So you thought my husband cheated on me eh!?

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

Punctuation is not my priority in telling this story. Nor is my sentence form correct. Read at your own reading risk! LOL

I hardly see anyone notice me anymore. It has become common place for me to walk around now without anyone coming up to me and acting all surprised when they find out who I am. Most people have done their thing and I can move around freely now without a scene. Also I am in a new place/world where I have gathered new friends and so they do not know the history. I will tell if I decide to but not now!

Let me tell you the latest!

My hubby and I were in the supermarket in a huddle going over our receipt. The cashier was the fastest on the register I have ever seen and so I wanted to make sure that she did not double charge me or over charge me or not charge me at all for my items in my cart.

I happened to look up as the bank manager was passing by us. She knew it was my hubby as he stands at 6'3" but she did not recognize the woman beside him. I looked up and saw the look she gave my hubby as she slowly moved past us. Then our eyes locked and she gave me a look that would make any right minded woman feel guilty of being a home wrecker straight away. She then looked away in disgust and began to move her cart forward again.

A few moments passed and she turned to take yet another look. Our eyes locked again. And she stopped dead in her tracks. I knew who she was! She is the person who looked at me like I was a piece of trash when I tried twice to say hello to her at the bank. She would sweep past me and give me a don't bother me look or worse.

Anyway I digress, she said Jane is that you? Jane is that really you? I nodded and she gasped! Look at you she screamed, and your hair, your so beautiful. Oh my god I would have never recognized you....bla bla bla!

I looked at her and said you thought Roy cheated on me and I was the new woman right!? Well yes she said. I said I have tried to talk to you twice at the bank and you were rude to me. Otherwise you would have known it was me and this scene would not be happening here. She laughed and said she did not remember seeing me. She started touching my hair and looking me over closely. I was starting to feel uncomfortable.

My kids used to tell me that she was not nice to them when they got older and started to deal with the bank themselves. I would defend her and say no she is nice, she is just doing her job. But they were right and I was not!

This is what bothered me about the whole thing. She thought that my hubby was the kind that would dump me because I was fluffy, obese, fat whatever word you want to use. She was judging his character to be weak and superficial. You don't stay married for 37 years without some attachment and love for the person your with.

Automatically thinking that he left me because of my shell really pi**es me off. Do people really look at couples and think that if one of them are obese that the mate is looking to end the relationship at some point. Are they so stupid!

Long rant I know.

[Geron Girls 70]

I'm so sorry. Good for you for setting her staight!

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

As we lose the weight, we see sides of people we didn't or weren't willing to see before. I'm glad you called her on it while it was happening. And touching your hair? Ew.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Did she say she thought he left you because you were bigger or are you assuming that? I'm confused.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

Did she say she thought he left you because you were bigger or are you assuming that? I'm confused.

It was implied. She does not know me personally. I just did bank business with her. No she answered quickly and as she commented on my body and looks. The implication was that he left me for that reason. When a person is face to face with another some of us can pretty much tell what another is thinking as I saw the color change when I said it.

She is not the first person to think that Roy left me because I was fat and he found someone who wasn't.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

As we lose the weight, we see sides of people we didn't or weren't willing to see before. I'm glad you called her on it while it was happening. And touching your hair? Ew.

You got that right...For some reason I don't hang with any of my old crowd. I am out looking for new friends...Any takers...lol

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

Unintended consequences of WLS. lad you set her straight! Perhaps she learned a lesson.

No I don't think she did. I think that she is just that way and I just did not see that side of her. She was always so liquid sweet but all I was really looking for was a loan or something to do with my banking. Never really thought about her as a person until I tried to say hello to her a couple of times recently.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Did she say she thought he left you because you were bigger or are you assuming that? I'm confused.

It was implied. She does not know me personally. I just did bank business with her. No she answered quickly and as she commented on my body and looks. The implication was that he left me for that reason. When a person is face to face with another some of us can pretty much tell what another is thinking as I saw the color change when I said it.

