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Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual & Transgendered Bandsters

I've been spending a lot of time in Rants & Raves since I joined LBT, partly because it's fun, but also because for the most part it's very GLBT friendly. Unless I haven't looked in the right place, I don't think there's a support thread for us, so I decided to start one!

A little about me. I'm Eddie & I'm a 42-year-old Gay man. I have a partner of just over nine years (henceforth referred to as DH), a 17-year-old son and 16-year-old daughter. DH and I are stupid. Don't believe me, just ask our kids. DH has hypothyroidism and had not been able to lose any weight after his thyroid "went nuts" several years ago. I've just been overweight all my life. He was banded on 2/21/07 and I'm getting mine next Wednesday (5/16). I can't wait!

Anyway, I would love to hear from all the GLBT folks out there. Hopefully this can be a place for us to freely discuss our unique issues and get support we may not be able to get elsewhere.

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Hello everyone

I was banded on October 1, 2009. Had my first fill on Nov 1. I was doing really well with my weight loss for 6 weeks, but the last two weeks I have gained a pound. I'm thinking I probably just need another fill - so I'm going to be making an appointment on Monday.

I am a gay man, 24 years old, in Vancouver Canada (Olympics in 3 months). I am a 4th year IT student, and am really excited to graduate in less than a year. So, things seem to be going pretty good - except their not. I'm clinically depressed, not comfortable with my body, and not 100% comfortable with my sexuality. I classify myself as gay, except I'm not "happy". I am out to some family and friends, but definitely not who I want to be. It really has been a big issue in my life - one which usually leads to my compulsive eating, eating, and more eating! So, I know if I want to be successful with this band, I need to work out my issues. However, I also feel that being fat is hindering my ability to work on this issue. The reason why is that when I imagine people being out (or coming out), I imagine thin guys. I know this is very stereotypical, but it's the way I feel. Don't get me wrong, I love big queens, bears, etc. However, I seem to only ever seen older big queens, bears, etc. Being 24 is making this very difficult for me. I really hope I haven't offended anyone, because I really don't mean to. Really, I think the question I have for all of you reading this, is how has your weight affected your comfortableness around your sexuality - and how did it change with your weight loss?

I'm also trying to figure out if I need to lose weight first to help me work on my sexuality issues, or work on my sexuality issues so that it will help me lose weight???

Thank you all for reading this. I just want to feel free and be myself!!

I'm also trying to figure out if I need to lose weight first to help me work on my sexuality issues, or work on my sexuality issues so that it will help me lose weight???

hey timmers... i am sorry you are struggling with your sexuality. my best advice to you is to "just be". don't define it. be yourself.

i think you ask a good question. our shrinks tell us that our weight is an indicator to some underlying issues. but as fat queers we are also dealing with the fact that we exisit in a community that is indeed image based -- be it thin guys or guys and girls who live within assigned roles that express their sexuality. so i think this compounds our issues.

i say work on your weight. get healthy. find things other than food to keep you busy. the rest will fall into place.

kind of related...i have a sneaky suspicion that my dad thinks if i lose weight i will become straight. :confused::)

Thanks for your reply mom.on.the.go.

Yes, I'm trying to work on the "just being" part. My counsellor actually suggested something very similar (to just pretend that I am out to everyone and that all is good about it - so this way I don't feel stressed about it). So, I'm working on just loosening up. It's just going to be so hard considering I've spent my entire life NOT "being"

I got my second fill today - feel so much better! I ate half of a chicken hard taco and felt full! So, I'm really happy that I am back on my path of weight loss. Losing the weight through eating well and exercising is going to make me happy, which will definitely help me deal with all of my other issues.

Haha, I think it's funny that you said that your dad thinks that if you lose weight, you will become straight. Because, I think it's the exact opposite with my dad. I think he's afraid that if I lose weight, I'll become more gay. So, he's definitely going to be trying to sabotage me this entire process. Luckily, I recognise that this is his problem and not mine, so I really hope I will be able to make it through this stronger in the end.

