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How did you handle the nay sayers ?



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Thanks you guys I needed to hear these things. Not telling her would not be an option. As mad as she gonna be and worried I could never go to Mexico and not tell her. I also am a single mother and my daughter will not be going with me. I do have a back up plan if my mom refuses to keep her thinking that would keep me from going. This is all contingent on not getting approved through insurance.

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Just had this convo with my mom and she was not happy about me going to MX. I explained to her that I've done the research and I understand my possible outcomes and that it will be in God's hands. She asked a hundred questions and then I changed the subject. Lol. I just asked her to be positive with me about it and about my post surgery life. I explained the facts about my current health and the future prospects with our families health history as that this surgery is less of a risk than staying fat. She agreed with that idea. She's still very concerned especially about me being left high and dry at the airport, the dr being a sham, being kidnapped...that about sums it up. ???? I definitely get it. All most people in the US have to go on is what the media talks about and movies. I get her legit concerns (post op complications and care) and I share them tbh but I'm just believing for a great complication free surgery and post op. She wants me to call her every step of the way and I'm fine with that.

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I completely understand your feelings and frustration. I went to my husband and he was about to die. I put him on all the forums for the company I chose to help plan my surgery....ummmmmm....needless to say that didn't help. His focus is the same as katalystic's friend, drug trafficking and organ sales. He further said he's not coming with me because he doesn't support my decision to go to TJ. He's always bringing it up, so finally I said shut up about it. I am not asking for permission I'm telling you what I am going to do. His opinion won't change my mind.

It's sad he's never weighed over 160 lbs soak and wet, but don't understand how I feel carrying 300lbs daily plus 2 stomachs. I'm a cute girl, but taking 4 shots of insulin and 3 blood pressure pills is too much. Let me not even start on all the illness I have developed with being overweight.

My advice is to tell her to fu-- off because until she walks a mile in your shoes dont judge. Either be supportive or shut up!!!

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Just had this convo with my mom and she was not happy about me going to MX. I explained to her that I've done the research and I understand my possible outcomes and that it will be in God's hands. She asked a hundred questions and then I changed the subject. Lol. I just asked her to be positive with me about it and about my post surgery life. I explained the facts about my current health and the future prospects with our families health history as that this surgery is less of a risk than staying fat. She agreed with that idea. She's still very concerned especially about me being left high and dry at the airport, the dr being a sham, being kidnapped...that about sums it up. I definitely get it. All most people in the US have to go on is what the media talks about and movies. I get her legit concerns (post op complications and care) and I share them tbh but I'm just believing for a great complication free surgery and post op. She wants me to call her every step of the way and I'm fine with that.

Reassure that THOUSANDS of Americans go to Mexico for surgery every year. Ask her to recall ONE story in the news about an American going to Mexico for surgery and being killed, kidnapped, or having their organs stolen. These are all urban legends and the plots of movies. If she can name ONE instance in the real news, out of the THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of people who go to Mexico for surgery, I'd be impressed.

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I'd be tempted to add: In the shape my organs are in, I'd have to pay someone to harvest them. And if they're planning a kidnapping I hope they had the forethought to bring along a tow truck. I'm like a dinosaur, so a single dart will never bring me down!

In my world sarcasm reigns supreme! ????

Edited by The Candidate

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Lol...I agree @@The Candidate

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This weekend was very difficult. My father and step-mother think I'm crazy for wanting to go TJ. They brought up drugs (cartel, infections, lack of skill of surgeons etc... I would counter and even showed them information that differed from what they said. There are so many people that get the surgery and are doing great. There are doctors in the USA that are not good either. I like the doctor that I choose and the support group is great. I'm just going to do it and never talk to them about it.

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@Dml77....as Madea (Tyler Perry's character) say " folks gonna talk til the day you die...it ain't what they call you its what you answer to"...lol...do what you think is best for you...I personally see it as an opportunity to save my life...although my husband doesn't agree and I refuse to tell anyone else im doing I think is best because I did the research not them!!! Don't be surprised if they bring it up often because my husband does and I change the subject

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Thanks for the words of encouragement. You are right, I have to follow what I know I have researched and not listen to people who have done zero research.

Edited by dml77

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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