick with the commitment the entire time but this month will rock.

There will always be things that come up... I usually just give up but, I jumped back on as soon as I could. Daily struggle, daily victories! Overall win!

I can lose weight, I just can't stick with it long term. I can lose 40-80lbs, get sidetracked in "life" & it all comes back & then some. Never ever dreamed I'd be pushing 300lbs. Can't wait to find me again... She's in here somewhere!

I hear ya !!!!

You are going to hit a home run this time around. The results will be so impressive and the changes so fundamental that you're old ways will be tossed aside.

You are already well ahead of the game.

I'm excited for you and look forward to seeing your progress through the months ahead.

I feel the same as you guys in this post, getting close to 300 #,s and I forget how to live, when I do things with hubby and the kids/grandkids, I'm the one who is out of breath, plus I REALLY need some support,my family tries BUT I don't think the understand my struggle, I know what to do and what not to do but I fall off the wagon almost every day, I think being depressed about who I have become is really deterring my weight loss.