Hope you're all having a good day! Cheers~

  • 4 weeks later...

Hi all! I just got banded Dec. 18th and am feeling great! I have not really had any pain or soreness, and I am still not hungry! I am having a super hard time with my liquid diet because it seems that all the high Protein liquids are sweet drinks. I have never been a fan of sweets, so I am ready to just drink Water and tomato juice, but I know I wouldn't get my nutrients. I have lost 10 lbs in the last 9 days since surgery, so thats a bonus!

I am a single lesbian in western CO. I have my MA in education and work as a 5th grade teacher. I had the surgery over the break, and only had to take one day off. My students know I was having surgery, but not what kind. I am sure they will start to notice the weight loss over the next 6 months until summer. I am not sure exactly what to say if the issue comes up, but I am sure I'll figure it out.

I love the outdoors, music, movies, and travel. I am looking forward to be able to really travel and get around once I am at a healthier weight. I am also seriously considering moving to the Houston area, but would like to have some advice about that (just incase any who reads this has some!). I would like to chat and see how everyone else's experiences are going and maybe meet some bandster friends!

Hi all! I just got banded Dec. 18th and am feeling great! I have not really had any pain or soreness, and I am still not hungry! I am having a super hard time with my liquid diet because it seems that all the high Protein liquids are sweet drinks. I have never been a fan of sweets, so I am ready to just drink Water and tomato juice, but I know I wouldn't get my nutrients. I have lost 10 lbs in the last 9 days since surgery, so thats a bonus!

I am a single lesbian in western CO. I have my MA in education and work as a 5th grade teacher. I had the surgery over the break, and only had to take one day off. My students know I was having surgery, but not what kind. I am sure they will start to notice the weight loss over the next 6 months until summer. I am not sure exactly what to say if the issue comes up, but I am sure I'll figure it out.

I love the outdoors, music, movies, and travel. I am looking forward to be able to really travel and get around once I am at a healthier weight. I am also seriously considering moving to the Houston area, but would like to have some advice about that (just incase any who reads this has some!). I would like to chat and see how everyone else's experiences are going and maybe meet some bandster friends!

Welcome! powders?utm_source=BariatricPal&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=CommentLink" target="_ad" data-id="1" >unjury makes an unflavored Protein powder. I havnt tried it yet but if you dont like the sweetness of some of the others try that. I unfortunately just had my band removed after having some problems. I hope you have great success with yours!

  • 2 weeks later...

Hi All

I am Evita. I got banded on 12/22/09 so I am on my 3rd post op week with a 4lb loss so far.

I HAD a partner but we broke up on New Year's Eve, so yeah, bad timing for a beginning post opper.

Today was the first day I ATE my feelings and I dont physically feel bad (since I dont have any restriction), but I do wish if I was going to cheat it would be becuase I wanted to not because of her.

Oh twell.

I have more than 100 lbs I want to lose and I am hopefull that this was the surgery that can help me get there.

The most important thing I learned since banding is that it is not a magic bullet (minds out of the gutter. lol). Meaning that it is still ALOT of work.

Edited by inEVITAblyme
sp

hi evita...

welcome to band-life. i am a 37 year old lesbian mom. i was banded in november. try to work on the feelings thing now. i know from experience they don't just go away.

feel free to pm me if you need to talk.

heidi

  • 4 months later...

Hey there!

I'm Chelsie and I'm an 18yr old lesbian in NZ (any other kiwis here?).

I'm 1 week post op and everything's going fine except for picking up a throat/mouth infection which is putting me off wanting to drink my shakes even more. :laugh:

There's not much of a variety of powder and liquid Proteins on the market in NZ - everything's sickeningly sweet and bloatingly milky which are two things I detest. Thank goodness it's not forever. :w00t:

I'm saving up for a trip to America to visit all my friends in March 2011, knowing I'll fit in the plane seats with room to spare! :frown:

I've reached my first milestone and I'm thinking to Celebrate my new-found confidence I'll volunteer at Rainbow Youth as a buddy for younger people! :Yawn:

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