Still seeing a fat girl?

[HotButterFly 981]

I can't even wrap my head around the phenomenon of still "seeing" a fat person in the mirror that other ppl experience. I UNDERSTAND the *concept of body image distortion, I just can't wrap my head around it. I guess it's one of those things you have to experience for yourself to truly grasp it.

XOXOXOXO

[jtickle 295]

Think seriously about seeing a professional. I do and I know she is helping me to not sabotage myself. There are alot of psychological issues behind body image dysfunction and I am starting to explore it with the therapist. I dropped alot of weight once before and put it back on along with another 40 more and I just can't allow myself to get off track again.

If I were depressed and a jerk to everyone, I hope someone -- a friend, stranger, whoever -- would suggest I did something about that.

Chances are being depressed and acting like a jerk isn't a permanent condition you have to live with forever.

I seen my psychiatrist the other day and he knows about it. I do therapy with him , since I refuse to see another therapist because the last one I seen laughed at my not so lavish lifestyle. I was having to live with family at the time. He adjusted my medicine and switched one for another. I feel like I am starting this med thing all over again, like when I was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder. He agreed that I have body image issues and that I will need to work through them.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Tickle, i saw your other thread and now understand your situation better than I did before. Very, very best to you. But you've got to get these new behaviors under control!

[ohh_mandyy 211]

Thank you everyone for y'all's kind words! I'm thinking of getting some counseling for the issue. I really want to enjoy my new body as much as possible.

[NewBeginning2014 45]

mandyy--you look GREAT!! I can relate to how you are feeling. I was sleeved four months ago and am down 52lbs since. (hit 149lbs today!) I still see myself as the bigger me, although I know I'm not. Funny, when I was big, I didn't think I was "that big" and when I am smaller, I don't think I am "that much smaller" until I try to get dressed and my favorite 'fat' clothes look ridiculous!!

The rollercoaster of losing and gaining for so many years has me thinking, at times, this is only temporary and that fat chick will be back soon...which I also know isn't true. This loss isn't because of a fad diet, diet pills or fasting. My thought process and whole lifestyle have changed. The sleeve was the tool I needed to realize it was possible to break the cycle. I exercise, which I haven't done since I was forced to participate in gym class in school, and I enjoy it. I think (or I don't think) about food like I did in the past. I think that as time progresses and the changes are permanent, the mind will catch up.

You are an inspiration! Keep positive!!!

[greensleeve 457]

I think you have dysmorphic disorder.

I do have to say that part of you knows you are thin because you are wearing hot clothes and taking pictures. And you put on a bikini even!!

It's like a fun house mirror in my head most of the time. I will probably be the same way, rocking a hot dress one day and then seeing a fat woman in the mirror the next.

Our eyes play tricks on us, as does our brain.

[ohh_mandyy 211]

I think you have dysmorphic disorder. <br> I do have to say that part of you knows you are thin because you are wearing hot clothes and taking pictures. And you put on a bikini even!! <br> It's like a fun house mirror in my head most of the time. I will probably be the same way, rocking a hot dress one day and then seeing a fat woman in the mirror the next. <br> Our eyes play tricks on us, as does our brain.

Some days I think "wow! I look awesome!" Then the next day or even an hour later I see every ounce of fat and imperfection. I'm proud of what I've accomplished thus far but I can't stop seeing how much more I need to loose. I just keep thinking 20, 30 more pounds.

[ladyfenixnc 5]

I still see myself as the fat girl! You look amazing!

[angelicHG7 118]

You look fantastic. I hope to be able to just rock a pair of shorts with confidence....

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

You look beautiful. If time doesn't help you see it, get a therapist to help. You deserve to enjoy your new life.

[clucy2007 1]

I lost over 164lbs 7 yrs ago and still see 374lbs on the mirror. I'm able to do things I wasn't before but at times I still see the pls me = /

[Corridor72 518]

You are definitely NOT alone! I have lost 125 lbs and I'm 3 lbs from my original goal of 155 lbs, which is a healthy weight for my height and bone structure. People tell me all day long how great I look and those who haven't seen me in several months don't even recognize me until they hear MY voice come out of my face and then they're just shocked. I, on the other hand, still look in the mirror and I still see the same fat girl that has always been there. My surgeon brought up self image at my last visit and we discussed how my view of myself hasn't changed much yet. He basically said that it just takes time and that eventually I will start to see myself the way others do. I think he's probably right. My body has undergone a transformation in a relatively short period of time considering the amount of weight I've had to lose to get to this point and my brain just hasn't caught up yet.

[Corridor72 518]

Oh, and by the way, you look AMAZING!!!!

[ohh_mandyy 211]

My general practitioner said he is concerned with my desire to keep losing weight. He said if I lose another 10 lbs and still feel like I need to lose more, than he wants to see me again to evaluate to body image issue. I just feel like I need to lose so much more. I am going to talk to a therapist soon though.

And thank you very much for the compliment!

[DylanRae 71]

My doctor continues to repeat himself.

Im going in to get surgery on my stomach, not my brain. Only i can fix my brain.

Knowing this as i start my journey is probably the most helpful thing ever. The hard part is not managing your diet, Water intake, Vitamins or excersize, the hard part is finding confidence and then believing in it, in yourself.

I hope you find that confidence AND believe in it soon. But i am one to believe that you are what you say you are. Even just looking in the mirror and telling yourself out loud, "i am fit, healthy and the size i need to be." Once everyday, can make the biggest difference! Go ahead try it!

Everyday, until saying those words feels as much the truth as saying my name is...

good luck.