If I hear him say one more time how the wls is going to be so difficult that I won't be able to handle it..

And why can't I just make good choices & eat less to lose weight?

He is a very sweet, compassionate man and I adore him but his lack of understanding of why I need and want this is frustrating! (13 years of struggling with being overweight and depressed because of it)

He is usually supportive, but in this situation on one hand he just says I am find and he loves me how I am & the other side of it is that he doesn't understand my struggle with my weight and trying to lose it.

Can anyone relate? It's annoying when anyone without a weight problem says those things :-/

Edited April 19, 201511 yr by Butterfly512

My husband was very supportive of me having the surgery, and "all that went with it". He started to eat healthier, he opted to join the health club with me, has bragged about my weight loss thus far and took me shopping. However, when the real work begins is when he starts getting all attitude! He wants to go visit friends and I need to get the small amount of food in that I can have and I can't rush it, yet here he is like an impatient child waiting for me to finish eating. I get nauseous and sick on a day we have plans and next thing you know he is arguing with me about it! I am trying to re-assure him that once I get to about 2 months post op I should have a pretty good handle on my diet and food intake and schedule but until then things can just be up in the air from time to time, which he "says" he understands till the day comes when it actually happens and then I feel like I'm dealing with my sons toddler years all over again!!! SMH!!! OK sorry, rant over but just needed to vent.

Edited April 19, 201511 yr by Loss78

Butterfly,

Do you think he is maybe concerned about how you will feel about him once you are all thinned down and healthy? He wouldn't be the first husband to feel threatened in that way! Just a thought...

I think maybe that's part of it..but maybe not...

I am sure He definitely won't mind when I lose weight & become the hot wife! Lol

I think he's more worried that the struggle will continue when I have the surgery and have to adapt to my new diet/lifestyle, because I have already been on many different diets and he's dealt with the aftermath everytime I fail and beat myself up for it & how cranky I get when I limit my calories/carbs drastically.

He's trying to be supportive, but he just doesn't understand, has never had a weight problem and thinks it should be easy to just eat less to lose weight

@@Butterfly512 OMG are we living the same life? Seriously this is getting creepy. Different hubbys, same mentality.

My husband was very supportive of me having the surgery, and "all that went with it". He started to eat healthier, he opted to join the health club with me, has bragged about my weight loss thus far and took me shopping. However, when the real work begins is when he starts getting all attitude! He wants to go visit friends and I need to get the small amount of food in that I can have and I can't rush it, yet here he is like an impatient child waiting for me to finish eating. I get nauseous and sick on a day we have plans and next thing you know he is arguing with me about it! I am trying to re-assure him that once I get to about 2 months post op I should have a pretty good handle on my diet and food intake and schedule but until then things can just be up in the air from time to time, which he "says" he understands till the day comes when it actually happens and then I feel like I'm dealing with my sons toddler years all over again!!! SMH!!! OK sorry, rant over but just needed to vent.

My husband was like that at first, however that nauseous and sick feelings hang around long after 2 months. I've had my lap band for 7 years now I still throw up and I still have that sick feeling days. As for hubby he just deals with it and now really doesn't complain now.

when i had the first operation on my ear this summer the hubby was supper involved and supportive helped me in and out of bed bought me a cane to walk with because i was too unsteady to walk on my own bought me food even after i had thrown up my food all day for days at a time. so i am blessed he doesn't know how long ill need him after the sleeve surgery but i know for sure he will be there patient as always

My husband was on board from the 1st doc apt ... he's been my shoulder, my cheerleader, my rock and my sounding board .... I couldn't have done this without him ... nor would I want to ...

However ... we work together ... at a trucking company ... so I'm around men all day long ... a lot of them are on the road for weeks at a time ... so they're always wanting to talk ... my hubby isn't a jealous person .. he knows where my heart lies ...

but since loosing some weight .. he's overheard the drivers on occasion commenting about how good I'm looking and on and on ... that makes him smile inside ... but he also watches them! LOL

I agree with a lot of the posters ahead of me ... surgery is scary ... and this surgery is a LIFE CHANGER ... there is a lot of understand ... a lot of changes to be made across the board ... it's not just your life your changing .... it's his too ... and kids if you have them ...

He may just need a little more education ... and a little more assurance that you'll still be you ... just less of you ... which is a good thing for EVERYONE ... you get to live longer and healthier ... and he gets to enjoy more time with you