She is not the first person to think that Roy left me because I was fat and he found someone who wasn't.

Ahhhh.... I see. I'm not one of those who can "pretty much tell what another is thinking". Perhaps that is why I'm considered a bit more forward or abrasive?

I tend to ask people outright what's on their minds. They don't always like it, but there is no room for misconceptions.

I did have a cashier ask me once if I was getting a divorce because I had lost so much weight and was in the market all dressed up/made up. I was actually on my way home from a conference I was speaking at and it was my 19th anniversary.

People are strange birds...

[LipstickLady 25,682]

As we lose the weight, we see sides of people we didn't or weren't willing to see before. I'm glad you called her on it while it was happening. And touching your hair? Ew.

I guess I've been really fortunate in my life. I've only had one instance where someone clearly treated me differently after I lost my weight and I called her on it.

None of my friends or family treat me any differently, none of the parents at my kids' schools act differently around me, my circle of besties hasn't grown or shrank. I'm very lucky.

As for someone touching my hair? I'd cut off their hand. I hate that more than anything and because I have long curly hair, people reach out and try to touch it all the time. Never more than once, though.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

Did she say she thought he left you because you were bigger or are you assuming that? I'm confused.

It was implied. She does not know me personally. I just did bank business with her. No she answered quickly and as she commented on my body and looks. The implication was that he left me for that reason. When a person is face to face with another some of us can pretty much tell what another is thinking as I saw the color change when I said it.

She is not the first person to think that Roy left me because I was fat and he found someone who wasn't.

Ahhhh.... I see. I'm not one of those who can "pretty much tell what another is thinking". Perhaps that is why I'm considered a bit more forward or abrasive?

I tend to ask people outright what's on their minds. They don't always like it, but there is no room for misconceptions.

I did have a cashier ask me once if I was getting a divorce because I had lost so much weight and was in the market all dressed up/made up. I was actually on my way home from a conference I was speaking at and it was my 19th anniversary.

People are strange birds...

Did she say she thought he left you because you were bigger or are you assuming that? I'm confused.

It was implied. She does not know me personally. I just did bank business with her. No she answered quickly and as she commented on my body and looks. The implication was that he left me for that reason. When a person is face to face with another some of us can pretty much tell what another is thinking as I saw the color change when I said it.

She is not the first person to think that Roy left me because I was fat and he found someone who wasn't.

Ahhhh.... I see. I'm not one of those who can "pretty much tell what another is thinking". Perhaps that is why I'm considered a bit more forward or abrasive?

I tend to ask people outright what's on their minds. They don't always like it, but there is no room for misconceptions.

I did have a cashier ask me once if I was getting a divorce because I had lost so much weight and was in the market all dressed up/made up. I was actually on my way home from a conference I was speaking at and it was my 19th anniversary.

People are strange birds...

I did say it straight out. I could have punched her in the gut but thought better of it since I would have been arrested. My circumstances after WLS have not matched yours and my experiences in life have not matched yours. I have had this experience more then one since surgery and it has left a bad taste in my mouth. For to me it is yet another misconception in society that we love one another for our shells. Not what is beneath.

I am not the type to be abrasive. It does not work for me. That is why I was tolerant of the hair stroking thing. It gave me the willies!

[gowalking 10,790]

I think people make presumptions all the time. As far as being treated differently after weight loss, my experience has only been positive thank goodness. I'm sure it's mostly because I'm so much more mobile and healthy now. My friends and family are so happy for me on that front. The looking more attractive part is the icing on the cake.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

I think people make presumptions all the time. As far as being treated differently after weight loss, my experience has only been positive thank goodness. I'm sure it's mostly because I'm so much more mobile and healthy now. My friends and family are so happy for me on that front. The looking more attractive part is the icing on the cake.

That is so wonderful for you..Awesome Possum!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Good for you for standing up for yourself! You deserve to be treated well.